Maxy Tasty. 9 Bradford Street, Walsall. Reviewed 22/10/24.

It was post work on a Tuesday. I need to snack before starting the pre Walsall v Carlisle match drinking. I picked this place as I could amble down from work then head up Wednesbury Road to The Railway Club.

This has been open a while but I’d not been in. When I worked at Cardboard Boxes 2 Go on Queen Street, a colleague came here every dinnertime for chicken and chips so I sussed it was alright.

Service was friendly and quick. I went for a fish burger as I love a bit of cod. The meal deal came to £5 which was decent. There were a few other customers coming in and out and I didn’t know if this was due to proximity of bus stops or repeat customers. My food came quickly and I was heading upstairs.

The burger was really good. There was no music which I was fine with just the sounds of a busy venue. Place was clean too, emphasised by someone leaving adjacent to me and within 30 seconds a lad was up spraying and wiping the table and soon came back to sweep up.

Decent visit this and I can see why Ade was such a fan. I will come back and try the chicken one day soon. Although as I write this a month later, I haven’t.

Tiffany’s. 47 Albion Road, Willenhall. Reviewed 02/11/24.

There is a tradition in our family that dates back centuries that is on F.A Cup 1st round day you have to go out for a full English breakfast. I always keep this going. I’ve got to be honest, I’d never heard of this place until a saw a post on the Brownhills Bob Facebook group and the USP is that you can create your own breakfast from a a long list of options. As soon as I saw this I knew it was getting done, but it still took a couple of months to get around to it.

I find the 529 bus slightly more tolerable now that I don’t have to catch it at 6.40 every weekday morning to go to work and it was fine this time and I was soon in Willenhall.

I’m not sure why but I was slightly tentative as I asked “could I have the 10 item breakfast please?.” The lady serving was very friendly though and handed me a slip of paper and a pen for me to make my choices from the list of options on the note. It felt like I was voting in a kind of breakfast referendum. There should have been a wooden booth for me to go in to put my votes down.

I’d had the list up on my phone heading over. A few things were disregarded right away. Chips? I love chips but they don’t belong on a breakfast. Fried onions? I don’t have these on a hot dog so it’s not happening on breakfast. Smiley faces? No. Had they been miserable faces I may have been tempted as they would have been more in keeping with my general demeanour.

I made my choices and was almost apologetic upon heading over to the counter. “I’ve only got 9 items. Is that frowned upon?” “No, not at all” she replied “have an extra one of something you’ve already picked”. “Oh right. Another sausage then please.”. The breakfast was £9 and with a cup of tea it came to £10.20.

The cafe was doing a good trade. Every table was soon occupied. Background music was provided by Radio 1, a station I’ve not listened to since Scott Mills was moved off Drivetime in 2012. The only song I knew was Pon De Replay by Rihanna. Bit harsh playing a song about replays on F A Cup day now that they have been scrapped from the tournament.

The breakfast came quickly and it was magnificent. I only have scrambled eggs at home and I’m shit at making them but here they were divine. I was nervous about the battered black pudding and would it work but oh my God, yes it did.

This was a great visit. Food good, numerous members of staff emerged from the Kitchen and were friendly. The best compliment I can say about this place is it’s a good job I don’t live closer. My Doctor and Bank Manager would be fuming.

P.s you may have noticed I haven’t cracked the obvious Breakfast At Tiffany’s gag. 2 reasons for this. (1) I’ve not seen the film. (2) I absolutely hate the song. Cheers.

Pleck Balti. 303 Wednesbury Road, Pleck, Walsall. Reviewed 06/11/24

Josh and I had been on about going here for a while. I’d not been since the late 90’s and he’s been once or twice with his wife Lyndsey. We pass it regularly when we are on missions so it was about time we finally ventured in.

On the the morning at work I’d had a flashback to a recent trip to Shabab in Cannock and that was it. I was craving curry. Josh messaged at dinner time. “Pleck Balti tonight?” I swear that lad can read my mind.

I told my colleague Alex on the afternoon where I was going and he asked what I was having. I said “I don’t know but I’m just hoping they do a cheese naan.” “Not a Keema naan?” “I’ve never had one of those.” He was taken aback but said “it’s like fireworks in your mouth.” Well the day after Bonfire Night seemed like a good time for this to happen so it was motion carried.

I didn’t want to hang around for curry so we made it an early evening jobbie and arranged to meet there. As I left my house I asked if it might be worth asking our mate Asps as his office is in Wednesbury and he usually finishes around the time we were meeting. Josh posed the question and came back just as I was power marching down Corporation Street. I’m generally not a quick walker but this changes when beer or food is involved.

Josh came back saying Asps was up for it but not for another hour or so. He agreed to pick me up on Wednesbury Road and that we’d go and kill time somewhere.

I was just approaching the Pelican Crossing on Wednesbury Road when Josh drove past and he turned into Tasker Street. I crossed and was immediately joined by a prostitute. “Are you looking for business?” she asked. “no, I;m going for curry.” “Going for curry now?” “Nowish”. “Do you want business before your curry?” “It’s all about curry business tonight love.” I actually cringed as I said this. I’d now reached Tasker Street. Josh had turned round and parked up. A prostitute on the adjacent corner had clocked this and must have thought she was getting a fare. The look on her face as I strolled across the road and got in the car was something. We must have looked like a right pair of rent boys. Not many folk can make jumping into a bezzie mates car look so seedy. We left the ladies to go about their business and we roared off as quickly as the 20mph speed limit would allow.

Anyway, I digress. Asps was already there on arrival. Pleck Balti is not licensed. Regular readers will know that this is a big bug bear of mine but for once I wasn’t bothered. In all honesty I wanted a cup of tea having not had time for one upon getting home from work. I still maintain that I will never take my own booze but this time Josh popped to a local shop and grabbed a couple of Madri and handed me one.

They do a chicken tikka naan. Never heard of this so pounced on that along with a butter chicken main. Poppadoms were ordered but Asps only wanted one which I really couldn’t cope with. There was much catching up to be done and we had a great laugh and the food soon came out.

The butter chicken was great. The chicken tikka naan was ok. Not quite what I was expecting but all parts of the meal were demolished. The bill came and we went £15 each. Complimentary chocolates were provided which always earns extra points.

The lads enjoyed the visit. Josh’s feedback was “great food, amazing company” while Asps went for “great food, cheap as chips.” If you’re intrigued into what they had well I can’t help. I didn’t think to ask. I’m so rubbish at this reviewing lark. Jay Rayner I certainly am not.

Decent visit and we were all back home at a reasonable time. I had that cup of tea eventually.

Royal Lion, 22 Wallows Lane, Walsall. Reviewed 10/11/24

As mentioned in last Sunday’s blog, my mate Paul recently crashed at mine and during our discussions beforehand he asked about Sunday morning breakfast. I asked would he come and review somewhere sexy? and he replied saying he likes sexy, so I earmarked this place.

Royal Lion is situated in what was the King George V pub by Fellows Park (Mozza’s if you were born after the 1980s). It opens at 8am everyday even Sunday which was handy as Paul had a train back up North to catch.

The layout is exactly the same as when it was the pub. When sitting I pointed out where The Crystal Maze machine used to be. Paul commented that I had a look of Richard O’Brien about me. Man if I had just an ounce of that bloke’s creativity I’d be delighted.

I’d shown Paul the breakfast menu the day before and we both knew what we wanted. Royal Full English no tomato or mushroom for me and a Mozart Omelette for Paul. His omelette contains ham, garlic, spinach and cheese served with homemade Focaccia. See I can do details occasionally but it helps that I still have a picture of the menu on my phone.

It didn’t take long for the food to come out, but long enough for me to crack a “your omelette must be taking some composing” gag. I did try my hardest not to say this but it had been eating away at me since he announced his choice the day before.

Food came and the items I didn’t want had been swapped for additional goodness of the other items. My toast was not cut in half which earned bonus points. Any work colleague who has seen me at dinner time over the past 34 years will testify that I do not cut sandwiches in half so it was good to find somewhere with the same principles.

We also got a free bottle of water. I waited and waited for Paul to crack it open but no. It had one of those bottle tops that you get (used to get?) with Grolsch. I clearly am,not a drinker of this and it showed. It felt like I was on The Crystal Maze and Paul should have started whistling the theme to set the scene. He helped me open it in the end. I don’t do technology, even fancy bottle tops.

My breakfast was ace. Loved it. Paul said his omelette was well composed and hit the right notes. It was a good visit. No music but two tv screens had Sky Sports News on.

You can tell it was the George although the decor has had a complete transformation. There was excitement in the toilet as the mirror has a sensor that you can touch to light up the surround. I did this three or four times. Sometimes I do do technology.

The bill puzzled me as it seemed cheap but the waiter explained that hot drinks are free with breakfast which was nice. Friendly place, excellent food and I might do it again before a Saturday home game.