Evo Boozy Scribbler

We visited Bewdley regularly as kids. My parents had a static caravan there and weekend stays were regular. However, as soon as I was old enough to stay at home on my own, that was it. I never went back to the caravan. Eventually my parents gave it up. After a couple of family tragedies I returned in 2013, a quarter of a century later – to reconnect with my childhood.

Mase and I had a sensational pub crawl there in 2018, we went again in 2019 with Ben and planned a 2020 visit until Covid put paid to it. And that was it. Until yesterday when I headed back.

The train was a quiet affair which I could cope with. Down the line a man and his young son got on. I’m no eavesdropper but could hear their football chat. This culminated in a quiz. I played along in my head. The kid did much better but in my defence it was all modern Premier League question. I sat and waited for the 1990s Walsall FC category but it didn’t come because they alighted at New Street. I did get a point for knowing the name if West Hams ground and awarded myself a bonus one for knowing the old one too. I should have thrown a shoe over a building. That’s the real quiz.

I had to change at Smethwick Galton Bridge. You may recall the kerfuffle I had last time I was there. If not it’s here, but this time I’d done my research, knew which platform I needed and despite only having 7 minutes to negotiate signs and stairs, I made it – even allowing myself a Tim Henman style raised clenched fist gesture as I hit the platform. I was soon hurtling towards Kidderminster.

I needed the Severn Valley Railway, a preserved steam train line between Kidderminster and Bridgnorth. 

Kidderminster Station on the SVR is picturesque. I wanted to take pictures but was worried about my phone battery. Whilst the bezzie Josh loves a flat phone battery, I don’t.

The journey was great. The train was being pulled by an LMS locomotive which my dad would have been happy with. The third class coach was better than some modern ones. We passed the Safari Park and some people on the train waved at the rhinos. I didn’t. I’m a miserable sod. I liked to think the rhinos didn’t give a shit about being waved at.

It was a very pleasant walk into Bewdley. Its bustling but tranquil if that makes sense. The River Severn just looks amazing and the town looks as it did hundreds of years ago. It’s beautiful.

First stop was Bewdley Brewery Tap. I’m sure that back in the 1980s this was The Brass Rubbing & Arts Centre. Unfortunately the B & r of Brass fell off. We begged our dad to tale a picture and send it to Esther Rantzen. He eventually did but that night we sat down for That’s Life – standard Sunday evening in our house, and someone had beaten us to it. It got a big laugh from the studio audience too which didn’t help. 

Anyway it was my first visit to this tap and it’s great. A whole wall dedicated for award certificates and another with big old maps. Lots of brewery paraphernalia dotted around, friendly barmaid and air con made this a good start to the day.

There were stools and a bench outside the toilets so if you partner likes a long toilet visit like a former friend of mine does, you have somewhere to wait if you’re on the way out.

The Little Pack Horse was next. This one has always eluded me but was open this time. I tentatively made my way down the very dark side passage and was almost nervous as I crept in with my eyes still adjusting. Barman was welcoming though and straight onto me as he’d seen me taking pictures of the brewery. Locals were friendly too, thinking I was Facebook content creator Dudley Explorer who’d been in the town a couple of days previously.

There were two dogs, one of which was called Eric which is a great dog name. More dogs should be called Eric. Andy Burnham should legislate this. Eric befriended me. He was ace.

Music was mostly Bryan Adams but we were treated to the Roy Orbison original of I Drove All Night which is as epic as it is creepy. As I finished my drink on came the Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark classic Walking On The Milky Way. I’d have sat it out but I had walking on Bewdley High Street to do so I bade my new friends, both human and canine goodbye and headed out.

When I first came back to Bewdley in 2013, I stayed over. I looked for digs and was intrigued by The Woodcolliers Arms which had rooms. The reviews were mixed, one calling the owner Basil Fawlty with all the opinions split between love and hate for him. I knew I had to stay there. We’d driven past it millions of times as kids. I knew it become a private dwelling a few years ago but I still had a look.

In 2018, Mase and I were running out of time and had to pick between Horn & Trumpet and The White Swan and picked the former purely because it had an England flag in the window. It seems to have had a makeover in the intervening years. The barmaid listed the available cobs and she had me with ham and cheese. After the outrage that I caused in Alvechurch requesting ham and cheese on the same cob (relive cobgate here) I was pleased to hear that they are readily available in other parts of Worcestershire. 

This was the busiest pub of the day so far but there was room at the bar and I perched myself there. Televisions all over the place showing a variety of sports. Had it been a couple of hours later I’d have asked if they could find a stream for the Walsall v Notts County friendly.

I hadn’t made anything awkward yet. This was to change in The White Swan. “Do you do coffee?” I asked whilst looking strait at the coffee machine behind the bar. I think she thought I was taking the piss. Both ladies were friendly and it was a much needed coffee whilst some absolute classics from the 80’s played out including the Whitney Houston song where she does a Ric Flair impression at the start.

Something about this pub that I like. It’s upmarket but feels traditional. Sorry we missed you in 18 White Swan.

Across the road is Weavers Of Bewdley. Very cool place with a music wall of vinyl single sleeves, with ELO Last Train To London blasting out. Which was nice as it reminded to check the train back to Kiddy. As much as I love Bewdley, I didn’t want an overnight stay, especially as there would be no interaction with Roger at The Woodcolliers.

Next up was The Talbot. This was my must tick of the day. Eluded me on previous visits, and not open when I’d strolled past after leaving The Little Pack Horse. Deep joy though when I saw the door open. 

Did I make a nob of myself? Of course. I was looking up ruefully at the mind your head signs, which were a good foot above me, completely missed the mind the step one, the step itself, stumbled down it and spilt drink everywhere. I sheepishly returned to the bar to ask for a mop. Fair play to the barman, he said he’d sort it. Thanks fella. Reminds me of one of my favourite jokes. Skeleton walks into a pub and says “can I have a pint of lager and a mop please?”

The pub is cool. Decked out with old tech, a typewriter which brought back memories of the hours I spent bashing away at mine in the 80’s and 90’s.

Music was good including Saturn 5 by Inspiral Carpets, which caused me huge frustration recently when the lyric “that’s a popular misconception” popped in my head and I couldn’t remember which song it was from. I had to wait for Virgin Radio to play it as I wasn’t allowed to Google it as per Frank Skinner’s rule.

I stayed for a second, not because I lost some of the first but because I loved the place. Had a chat with the barman who was cool and landlady Sandy told me about the pub. She’s had it 38 years and clearly loves the place.

Final stop was The Real Ale Tavern. Bewdley’s Black Country Ales pub. The sign outside advised air con which I’d never seen as a pubs selling point before but I bet it’s pulled in some passing trade. The reverse side advised of a cheese night every Wednesday which also enticed me. Alongside the well filled cobs there was also duck food which I’ve never seen in a pub before.

En route back to the station I made a pit stop at Riverside Pizza & Grill. Food was good and the bloke serving was descent. Nice last bit of Bewdley action. 

On the train back someone announced that the rhinos had gone. Probably didn’t want to get waved at again.

Back in Kidderminster, I went to The Old Peacock Inn, eventually despite unhelpful townsfolk. The one time I’m brave enough to ask it doesn’t work. I eventually called a taxi and let the driver do the finding. Great pub though and rounded the day off a treat. I’ll report on that one another day.

Superb day. Mase has said Bewdley 27 is on. Counting the seconds.

Early start last Saturday. Missions like Mozzas and the bank to start the day.

Absolutely none of my business I appreciate but a guy in Mozzas spent £50 on the £5 Millionaire Maker scratchcards. You should only gamble what you can afford to lose and if he can afford to lose £50 then good luck to him. Hope he got the million. Conversely I looked at the £1 scratchcards and thought ‘maybe on payday.’

The early start was so I could meet Villa Chris again. Our mutual friend and fellow Walsall FC fan Claire had helped me out last season so I offered to take her out and shout her food on one of my Walsall eaterie reviews and this developed to drinks in Birmingham along with her partner Phil and the aforementioned Chris. 

Claire and Phil were going to the Walsall FC kit launch so we agreed to meet them in Brum with Chris getting on the bus by his house and me by mine.

Chris is obsessed with the X51 bus and has been trying to get me on it wth him for decades. With the trains on limited service due to strikes, finally he could tick that box. 

It was roasting on board. Upon arrival I felt my shirt. My “72 hour” deodorant had failed within 3 hours of it going on. Chris found a shop and bought us bottled water. I just wanted to hold it on my head.

This was my 3rd successive Saturday trip to Birmingham. First was the magnificent day with Chris and James that you can catch up on here.

2nd though was less successful. I had a big jar of loose change to weigh in and because I didn’t want to pay the near 12% charge at the Coinstar machine, I had the best idea ever. It would be cheaper to get the train to Birmingham and use the version of the machine in Santander that does the sane job, without charge with the money going into your account.

Regular readers will know that when I have the best idea ever, it quickly goes to shit and this was no exception. I lugged the heavy jar there to be told they got rid of the machine “ages ago.”

So I’d spent the rest of that weekend sorting the coins out, taking all the 20p ones to Santander in Walsall on this morning with the money covering a hotel stay in August and the rest going to the Coinstar machine in Mozzas which allowed me to come out of austerity for today.

So as we past the Santander in Birmingham now, I took the trouble to flick them the v’s after last Saturdays banter from them. 

We met Claire and Phil and jumped on the Metro. Strolling along Broad Street I sneezed 3 times in quick succession, two noticeably more audible than the other which caused people to look round. My manager at work David says that if you sneeze 3 times in a row, you can make a wish.

One wish – female related popped straight into my head but having seen the film Obession I disregarded it and wished instead for a stress free England victory over Norway in the World Cup that evening.

We were making a return to The Vine. I said in the last blog that I intended to come again but did think it would take longer than a fortnight. We’d been enticed back by the World Cup menu. 

Upon entry we asked if food was on to be told by the barman “I’m on my own, I don’t usually do the food and I don’t know where things are. If I can find it, you can have it.”

We settled down but after a minute or so I moved to the left slightly. I wasn’t doing The Timewarp and to the untrained eye it may have looked like I was trying to get closer to Claire. In triuth, and I’m a strange creature of habit I was just trying to be in the exact same spot I’d been in a fortnight before. 

We perused the menus and ordered. I swear that I tried to pay for my food but Chris waved away my attempts. They actually do a crisp sandwich. Never seen this on a menu before. Had Prawn Cocktail crisps been an option, I’d have been all over it.

No Downton Abbey on the big TV this time but England Cricket instead. We were 108-4 but I know not who we were playing. I’m sure it will be on the BBC website if you need to know.

Food came quickly along with 3 of the emptiest sauce bottles I’ve ever encountered. I failed to get any joy so Chris stepped in to help. The sight of him vigorously shaking a bottle of Mayo then trying to splurt its creamy white goodness on my food was strangely relaxing.

Music was varied with classics like Panic Af Disco “I Write Sins Not Tragedies” with a dollop of randomness provided by Milli Vanilli with “Girl I’m Gonna Miss You”. I joined in with this and therefore providing more vocals than they did. I’ve always wondered if you request to do a Milli Vanilli song at karaoke, do you then have to get someone else to sing it? Just to keep it real. 

As mentioned in the last blog, I love the purple colour of the toilet doors. I concocted a plan. “Claire on the way out, could you and Phil create a distraction please? Me and Chris will then sneak the toilet doors out.” I have the perfect place for the male one. What I’ll do with the female one requires further thought.

We departed, I forgot the doors – guess I’ll have to go back, and we headed to Broad Street where I spotted two ladies walking along under an umbrella.

It wasn’t raining, although I hadn’t checked the weather forecast I had no reason to believe any downfall was imminent. They seemed happy enough though so fair play. Prepared for any sudden downfall. They do happen nowadays.

We headed into Reflex. Only my second visit, it was the final tick – number 404 of the Pub 365 Challenge (vol 1) in 2011.

Even before I’d got a drink, a lass was over dancing with me. She was only messing about, but was dressed in white and looked stunning so I enjoyed the moment.

The music was 80s and all excellent. “Kiss Me” by Stephen TinTin Duffy being the pick of them and I actually threw some shapes to that one hoping to impress the plethora of ladies in the vicinity. They weren’t. In another life I’ll have the guts to try and chat one up but not in this one. 

It was red hot in there and I stood under an air vent willing cold air out of it. Chris sneaked behind and picked me up by the armpits like we were in a ballet. He wouldn’t have manged that 10 years ago when I was the build of a wardrobe. I was just glad my shirt had dried there.

Claire and Phil had to be elsewhere for the match so we walked them back towards New Street then went hunting for more refreshments.

We tried to get in a new bar 24 Stories but were turned away as there was no room at the Inn giving us a Christmas feel even earlier than normal. It wasn’t just us as a group of ladies were also refused entry. Chris led us on following yonder star.

He took us to Newhall Street Tavern. I thought it looked familiar but unticked by myself. I’ve since discovered it used to be Edmunds Brewhouse which was always on my to do list. The barmaid asked if I wanted ice in my Coke and I said “I’d rather have some for my head” and she gave me extra in a separate glass. Top lass. It felt so good on the back of my neck.

For some reason I couldn’t get up on the high chair. I had to use the bannister behind while Chris held the table. Not my best look. I won’t be making a Wimbledon umpire anytime soon. 

Chris said he was going to the loo to wet his t-shirt and he wasn’t lying. He came back with it saturated. He’d have won contests back in the 90s looking like that. 

The barman had a shirt bearing the Rolling Stones logo with the tongue as an England flag. So cool.

A passing barmaid swiped my glass which still had 1 ice cube in which I’d been saving for one last refresh which cost them a point but it was a decent first visit.

Next up was The White Swan. A new one for both of us.Stylish place, central bar which I always like and the best toilets ever. Chris is our Crisps Correspondant and they had some even he hadn’t seen before which were decent.

The barman had been hunting for bags of ice cubes and reporting that all the supermarkets had run out. No wonder the barmaid in the last place grabbed my remaining one. Rationing kicking in again.

There is a wine room which can be hired and when I finally meet a lady we are so going there for a date*.

*This promise may not be honoured when I find out the price.

There were stairs next to this room and Chris marched up them much to my horror. “You can’t go up there” I protested but to no avail. I followed upstairs and it led to a hotel reception.

There was an umbrella hire facility which I’ve never seen before and marvelled at. We need these in Walsall. They’d make a killing just from Swill who is forever losing them. Those ladies on Broad Street must have also seen it and wanted in hence them holding one gleefully.

I paused by the door as we left to allow 4 women in and two of them thanked me. Duly added doorman to my CV.

As we were close to Needless Alley, the best street name ever I had to pay a visit but I was forbidden to walk down it for my own good. I resisted the urge to give it a Mark and Lard style “no need.”

The Windsor on Cannon Street is being transformed into an O’Neils. Chris had wanted to show me on the morning but I turned it down citing “I don’t need to see ot.” Fake news. Truth however was that seeing that would have deviated me away from the Santander that I wanted to flick the v’s at. Someone at O’Neils didn’t proof read the sign before it went up though. It says New Street rather than Cannon Street. This person, like a cannon should be fired.

The trains appeard to be running again so we headed to New Street. Chris said “I bet there will be some of your lot (Walsall fans) at the station.” We’d had our first pre season friendly away at Lemington and he was right. We struck up conversation on the train and they sit in the next block to me at Bescot. I asked the lady to give me a wave at the next home game and advised it’s usually about 3.10 when I walk in.

Back in Walsall Chris announced that he was having one more drink then heading home for the match so after a short while in Wetherspoons we said our goodbyes.

The 51 bus by the Town Hall gave “come to me” eyes, or should that be headlights and I deduced that having already tapped onto a bus a couple of times, this tap would be free under the daysaver scheme and despite living just 30 minutes walk away, I gave into those alluring headlights.

I got home, it was meant to be just a freshen up mission but auto pilot kicked in. The kettle and radio went straight on which is standard procedure for when I walk in. This was followed by the air fryer and slippers going on. I’d had no notifications that anyone was heading out for the game so after The Legal Hour on LBC I stuck the television on.

The Sneeze Gods that I prayed to on Broad Street partially listened hey. I just wish I’d had a hat trick of sneezes on Wednesday. 

Cracking day. Cheers Claire, Phil and Chris. 

Last Saturday started in standard fashion. Up at 6, make mossiv mug of tea then back to bed to listen to Tony Blackburn’s Sounds Of The 60s on Radio 2. The 7am listener request was Rainbow Valley by Love Affair. I knew at this point that a class day was incoming. 

Villa Chris had been on and we’d arranged a day out. I say we’d arranged but in truth he had. I had no knowledge of destination, just that I neded to be at Walsall Railway Station at 1pm with a bus, train and tram daysaver. I’d not seen Chris since he’d turned up in Katz on Christmas Day but it had been a year since our last trip out, the magnificent Sophie B. Hawkins gig which you can catch up on here.

The trains were being grumpy due to the heat, I could relate – I had been like it at work too. They were being cancelled and there were only two trains an hour to Birmingham so we liaised and arranged to meet ten minutes early to catch the “fast” one.

It was busy and at the end of the carriage were 8 ladies, clearly out for a good day. Chris mentioned “imagine if the world ends while we’re on this train and only the folk on here survive. It would be down to us and them to repopulate the world.” I replied that it sounded quite 28 Days Later but with shagging and that I might start writing it. Netflix would snap it up. I didn’t mention the obvious flaw to his plan, the fact that other men were on the train. 

As the train hurtled towards Birmingham thete was a strange incident. One of the women did a shimmy up to me and then turned around and headed back. It was filmed and I mentioned to Chris that it would be on TikTok in minutes and it was about time that I made it on there.

At New Street the escalator was working. Hope you were sitting down for that bombshell. For a dose of normality though, the lift wasn’t. 

The 3 of us, sorry – not mentioned James yet, headed to the Bull Ring, don’t think I’ve been in there since the 80’s when it was a totally different building. Straight away we heard the beep beep of someone forgetting to pay before leaving a store. 

As we past the North Face store I saw a great slogan on the wall. “Never stop exploring.” That’s my new mission statement. Chris pointed out that there is an Aston Villa shop downstairs. I pointed out that I may not pop in. 

An escalator was broken. With a Birmingham broken escalator now under my belt I could relax and enjoy the day.

As we left the centre we saw we’d just missed a 35 bus. My fault for fannying around at New Streer. Only 10 minutes until the next one so no bother. Chris showed me his bus daysaver. They have a unique word each day so the driver knows it’s valid. Todays was “Flop” I said “hope that’s not an omen for the England match later.”

If you need a break from the hectic modern life, just catch a bus in Birmingham. You’ll have ample time to catch your breath while it sits in traffic. To liven things up, 3 passengers changed seats. I didn’t know bus Musical Chairs was a thing. Chris had brief chats with one of them but despite me being closest to the guy, I didn’t join in. Making friends isn’t for me.

We passed some closed pubs including The Lamp Tavern which is just the best pub in Digbeth. Please, someone take it on. We were heading to the Sir Charles Napier. I said I may have been in on Pub Challenge 3 but couldn’t remember it. I’ve since checked my notes and yes, I ticked it off in 2017 when it was called The Fountain. I loved it that day.

It was windy while I took pictures and the breeze was amazing. I nearly stayed outside. However inside big ceiling fans were in operation which were very welcome. The locals were friendly and one of them hit the jukebox and put some corkers on. We had ac/dc for starters and Song Of The Day contender Bankrobber by The Clash although The Strokes rocked up next with Last Night to stake their own claim for the title.

No World Cup paraphernalia was evident save for a sweepstake poster. I’ll drop them an England flag in if we make the final. 

I had a message from my mate Mark Egan – the video of the lady on the train had already made it to Facebook.

https://www.facebook.com/share/r/18uVrzF1Bw/

En route to the next pub we incured the wrath of a bloke cycling on the pavement who gave us an angry hand gesture as he negotiated his bike around us. I was always told as a kid that cycling on the pavement was illegal but appreciate it’s seemingly allowed nowadays like a lot of crime. 

We headed to The Twelfth Man, a new one on me. A pub handily placed to refresh Cricket fans who have been to Warwickshire’s Edgbaston Stadium.

What the last place was lacking in England flags, was made up for it here. They were everywhere. Even on the toilet doors.

Chris won the £100 jackpot on the fruit machine making me wonder if we were getting out of there alive. He joined me and opened a discussion. “I had the Cricket Curry in here once.” I was peckish and wondering if they did food “Really?” I asked. “Yeah. It gave me the runs.” “I can’t believe I walked into that.”

We headed to the nearby chippy The Island House. I really don’t do fish and chip shops anymore so was was all over that. No cricket puns on the menu. Surely the jumbo and regular sausages could have been called stumps and bails. I meant to try and think of some cricket based chip shop puns but forgot. Feel free to put your own in the comments. I dived straight on the small mixed meat and chips. Normally it’s large as standard with me but I’m on an economy drive and trying to be more healthy nowadays so I got Chris to have most of the chips and some meat.

Next up, after a very welcome bottle of water and an Uber – both courtesy of Chris’s winnings we arrived at The Vine, close to Five Ways and Broad Street but just about in Ladywood apparently. Traditional, back street and It just hit me as a great pub on entry They were just putting out a buffet which was very decent of them. We’ve just eaten but thanks. If pub love at first sight is a thing then this was it. Apparently it’s threatened with redevelopment. It needs saving. It’s a gem. 

The pub was already busy with people in England shirts ready for the Panama match but the big screen was not showing sport. I had to Google the ITV1 schedule as I didn’t know what it was. Downton Abbey. I gather it’s a popular show but I’ve never seem it and despite having a great view, it didn’t grab me.

The music did though and it was all 80s as was the feel of the commercial break in Downton. I wasn’t paying attention and maybe I had a bit of sunstroke as I’m sure I caught out the corner of my eye the words Renault 5 on screen. This was my joint favourite car as a kid along with the 4 and the Feugo. Wasn’t the slogan “what’s yours called?” Mine would have bern called Chloe. Thanks for asking. 

Pub had great retro signs, there was a bonus point for the shade of purple that the toilet doors are and the World Cup food menu was amazing. £3.50 for a double cheeseburger in Birmingham, that close to Broad Street? It’s £6.50 for one of those at my beloved Walsall FC. Had England v Democratic Republic Of Congo not kicked off half an hour after I finished work, I’d have been heading there. But I will be back. This place needs a revisit.

Next was Peg & Grill on Bishopgate Street. Certainly not a new tick this one as I went in numerous times when it was a Highgate pub called The City Tavern and also once as The Bulls Head in 2021 when it was trying to be Peaky Blinders themed. Now a desi pub and it’s not really a stroll in for a pint place, you have to book a table but they let us have a reserved one for half an hour. 

It’s so different to it’s former self. I startled a waitress in the back room when I was having a nose. Meekley explained that we used to have meet ups in thete in the 90s. She didn’t seem convinced.

There is a 5% discount for paying cash. I’m all over that. Kimbo who is on a mission to tick off all the Midlands desi pubs has been summonsed to join me. Dunno what was to die for in here the most, food or air con? Food. Just. Smelt amazing. One mixed grill was piled so high that James said you’d need a ladder to get on top of it.

Next up was Snobs. Retick as I went in about 10 years ago when it was called Oh Velvet. Maybe it was a bit early for trendy bars as there weren’t many in but the barmaid was decent.

On Broad Street is a branch of Lee Longlands. Chris asked if I remembered the 80’s advert. We both belted out the jingle “leave it, leave it, leave it to Lee. Leave it to Lee Longlands.” I’ll be wanting to go to Barretts Of Feckenham next.

We popped to Eimear’s next, another new one for me. An Irish bar with two lads on drums and a guitar respectively. They were decent and there was a good amount of people in. Chris shouted the Tayto crisps which he said was compulsory in an Irish bar.

Enjoyable as it was in there, time was getting on. We’d said we’d be back in Walsall for the England game. Since the London trip I’ve been on self administered austerity measures again, have barely been out and for the first time since Italia 90 when I was too young to drink – I’d watched England tournament games at home. So I wanted England v Panama action in the Walsall Arms. I’m under austerity until August but on this day the purse strings were being relaxed and I wanted to show me face in the Arms as it had been a while.

Chris and James were enjoying Brum so I told them to stay put but I’d make my excuses and leave. I just missed a tram outside and the next one wasn’t for another 16 minutes so I opted to walk, thinking I’d just beat it to New Street. It was a very pleasant walk with a buzz in the air as many folk in England shirts mingled about.

There is normally a train back to Walsall at 20.45, 21.00 and 21.15. I got to New Street at 20.40 and there was no sign of the first two on the departure board so I hung around. The 21.15 rocked up at 21.21 and finally departed at 21.31. The train was busy due to previous cancellations and a group that boarded that would have been nowhere near it had it departed on time played very loud music for the whole journey. 

I knew that due to the delay I was now missing kick off. Standard for me me at Walsall games but hey, I was now doing it on the world stage.

Being late allowed me time to get into disappointed mode. As a Walsall and England fan I am used to this mode so do it early nowadays to save time at the final whistle.

I made it to the Walsall Arms about 12 minutes in and we were on the attack. It wasn’t until about 5 minutes after sitting down did I realise that Panama were in white.

You don’t need a match report. Most folk have probably already forgotten it but it was nice to finally get the win although I’ll admit I was looking at a dating app when the first goal went in, my focus on the game just waning a little. It was free shots every time England scored but I was a good boy and turned them both down. 

The same offer had been in place for the previous match. The Ghanaian witch doctor who put a curse on Harry Kane (and seemingly the whole England team) to stop him scoring must have saved the pub a fortune. He should have bookings going through the roof after that sucess. Get it on your business cards fella.

I had one more pint after the final whistle then headed home, casting a wishful glance en route to the closed for the night Danny’s Chicken.

Epic day. Great to see James again as I hadn’t had a day out with him since the December 2024 wander around Pelsall and Shelfield, which you can read about here. I found out later that they’d had one pint in The Craven Arms and got a taxi back. They’d have been back in Walsall while I was still at New Street. Oh well, it all worked out.

Right, thanks for reading but I gotta go. Still got those 80’s advert in my head. Craving some Um Bongo. You know they drink it in the actual Democratic Republic Of Congo? Fair play to em.

I’m enjoying the football free Saturdays. Unthinkable just a few years ago. I looked at all those Saturdays and thought ‘yeah. Let’s get some more Monopoly board properties ticked off.’ So I picked the first Saturday of June thinking the weather would be glorious.

Facebook has now clocked onto my love of the London Monopoly board and Underground and I’m now getting adverts for related merchandise. I’ve already succumbed and purchased a poster with my street on it as would appear on the board. I put it it in the red set. Just colour preference, no reflection on value. Swill, who used to live on the road said it should have been in a set further back round the board. Yeah cheers fella.

I also saw a duvet set with a London Underground map on it. That’s got to be done. Imagine next time I get a lovely lady in bed. I won’t know which station to visit first. I mentioned this to Josh and he said “would she let you change at Baker Street though?” If you don’t know what this means, I wouldn’t Google it at work. 

So, if you’re here for the first time after a Google search welcome. It’s edition 199 of my waffle, you have some catching up to do. I digress, I’m currently on a mission to visit all the Monopoly board properties and getting each square signed. After 2 trips, I’d managed 4 ticks. This needed to be a more productive day. 

En route to Walsall railway station I had Tony Blackburn’s “Sounds Of The 60s” show on Radio 2 playing. He spun “Everlasting Love” by Love Affair. One of the best songs ever and I knew then that this was going to be a good day. 

At New Street there were noticeable gasps of disbelief as people clocked that the escalator was actually working. One bloke had already got his missus in a fireman’s lift ready to carry her up. Ok I might have made that last bit up to keep you interested. 

On the train just before Euston I needed the loo and someone had peed all over the seat. I tentatively lifted it and got to work. I didn’t hang around and tried to leave sharpish but of course there was a cute lass waiting who would assume it was me. Bad situation all because of a dirty sod.

At Euston, on the concourse I had an idea. Would I be able to get a map of the Underground from the information desk? I’ve been trying to find a diary with one in and have appealed for a print out but got suggestions of downloading the app. Nope. I’m from the 1970’s. I want something physical I can hold, plus you can’t buy an event ticket nowadays without having to download a use once app so I try to avoid this.

Success. I got a map. Believe me this was a bit like porn to me. Other and better types of porn are available.

The Northern Line has more branches than Lloyds Bank. Ok that’s pushing it but you know, maybe in a couple of years. Anyway it’s a bit complex but fortunately a diagram was at hand showing all lines and which platform required and within minutes I was moving South. 

I’d done my research and the first bus I saw outside Elephant & Castle tube station served Old Kent Road, I just had to make sure it was going in the right direction.

So, Old Kent Road. The cheapest property on the London board and the only one south of the river. It’s the A2 if you’re a fan of the UK road numbering system. 

Ozzies Cafe was my destination. They had English tea at £1.80. I asked the lady to sign the board and she was a bit unsure but eventually agreed. A nice lady struck up conversation about “the football” as she called it and tipped me off that the toilet was working despite the out of order sign.

No music but there was a loud bang, causing the two females present to turn and look at me. I did wonder for a second if I’d caused it. There was then the sound of some heavy braking and horn beeping outside which had both ladies running from behind the counter to the door to investigate.

The bus stop advised Elephant & Castle and Tower Bridge, so I assumed all buses went there and jumped on the first one. But it was going to Liverpool Street via Tower Bridge. Oh well, I’ve never done the London touristy thing so I’d not seen Tower Bridge with my own eyes let alone crossed it. It was ace.

I knew my route had I got back to Elephant and Castle but at Liverpool Street, on the board but which I’d already ticked off I asked Google and was soon on the Central Line en route to Bond Street. This actually worked better as I wasn’t looking forward to trying to find the green set from Park Lane.

When we did the Monopoly Pub Crawl (blog here) in 2009, we were going to get t-shirts printed with “What happens on Bond Street, stays on Bond Street.” This was left to me to sort so needless to say it didn’t happen. 

I walked up Oxford Street in the rain without seeing anywhere I fancied popping in for a signature and traipsed down Bond Street too scared to ask a passer by. Bond Street is very posh and no wonder it has top billing in the green set. There wasn’t a cheap shop for me to buy anything and ask for an autograph. I spotted a gallery with some smart people standing in the doorway. I grew a pair and asked. The first guy didn’t understand but another one came rushing forward and was happy to sign then said “she works on Oxford Street.” Two ticks in one hit. Nice people too.

Oxford Street has a McDonald’s so I dived in there. It has a lift which I’ve not seen in one of those before and head high hand dryers in the loos. It’s fair to say they are probably chest height to normal people. 

I headed to Regent Street. Again not much in the way of cheap shops. Certainly no Sports Direct. After assessment of the street I popped into Calvin Klein. I don’t need any new pants believe me, I have plenty but as I perused, a nice lady came to help. I pointed at a pair of boxer shorts and said “there’s no size on these.” “They are medium. What size are you?” I lied and said medium, and I really don’t know why. Maybe I panicked and didn’t want her to think I’m fat. She got a stool, reached up and handed me a pack. “These are medium in that style. In the sale too.” I felt compelled after the effort she had gone to, to buy some so I mentioned I only like white. She got up, grabbed another pack and I headed to the till. I was hoping to get away with a cheap purchase of one pair but you know – 3 is the magic number yeah?

I might shrink into them and I am doubling my efforts to find Mrs Right so they might come in handy in about 8 years when I’ve pulled and finally reached my 10 stone target. 

At the counter another lady was more than happy to sign the board and as the other two greens hadn’t cost anything so a bill of £30 for 3 pairs of pants wasn’t too bad. I felt like I was in an episode of Absolutely Fabulous leaving a posh store on Regent Street with a bag.

Great Marlborough Street leads off Regent Street so I ambled down there and found the Coach and Horses. £4.95 for a can of Diet Coke but I was parched after all that walking and the guy serving was happy to sign the board. 

One stop down the Victoria Line from Oxford Circus is Green Park. I exited the wrong way again. Vine Street has top billing in the orange set. It got shortened in the 18th century to make way for Regent Street and now it’s shit. You wouldn’t get 4 houses and a hotel on it, although the corner is now a construction site so maybe someone is trying. 

A waiter was in a doorway on his break. I explained what I was doing and asked if he’d sign the board. He grunted. I took this as a yes and waited patiently (and awkwardly) alongside him while he smoked his fag. He finished it then got another one out. I took this as a “sod off George.” So I did. I asked a delivery driver who refused. It was now raining so passers by on Swallow Street were scurrying past. I tried taking a selfie of myself in front of the road sign hoping a group of ladies outside the adjacent fish restaurant would offer to take it then I could ask one of them but they all ignored me. So I sacked it off but believe me Vine Street, were not done yet. 

On Piccadilly I found a coffee shop Volonte and got a pot of English Breakfast Tea and a signature for £3.95 from the nice lass serving. She didn’t charge for the signature.

I tried to get a picture of the place but it wasn’t easy with a popular bus stop right outside and millions of passers by jostling with wannabe passengers. I did say “God, it’s like Piccadilly Circus here” which of course it wasn’t. That was 3 minutes walk away.

The Rose and Crown on Old Park Lane was a bit odd to start with. Plenty of seats but a large crowd had used themselves and some strategically placed stools to make an impenetrable barrier splitting the pub in two. Then one of them moved slightly and I ghosted in undetected and made it through the divide where I was welcomed by a friendly barman who knew the score saying I was his third Monopoly board signature of the day. 

I grabbed my Diet Coke and settled down and watched as the human shield all made for the door. I was glad of the sit down and with the noise levels reduced we were treated to Eric Clapton. We also had “Here Comes The Sun” which believe me was absolute wishful thinking. Great pub with decent staff, although I did nearly fall down the last couple of stirs on way to the loo.

It was gone 6 as I left the Rose and Crown. 90 minutes until my train. I pondered Coventry Street but sacked it off. Had I done Rose and Crown before the coffee shop then hell yeah but I was being ultra cautious again. 

I was back at Euston and had an hour to kill so marauded around the concourse in search of a generic purveyor of newspapers and books in the hope of them having a lottery terminal. I only play when it’s a must be won draw but I couldn’t find anywhere. Oh well, there are better ways to spend £2. Like buying 8 packs of Beef Space Raiders. Kids, please don’t gamble or buy 8 packs of Beef Space Raiders in one go.

The journey home was uneventful but it was a successful-ish day. 8 Properties visited, 7 of them signed off and I can head a bit more central London next time.

I left the boxer shorts in London somewhere.

About a month ago, Mel from Katz shared a post saying that Chris Moyles was doing a “Daytime Disco” at a club in Birmingham. I wanted in. Anyone who knows me will testify that I don’t do television, I’m a radio geek and Moyles is one of my heroes. I’ve got (and read) both of his books, was with him for the playing of Love Machine on his first day at Radio X. Hell, I’m that on brand I had a housemate nicknamed Comedy Dave. So I couldn’t turn this down, especially with vip tickets at £17.

Cooking breakfast on the morning and it was bacon on naan bread – a rare treat but absolutely amazing and the concept of which was introduced to the nation by Chris’s former producer James.

Cooking tunes were “Nothing Matters” by The Last Dinner Party, a couple of Blossoms tracks plus a curveball “Goodbye Stranger” by Supertramp. A song I’d heard numerous times, liked but didn’t know what it was until Moyles played it and explained that folk might not know it. It’s been on my YouTube list ever since.

I met Mel and Jase at Walsall railway station and soon we were in Birmingham. The standard New Street hilarity of making people walk up the escalator was in full force again.

I was in a Paolo Nutini mood as two of his song lyrics were shaping things. “Hey, I put some new shoes on and suddenly everything’s right” and “I’m out and about, so I’m in with a shout.” I’d bought new shoes for a date but it got cancelled. Today seemed like a good time to give them their debut.

At Brindley Place I got caught in the tram door as I tried to alight. My Sliding Doors moment. Mrs Right could have been waiting on the platform at the next stop had I been stuck on the tram.

Once I’d freed myself we assessed options Jase refused Wetherspoons so we headed to The Brasshouse via the Ozzy Osborne bench. A nice man offered to take a pic. He was only in town as his son had been bitten by a dog the day before and was up to offer moral support.

In The Brasshouse Mel asked the barman to send Moyles round to us should he pop in. We headed outside and found a pleasant seat overlooking Brindley Place. Mel presented me with a cheese straw which was random, and pleasant in equal measures. The bloke on the next table didn’t hang around. He soon scarpered. I suspect because he didn’t get offered a cheese straw.

At Rosies, walking in I spotted a sign saying all drinks on a Saturday were £2 between 9pm and Midnight. I hoped this was in place during the day.

We were refused entrance to the back area despite having VIP tickets. I didn’t ask questions.

Tunes were already belting out with Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl” being the first arm raiser. I was loving it. At the start of this year I never thought that just after my 52nd birthday I’d be in a club on a Saturday afternoon dancing to Nicki Minaj and Ke$ha. I was however disappointed to be the only one in the place doing the lasooing to Gangnam Style.

There were dancefloor spillages – not by me I hasten to add. They were being quickly mopped up. Times have clearly changed. This would not have happened in Harleys during the 90s

I needed to send out some single and available man vibes – they kinda come as standard with me and losing the can of Coke Zero was also required. I wasn’t pulling a lovely lady with that in my hand.

First song that got me up the front dancing? “Cha Cha Slide.” Enjoyed it but the lass in front didn’t know her left from right which had me doubting myself. Also having to clutch my glasses case in my shirt pocket during the “5 hops this time” bit wasn’t a great look.

I got a round in. Yeah, the drinks were not £2 each.

Chris Moyles came on and opened with a dancey version of a Coldplay hit. His opening lines were “What a lovely day to be inside. It’s normally pissing down.” Initially I couldn’t see him due to a pillar. It was like being at Bescot Stadium when it first opened. Soon I had the great idea of moving slightly.

I tried to get some photos. I’m no David Bailey. Looking back at them on the night and it’s fair to say that there are pictures of the Loch Ness Monster that are clearer and less grainy.

I loved his “I’m gonna play a song you won’t have heard in years. You may have brought it on vinyl or cassette single.” I knew it straight away from the first note as did many other. “Get Up (Before The Night Is Over).” Technotronic featuring Ya Kid K. Yes I owned this single and the album on cassette. Arms in the air straight away. Fun fact, Ya Kid K also sang “Pump Up The Jam” even though it was credited as featuring Felly.

I was back by the bar for “Do you think I’m sexy?”  I eventually moved up top more in hope than expectation. Yeah, nobody thought I was.

On the way back from the toilets I was asked the question I get the most “are you a Walsall fan?” A bloke had recognised me and introduced himself. Bobby from Blakenall – nice to meet you.

Towards the end the day took a a slight downer when a couple of lads tried to take the piss out of me. I just gave them a “yeah alright mate” and walked away.

Towards the end he played “Sit Down.” Some did. I certainly didn’t. I’d have still been getting up at the end of the night.

Last song was CeeLo Green “Forget You”. I knew what F U actually meant but had never heard the non radio friendly version. Superb set and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Great patter from Chris throughout. Big thanks to Mel and Jase for letting mecrag along.

Apparently the trains had been playing up a bit but were starting to behave themselves when I got to New Street with one due with just enough time for me to tick off the new Greggs. Trying to get wallet out, remove day ticket and get through barrier whilst holding a large latte with a pack of popcorn chicken balanced on top was a challenge.

Back in Walsall and I opted to retick The Oak Inn on Green Lane which reopened the night before. I’d forgotten about the football but walked in just in time for the penalties. What an Earth was that run up about for the first missed Arsenal penalty?

Anyway the pub has new windows and carpets and looks great. There were a few in although a lot of these drifted away after the penalties. A dj took over and it’s moving away from the rock feel of the previous regime. The door to the toilet was closed which hasn’t happened in years. Nice to be able to wash my hands without the barstaff and punters being able to watch. Burnt cobs were available too. Nice to see the place back open and I wish them well.

On the way out I tried to get a picture of the place but there were people outside. I loitered across the road to see if they went in but they were having none of it. Next time. Maybe.

I headed to Katz and bumped into Adrian. First meet up since the epic Clinton Baptiste night. The band were doing a Beatles v Rolling Stones set. I didn’t hold out much hope for “She’s A Rainbow”, my favourite Stones but my fave “Beatles” one “Twist And Shout” did figure.

Adrian and I headed to the Walsall Arms. Even Clinton Baptiste couldn’t see that coming. Carla was on singing and started off with the Tina Turner version of “Proud Mary” which was epic. Adrian tried to buy me a drink but the card machine wouldn’t take the payment. Trying to buy me a non alcoholic drink must have flagged up as “suspicious activity.”

I got home about 11.45, knackered but happy. Cheers all for a great day.

Saturday 2nd of May. Last day of the football season for millions of fans. I’d have loved to have been at Bromley but despite nothing to play for, Walsall had sold out the away end and I couldn’t get a ticket. So I decided to get an all transport modes day ticket and go mooching about.

First though, McDonald’s. I needed a sausage and egg muffin with a toffee latte chaser. A strange thing happened within. They played “Hey Mickey” by Toni Basil. A song I detest and the bane of ny life as a kid. It’s probably why I still hate being called Mick or Mickey to this day. However, since November 2023 I’ve started to become happier and slightly more positive in my outlook on life. And I started to sing along. I shocked myself. It was a shame that the women on the next table didn’t join in as it could have looked like that scene from Wayne’s World. Turned out she was saving her vocals for the next song “Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This” which she joined in loudly. I didn’t.

In the Saddlers Centre, I got my first look at the new 3 Men In A Boat display. It looks good but that clock needs tearing down by an angry mob and replacing with one that displays 4 correctly – IV.

I got my day pass and hit the bus towards Darlaston. I wanted to tick off the new railway station. Other West Midlands social media content creators had visited straight away when it opened. Naturally I’m more relaxed about things like this.

When this station was proposed, along with the other newbie up the line at Willenhall, it was going to be on the reinstated Walsall to Wolverhampton service. However our transport overlords had a wobble, decided against reinstating said service and instead put these stations on the Birmingham to Shrewsbury line service to much disbelief and hilarity on social media.

I’m not too distraught. When Walsall to Wolvo was axed in 2008, I was a regular visitor to Wolvo, but now I go probably once a year. I do feel for people that use the 529 regularly though. The axing of the X529 express service was what made me finally leave SciChem after 22 years.

However when we play Shrewsbury (a) next season there should be a few drinking in The Globe on Darlaston Road then strolling to James Bridge for the train.

I hadn’t looked at timetables and as I approached, a train was pulling out in the direction I was hoping to travel. Oh well, time to mooch. The car park is massive. Very ambitious. Can’t see it ever being full. The lifts worked and didn’t stink of piss. I’m sure they will soon be brought in line with other West Midlands station lifts. The next train to Willenhall was an hour away. Bollocks to that. Would have been quicker to walk to Bentley and get the 529. Maybe. But the way I walk? Alright, no then.

A train to Birmingham however, was in 10 minutes. Ok. I’ll do the day in reverse.

At New Street, a tram came in straight away. I’d seen on Facebook that The Black Eagle in Hockley was closing on May 10th so opted to make one last visit.

On entry the barmaid was mid tirade about paying Council Tax. ” They want payment for the whole year up front. I aint doing that, I could be dead in July.” A level of pessimism I could certainly get on board with.

In the back room, much to my surprise and delight there was a cement mixer. I, like most folk would rather play with that than the pool table. There was a big hole at the front to put your 50p in. I didn’t have any change though.

I so must have looked like a doomed pub tourist. None  regular, clutching a bottle of Diet Coke and taking pictures. It was only my third visit. First time on pub Challenge 3 and second time when I was spotting birds through the medium of pub names (blog here). I know it’s a legendary pub and many will mourn its closing.

Back at Soho Benson Road, the tram came straight away. With a bit of thought most unlike me, rather than go back to the stop near Snow Hill and walking round to it, I jumped off at Jewellery Quarter and headed for the train to Stourbridge. It is my mission to meet George the Stourbridge Junction cat, and today seemed as good a day as any. He wasn’t about.

I jumped on Europe’s shortest branch line, with that amazing little people carrier train thing and was soon in actual Stourbridge. Previous missions here have been with Blackpool Jane but this was my first solo trip. Find a pub? Go on then. Jane was always in charge of directions so I didn’t know where I was going, couldn’t see a sign saying Town Centre so picked a road and started to walk.

I started to think I was going the wrong way but then a nice family with a pram stopped to let me pass. I thanked them but felt compelled to carry on walking so I did. 10 minutes later I looked around, there was no sign of them so I went into reverse and headed back whence I’d came.

Back at the bus station I saw a sign saying Town Centre stuck on the side of a bus stop so finally headed the right way.

I was pondering food in Wetherspoons but I saw Greggs first. At this juncture I must point out that I eat sensibly during the week. Yes I used the word sensibly rather than healthily on purpose. However on a Saturday, I let my albeit limited hair down and pig out. Into Greggs I headed.

The lass serving was great. Friendly and helpful. I grabbed chicken goujons and went for double cock action with the new chicken roll. Food in Greggs can be very hit and miss regarding temperature but the nice lady said the chicken rolls were just out of the oven. She offered dips for the goujons so I opted for mayo. She said I ought to have 2 as one wouldn’t be enough. She also said I should get the Greggs app. I promised I would. As,I write this 3 weeks later, I still haven’t and I probably won’t. Things in life that I have no need for number 1,267,087 – the Greggs app.

Food was great. Chicken roll was ace. I did only need the one mayo so I stuck the other in my pocket. I cannot waste mayo. My Belgian forefathers would never forgive me. Before I left I clocked something not seen before. A food waste bin in a takeaway. I absolutely do not waste food. Things I have no need for number 1,267,088.

Time was getting on so I decided to start heading back. Stourbridge Junction was rammed this time. I hoped they were all there to see George the cat and equality disappointed as me at his none appearance.

Rather than go back to Snow Hill, I opted to alight at Smethwick Galton Bridge in search of a New Street train as I still wanted to tick off Willenhall railway station.

Galton Bridge is odd. 4 platforms split over 2 levels. I’m easily confused and I think the architect had me in mind when designing it. A sign said platform 4 was offering a train to New Street. I couldn’t find it and ended up at platform 1. There I saw saw a train to Wolvo was arriving  at platform 3 so  dashed to that only to find it cancelled upon arrival.

I eventually found platform 4, got to New Street and was looking for a train to Wolvo then saw the one to Shrewsbury via Willenhall was in 4 minutes.

I dashed to the red zone passing a little kid who was singing “if you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands.” He applied the claps too. I took it he didn’t know the Walsall score – we’d lost.

Willenhall railway station seemed very familiar. Reminded me of another one but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

I had a pleasant wander around Willenhall and earmarked a couple of places for a review then popped to The Crown.

A couple of the drink fonts had post it notes on them saying out of stock. More pubs should do this. As I walked from the bar, the new song by sombr “12 to 12” came on. The line “in a room full of people, I look for you”was a bit odd as at that point I was the sole customer but as a great pub I knew I’d have fellow punters soon and so it proved. Two guys that sat at the next table greeted me like old friends.

I headed home, totally getting caught in a rainstorm. I changed, grabbed a cuppa and on the night headed to the Walsall Arms. My old pal Wayne Swift was performing. I’ve only seen him sing once before, a few years ago and it’s fair to say I was twatted that night so it was nice to be seeing him, in a state where I’d be able to remember it.

I’d missed the first half, it’s not just Walsall games where I do this.  Wayne was on good form. Highlights were “Losing My Religion” – the song that changed my musical path in life and also “Town Called Malice”, “Baggy Trousers” and Erasure’s classic “Stop.” Great set Wayne and I promise I won’t leave it so long to see you next time.

Great day. I think I got value out of my day ticket and I want to use the close football season to have more adventures.

Three Sugars. 57 Liskeard Road, Park Hall, Walsall, WS5 3EY. Reviewed 23/04/26.

It was St George’s Day, and I was buoyant having finally dropped below the 11 stone weight level earlier in the week. Sounded like a cause for double celebration. It’s now tradition that I shout breakfast for Josh on St George’s Day, and left it down to him, to pick the venue. He found this place online, I’d never heard of it so it was motion carried.

Most unlike me, I’d tried to find a menu online but failed. I’d even tried two different search engines – check me being down with the technology. Josh thought it seemed more coffee shop but had seen breakfast mentioned. I was just hoping I could pay by card – which I normally don’t like to do. I had planned to use the cashpoint on the way to the gym the night before but this had hit a major snag when I sacked off the gym after work.

Our entrance was delayed by a discussion about SDS drills. I’m not really a manly man so he was shocked that I knew what one was. My 10 years at Corroy Products certainly were not wasted.

We ventured in. I fannied around taking a picture while he marched off to ask the important questions, “do you do breakfasts and do you take card?” Yes on both counts.

We ordered, the lady seemed slightly confused at Josh saying I could have his egg and me saying he could have my tomatoes but we got there. Josh grabbed the Frustration game and began to set it up. I’d played it as a kid but that was like centuries ago. It seemed a bit more complex now with the addition of a genie. Josh was like “come on Evo, we can do this. It’s aimed at 5 year olds.”

For a kids game it got surprisingly competitive. He called me a “petulant child” and the c bomb during the proceedings. Doubt I’d win a slander case as there would be a plethora of people willing to testify that he was being totally factual on both counts. Josh won the game, but we won’t go too in-depth into that. You came here for a food review, not a Radio 5 Live style match report. Oh yeah, the food review? Let’s crack on.

Josh poured the tea. Nice of him to be mom – well he is the parent out of the two of us. I asked “are you going to have Three Sugars to be corporate?” He gave a very flat no. In the car afterwards he admitted he hadn’t clocked the reference.

The food, with an English Breakfast Tea each (Josh said he’d never heard of this) came to £20. It really winds Josh up how I eat my food and this was to be no exception, as I cut into the last remaining plated item, one of the eggs with the bowl of beans still intact he said “oh no, you’re not going to eat the beans on their own?” Yep. I had the beans last, picking the bowl up and eating them with a fork. He said “I can just about cope with how you eat things in order but this? I don’t think our friendship can survive this.” Bit dramatic. That’s normally my job.

Anyway the food was good although I think they had one eye on the electricity bill as the toaster appeared to have been used for the bare minimum of time. Josh enjoyed the food and said the English Breakfast Tea was “alright.” He should have perked it up with 3 sugars.

I didn’t clock the radio station that was on but we had “High Hopes” by Panic At The Disco, an absolute classic and also “Pink Pony Club” earning Chappell Roan yet another mention in this blog. I think she owes me everything.

Anyway, a decent visit. Josh doesn’t know this yet but we are playing Monopoly next time. That will give them a chance to cook the toast properly.

***UPATE!! The Three Sugars closed down this week, due to the end of their lease.***

Field Road Fish Bar – 112 Field Road, Bloxwich, WS3 3JB. Reviewed 09/05/26.

So the friendship between Josh and I had just about survived the beans incident at 3 Sugars and one day in May he had very kindly been driving me around Blakenall and Bloxwich so I could take old pub pictures for this former boozer blog. As a thank you I offered to buy chippy takeaway for him and his family. We had proposed George’s but when we saw this place he mentioned that it’s Mrs Josh’s favourite chippy. I suggested we go there instead as I’ve been past it millions of times but never been in.

He ventured in while I ambled across the road to take pictures. As I entered, the guy serving was straight away asking what I wanted. I panicked, glanced up at the menu and just went for large fish and chips. 

Josh, now stood against the back wall said he’d sorted his and Lyndsey’s food but could I sort the kids. No probs. So I was in the gap between him and the counter, he said chips so I asked for size and number of bags etc and relayed this to the man serving. It reminded me of playing Chinese Whispers at school. A game I was shit at. It was lucky the kids didn’t end up with just a roe and a roll of lino.

With the food ordered I could finally peruse the surroundings. The counter has a big plastic screen with two small gaps in for ordering chips, roe or rolls of lino. Not sure if they couldn’t be arsed to take the screen down after Covid or they are being super prepared for any upcoming Hantavirus pandemic.

The menu then. You can have a salad tray for £2.50 which I was delighted to have missed out on. They do a battered beef burger. I’d have been all over that, the battered mushrooms less so. I probably would have had the mixed meat naan at £8.90 given the chance to ponder.  

The other customer in the shop moved revealing a hand written sign offering spicy hot wings, tucked away on a door. That may have been a goer.  

Back at Josh’s I gave him most of the chips and some to his extremely mad dog Max, who it’s fair to say is my bezzie mate in the animal kingdom.

The chips were ok, I wasn’t too sure about them. I didn’t sample any before delegating them in Josh’s direction. The fish was massive though and really good. 

Did Josh and the family enjoy their food? Dunno. Didn’t ask because I’m a nob. 

Decent enough visit though.

Blondies Cafe – 33 The Precinct, Lucknow Road, Short Heath, Willenhall WV12 4PZ.

It was my birthday. I’d offered to shout breakfast for Josh if he’d drive me somewhere. I’d never heard of Blondies until Robert Stanley shared one of their Facebook posts where you could win a breakfast for sharing it. Fair play to him. He won it. I considered sharing it myself but thought it would look rubbish winning a breakfast at a cafe I’d never set foot in while regulars missed out. Imagine if that surfaces when I become Mayor.

I had a peruse of their Facebook posts before departure. They sign off most of them with “love ya, bye.” Not sure if they were fans of Scott Mills before his sacking but as we don’t get to hear him say that anymore, it made me smile to see it there.

We found it easily enough. I was reluctant to vacate the car as my 2nd favourite Ellie Goulding song “Love Me Like You Do” had just come on the radio. Had it been “The Writer” I would have sat it out. Fortunately, upon getting inside, they’d got the same station on so I got some Ellie goodness whilst perusing the menu.

There was a friendly welcome and the orders were being input into a computer which was a new one on me. Josh ordered large breakfast and was asked  if he wanted swaps. He asked if he could swap his eggs for a sausage. This was declined. He negotiated a hash brown and extra beans instead. He later called the sausage request a “computer says no” moment. He says that Swill and I look like David Walliams and Matt Lucas so never misses the chance to make a Little Britain reference.

I also went large with no tomatoes or mushrooms. I was asked about swaps but I’m crap at haggling so didn’t enter negotiations. Shades of Life Of Brian “this bloke won’t haggle.” It came to £20.60 for two large breakfasts with teas included.

We moved into the back room. There was an array of colouring books and pencils. Nice to consider if the usual laddie conversation between us dried up.

I gave the menu another study. They do The 666 Breakfast Challenge which is £25 (no details of contents). Free if completed in 25 minutes. They way I eat I’d probably be on the first or second item at full time, or still taking pictures of it. Josh however, who eats like he thinks it’s going to be taken off him shortly would have it demolished in 5 minutes and have time to complete two of the colouring books.

The teas came first and Josh said his “hit the spot.” There was a little nod to us not being regulars though as our teas were served in plain white mugs while the lads on the next table got Blondies branded ones. However with white being my favourite colour, I was fine with this.

Josh gave me his black pudding which was thoroughly decent of him and I got an unexpected extra pot of beans as I didn’t have tomatoes which was nice. They made it out of the pots so not repeat of beansgate from 3 Sugars.

The breakfasts were great. We both really enjoyed them. Well worth every penny. Proper filling. You come out of some cafes wondering when dinnertime is but here I was thinking ‘I don’t need to eat till tonight.’ I shall be sharing any future “win a breakfast” Facebook posts.

The setting was great, the atmosphere cheerful and lively and the toilet was clean with complimentary hygiene products provided. Plus a square toilet. I love a square toilet.

Music was standard Heart FM fayre. Slightly disappointed we didn’t get any songs by Blondie to go with the cafes name. “Maria” would have gone down a storm, so I played it when I got home.

Great visit this, cheers Rob for bringing the place to my attention. Blondies – love ya bye. Be back soon.

Bank Holiday weekend got off to an unusual start. Asps and I were going to see B*Witched in Worcester Cathedral. I wasn’t initially sure when he first asked. Had I been on Popmaster and Ken Bruce asked me for 3 in 10 from B*Witched, I’d have smashed it. I’d have shown off and got 5 but that’s it. But 5 is 3 more songs than I knew when I saw The Twang for the first time and it’ll be the 4th time for them later this year, and it’s always good to do something different so I agreed. I took straight to YouTube to watch the “Jesse Hold On” video as that’s my favourite.

I saw a message from Asps at dinnertime with event info. It said “we will be operating a strict dress code of smart casual. Effort is required.” I’ve never known dress restrictions for a gig before and I”d got my change of clothes with me so was committed to it. I’d been on a 15 pub crawl of Worcester back in 2011, so I knew that there was plenty of options should I be refused entry.

Asps had decided on a more wacky theme for his outfit and had brought hats too. A Mexican one and a cow girl. I got to choose. I went Mexican. I’ve walked past the boxes of Old El Paso in supermarkets so I think I qualify.

Asps had purchased a B*Witched cd previously and listened to it. He’d done his home work. Me, like so often in my school days – hadn’t. We had it on in the car and it was a pleasant drive down the M5 and we were soon in Worcester. Asps had a Wetherspoons in mind for tea but as we passed a place I spotted a Space Invaders machine in the window and a glance in revealed more goodness. We entered Retroids Arcade Bar excitedly.

There was a row of pinball machines and much to my surprise and delight my favourite The Addams Family was there. Motion carried. Not played it in about 3 years, so I was a bit rusty with the first ball but the second? My God I hit everything. Two extra balls, jackpot, reply and points galore. Roger Daltrey would have been very impressed.

Downstais I found Pac-Man and gave that a blast. It’s the only time I eat fruit to be fair. The joystick was bit stiff so I only got to sample cherry and strawberry this time but it was still great playing.

We headed to Wetherspoons but en route we spotted a sign in a window declaring “stunning chicken” or something like that so we headed in there. I spotted on the B*Witched message from earlier that we had to be in the cathedral by 7.45, and it was now 7.15. Asps went up to order and we both had the Levant Legend burger and there was a choice of sauce. Asps just picked something at random. If I’d had to choose we would have missed the show.

With time against us I couldn’t fanny about removing stuff off the burger but it was bloody great. Probably the best chicken burger I’ve ever had. Asps had some sort of cauliflower side which he offered me some of, which I was more than happy to decline. I didn’t write down the name of the place OTTO but remembered it by thinking of The Simpsons character. Cracking visit and the lady serving/waitressing was great too.

Whilst awaiting the food, Asps had got talking to some ladies outside, also in hats, also going to the gig. He told them he was with a Mexican and came back in to summons me to join them. We had a group photo. Asps asked what the main ladies name was “Carlin” she replied. “What like the beer?” He asked. I’d thought Carlin out of the film Scum. Different levels eh.

We approached the cathedral just after the curfew so missed the queues but were spotting by the B*Witched social media creator who asked if he could film us walking in. We absolutely agreed and I gave my ticket a wave ala Wayne & Garth in Wayne’s World when they get to meet Alice Cooper.

It was surreal walking in. I’d been to see Clinton Baptiste at Walsall Arena the night before but straight away this was a different vibe. Never been to a gig in a religious premises before. We were shown to our seats, I was slightly disappointing the lady didn’t say “take a pew.” The support act was on. Natalie Abel. This was another first, seeing the support. She was really good. Asps described her as looking like Pixie Lott and singing like Duffy. Good comparisons on both counts. She held this one note so well, I started to fear for the stained glass windows.

With her set nearly up we went to explore and found the bar. Loads of women about and they had heeded the warning of making an effort with the outfits. I had the occasional lustful thought. I could have done with finding the confessional booth, although had I done so, my list of sins would have had to be unfurled like a parchment.

The bar was a pop up jobbie. Canon Taylor at St Mary’s The Mount in Walsall missed a trick here. He could have had one in church and sold Communion Wine. He’d have made a killing and not needed to pass the collection plate round. Anyway, I had planned to bring a bottle of water in with me to see if anyone was about that could turn it into wine, but that lunch time message from Asps had stated no outside drinks to be brought in.

As the interval came to end, I nipped to the loo. This was some distance from our seats and took longer than I expected to make the round trip. Asps enquired where I’d been. “I thought the vicar had got hold of you” he followed up with.

I made the start and they opened with “Rollercoaster.” Great song and within the first 4 songs we’d had three of the 5 I know the others being “Jesse Hold On” and “Blame It On The Weatherman” There were some random covers thrown in like Wilson Phillips “Hold On”, Carly Simon’s “Coming Around Again” and the theme tune from Friends. Never watched a second of that show, but I did by the cd single when The Rembrandts released it as I love the song. There were new songs too. Given the surroundings though, they could have thrown in a hymn or two. “Colours Of Day” would have gone down an absolute storm.

I think this was the first gig I’ve been to that didn’t have alcohol being thrown around although the Sophie B. Hawkins one (detailed here) may also have been like this.

Towards the end we had “To You I Belong” my second favourite, and at 9.50, with the show due to finish at 10 I decided to run for the loo, so I could be back for the finale. Despite knowing the way back, I decided to follow a bloke who didn’t. Plus my timing was off again. The were well into C’est La Vie their biggest hit when I returned. I’d even missed them mixing it up with a bit of Ed Sheeran in the middle apparently but they extended it and I got to hear a good section of it. No encore so we were outside by 9.56 and heading for the car park.

As we hadn’t hung around we were second off the car park, as hoards were just getting back. We were slightly delayed as the bloke in the car in front was in no hurry earning him a “come on George” from me.

We thought the journey home would be plain sailing. Not quite. Our transport overlords had other ideas. They’d shut the M5 at Junction 4. Now I don’t know much about the M5 bar basic destinations, but as a kid Beacon Radio’s travel man was obsessed with M5 junctions 4 & 5, so I remember them being Lydiate Ash and Droitwich respectively. Never thought I’d ever get off at one of them though. So we had a pleasant drive through south Birmingham. This gave Asps the chance top introduce me to the album of Ava Max. I’d never heard of her but liked it. Anyone with a song called “Sweet But Psycho” is alright in my book.

We saw some right dodgy driving though. I used to watch Road Wars on Sky 3 of a Friday night, and some of the manoeuvres we saw would not have looked out of place on that show. To think I failed my two driving tests for very flimsy reasons, but I could (and probably still can) drive a lot better than some of the folk out and about that evening.

There was more travel bosses hilarity to come though as we came through the city centre to find the Aston Expressway also closed. I was glad I’d had that cheeky toilet before we left.

Cracking night. Asps classed it as my birthday present so paid for the tickets, food and drink et al. Cheers Asps. As I type this, it’s pissing down outside. I’ll Blame It On The Weatherman.

As I may have mentioned occasionally, my favourite Duran Duran song is New Moon On Monday. When Walsall played Crawley away in October my mate and owner of the superb Eclipse Records in The Crossing At St Paul’s by the bus station in Walsall, the mega cool Pete Holland checked into a pub there called The New Moon. This gave me an idea. It took all of two seconds for me to be Googleing pubs called New Moon. Nearest one is in Tottenham. Fine. I just needed a Monday. Easter Monday would suffice.

This was my second trip to London of the Easter break. I’d missed 3 hours of the previous jaunt – The Back To The Future show blog visit, so I thought I’d throw in the trip to Camden that I’d had to miss that day due to the trains, and also get some more Monopoly properties ticked off too. An action packed day.

I decided to go by coach to make it cheaper. Good job as unbeknown to me at the time of booking, Euston was closed as they like to cause maximum bank holiday inconvenience. Departure time was early so I hoped MaccieD’s would be open at 7am so I could get in. I remembered May bank holiday last year and Walsall FC going to Wembley and the “24 hour” Maccies by Tesco being closed before I got the train so I prayed for a better result this time but did pop a sandwich into my man bag in case of emergency.

Thankfully the Park Street store was open and I was the first customer. It was nice to see order number 001 on the screen. Not often I have 1st against my name so I’ll take that. Bit of an odd visit with an impatient customer getting fed up, going behind the counter to helped himself and then walking out. My food was delicious and as Lent was over I had my first toffee latte in a good while. Was it worth the wait? Not really being truthful but the double sausage and egg McMuffin – which had not been given up for Lent I can assure you, was amazing.

On my Eastcote to Theydon Bois day last year (blog here) the coach had stopped at Golders Green. I asked the driver if this one would and he confirmed it would. I asked if I could jump off there instead of Victoria and he said “of course you can, I wont hold you hostage.” I laughed and said “nobody would pay the ransom.” I like to get a bit of negativity out there before midday.

This was my first time of catching the coach in Walsall and it’s a God send. Cuts out out a bit of fannying around and I got the choice of unreserved seats. At Birmingham the coach filled. It was practically full but nobody wanted to sit by me. I was fine with this. At Golders Green I jumped off the coach, sought the driver who was unloading cases, thanked him and shook his hand. I then stepped into the sun. This was epic. I think vampires see the sun more than me. It was such a good feeling that Brothers In Rhythm would have been jealous.

Last time I alighted at Golders Green, I spotted Bar Linda. I was intrigued but had pressed on. This time though, I was venturing in. It’s not a “proper” bar as there didn’t appear to be booze on sale, but I only needed a latte anyway. Syrups for the coffee were available but not offered. The staff at The Light Cinema would not have missed this opportunity. It was friendly enough and I was impressed with the lady behind me who bought one samosa and paid by card. I grabbed my drink and sat in the back to remind myself of my route for plan b.

Plan b was Northern Line to Moorgate. As per usual I was beaming on my way to the platform. Within minutes I was on my way. Now, I try not to swear on this blog, like the approach I have to day to day life, but I’ve got to say Moorgate is fucking odd. Long sprawling walkways, lifts with diagrams and on the platform there was only maps of the whole lines, rather than just where you were and what stations were next from the platform like you get at other stations. The directions were dealing in East and West but when doing my Circle Line research it had been all about the clockwise and anti.

A train pulled in so I decided to hop on. I normally like a good half hour to make a decision but I had a minute here. I had a 50/50 chance. I was only going one station anyway, be it correctly to Liverpool Street or incorrectly to Barbican. The doors closed “Next station is Barbican.” Mildly irritating but not too much of a bother. Fortunately Barbican had its shit together and I knew straight away which platform went where in that place.

At Liverpool Street I needed a ticket for the train. I went to use the machine. It said if I’d already travelled by TFL that day it might be cheaper to just tap in and out through the barriers so I opted to do that. What a top machine. When the war against the machines starts, I might ask Sarah Connor if we can spare that one.

I had to get the Weaver Line, one of the ones that was renamed earlier this decade. I know not where the name comes from but I’d like to think it is named after Jackie Weaver. “You have no authority on this train Jackie Weaver.”

Soon I was at Bruce Grove and walking towards Tottenham. I’d put a red shirt on that morning then remembered where I was going. Tottenham play in white, my favourite colour so I made the last minute decision to iron my white shirt. And I was still the first customer in MaccieD’s.

I found Lordship Lane (what a great name) easily enough and was soon in The New Moon. Eminem “Lose Yourself” was playing which gave way to Righteous Brothers “Unchained Melody”, a segway I’ve not encountered before. As I sat there enjoying the music (they didn’t play New Moon On Monday. Must have missed it), I’d had a bit of a mission just for a bottle of Diet Coke but the blog title box had been ticked and I was happy with that.

To speed things up I caught the bus back to Bruce Grove. Another box ticked. First trip on a red London bus. I was in a queue at the stop and saw a bus at the junction down the road. Everyone in the queue got up and shuffled forwards and I did likewise. Then the bus turned left. I turned into Nessa from Gavin & Stacey and gave a loud “oh!” This prompted everyone in the queue to turn around and look at me. Fair play to the lad in front who tried to explain. “It’s doing the 123” he said. Whilst I appreciated him trying to clarify things, he might as well have sang “Vienna” as this meant nothing to me. At this point can I crack my favourite Midge Ure joke? I’m playing Scrabble with Midge Ure. I’ve got 4 letters left but they mean nothing to me O V N R.

Back at Liverpool Street I needed my Monopoly board signing. I’d brought a pen along specially for this but as I reached into my bag, having to rummage past the empty latte cup from Linda’s and equally empty Tesco sandwich packet, two books and the board itself, I found the mass of pens at the bottom. But couldn’t find the one I’d earmarked for signing. I started to flap and dropped pens on the concourse. Then the nice lady I asked at the tourist information desk refused to sign gesturing that he colleague would, and he did. As I walked away I found the pen in my coat pocket. On the Underground I noticed on the front of the man bag some slots for pens to go in that I could have used. I’ve only had the bag since 2009, not long enough to notice these sort of things.

Onto Camden then. Camden is such a thriving and cool place. I felt the vibe as soon as I left the station.

There was music, people filming interviews, and a kind of band in the middle of the road. I didn’t ask if they’d paid the congestion charge. I’d done Camden before with Mase and Sean in 2018 but that visit was before Baby Reindeer became a thing. The Hawley Arms, Amy Winehouse’s local was busy. I was looking around and really should have had a neon sign on my head saying “tourist.” Actually, I didn’t need that it must have been obvious.

The plan was to grab a coke and sit at the bar like Martha (the character who stalks the barman) in the show but a bloke had already got that nailed down and the other spare stool was right next to him. I sat at a table and perused the menu. As a starter they do a pint of chips for £6. Brings a different meaning to the phrase “going out for a few pints?”

I couldn’t see any reference to Baby Reindeer in there and a Google search since revealed that the staff are fed up of people going in asking about it. Glad I didn’t. I did peruse to to see who I thought Martha might be, but nobody fitted what I had in mind as what she looked like. Shame that the main man from the show wasn’t there. I’d have asked for some tips on becoming a stand up comedian. I am about to start writing my “difficult” second stand up show after the first one went down well. I won’t use the Midge Ure joke that night.

I had one drink and headed to The Worlds End. This place made my top 10 list on Pub Challenge 3 (blog here) so I was eager for a revisit. The building was covered in scaffolding so I couldn’t get a picture and had me wondering if it was closed but I found the entrance. Card only in here which sparked a discussion with a fellow customer – my only one of the day. He agreed that cash is king.

Music wasn’t to my taste in either pub but it was two good visits. I’d love to have a proper day in Camden, amble around a bit, visit the market and my mate Chris Kelly says that the TV AM egg cups that appeared at the end of the show are still located in Camden so it would be cool to see those. That’s for another day though as time was pressing on and I still had another mission.

On the tube when we got to Mornington Crescent, a lad suddenly got up and bolted to the doors but had left it too late and they shut as he got to them. Very Sliding Doors. He skulked back to his seat as I gave him the nickname Gwyneth Paltrow.

I alighted at Green Park Underground station via the wrong exit and was greeted by the sight of a park which it’s fair t say was green. Still no idea how the station got its name though. I walked around the front and hit Piccadilly. I saw The Ritz with my own eyes for the first time. Now whilst doing this Monopoly mission, it is my aim to stay at a hotel on one of the properties – not in the jail.

I mentioned this to my work colleague Tom a couple of days later and wondered if a room at The Ritz might be about £200. He checked. More like a grand and half. Hmmmm to stay there I would need to set up a crowd fund page, an only fans and get to level 7 genius on Booking.com. I could ask if I could sleep in a store cupboard but I’m guessing that any stay there would be in the smallest room and I probably won’t be accommodating a bevvy of beauties that night. I could mention that I’m a lightly regarded Walsall blogger and offer them some very limited exposure for a free room. I do have a reputation for staying in cheap hotels so this would be a shock for my friends.

I passed a restaurant called Sexy Fish. I often refer to my food as sexy so this appealed to me. I guess I might have to start checking my lottery tickets though before I think about going there.

Back in 2017 I had an odd incident that saw me wandering aimlessly around London all night and at about 3am I saw The Coach & Horses, London’s narrowest pub. I vowed at that point that I would visit it one day. Only taken me 9 years to get round to it. Things don’t happen quickly in my life. A bottle of Diet Coke was only £4.95. I say “only” but I was expecting much worse for Mayfair. Even my debit card didn’t believe it and had to be presented twice. The nice barmaid was happy to sign my board and it was a good visit. I didn’t go to the loo though which is still bugging me. Probably gold plated taps and a man in a top hat and tails offering after shave sprays.

I had meant to tick off Park Lane but time was pressing on, and thinking how long it took me to find the coach station from the tube at Victoria last time I headed back. I’m far too cautious for my own good, and outside the tube a nice lady in a hat directed me so i was at the coach station an hour early.

So that day I only got two ticks in and I’d wanted 4 and I’m now 5 down on where I wanted to be. I’ll just have to keep going back. I had planned to go this Friday but there is a tube strike which has proper pissed on my bonfire and my cornflakes. There is many things in life that there is no need for and piss on your cornflakes is one of them. I’ll just boost the Walsdall economy instead that day. I’ve not done enough of that of late.

Coach was empty on the way back. Nobody in my half of the coach which was a bit eerie. Toilet was out of action too which made for an anxious uncomfortable last hour. Back in Walsall and I saw my favourite taxi driver by the bus station. We were glad to see each other. I accepted his offer and I was glad to be home.

London, you were a blast. It only cost £20 for all that tube travel, two train and a bus journey – can’t argue at that. See you soon.

Thanks for reading as always. Blog us going on hiatus for a month or so now so speak soon yeah.

On March 28th, Blackpool Jane made a pilgrimage down to Walsall so a catch and a wander had to be done.

Strolling into town and yet again I had strange thoughts in my head. This time I was pondering if the band Texas ever played in said state and I wondered what the biggest country that Big Country gigged in. The gale force wind was bringing a chill with it that was cutting me in half so I needed something to take my mind off it. As I type this just over a week later, I still haven’t found out either answer, and being totally honest, I probably won’t look into it.

I know I tend to leave things to the last minute, or even later if I can and I was up to it again here. Jane’s train was due in at 9.57. I got down to the platform and the sign said it was 9.56.13. I had over half a minute to spare. Tut tut. I could have walked ever so slightly slower Anyway the train came in straight away and off we set.

We had to negotiate the carnage that is Walsall Council’s latest scheme with the top half of the Saddlers Centre now closed off along with shops on Park Street fenced off for demolition. As a result access to Jack & Ada’s is restricted and has been for a couple of months despite not a single brick being removed in the demolition process. Had it been a popular pub they’d have probably started flattening it while the last customer was finishing his pint. Or her pint obviously.

So we finally made it to Jack & Ada’s going through the bus station. We’d certainly got our steps in for the day and worked up an appetite. Paul was on his usual good form and welcoming. I couldn’t move in there for people I know with Beth & Mase, Claire Hendy and Phil and also Steve Winsper who was en route to Coventry Beer Festival. A fest that Jane and I attended back in the day along with Craig and we reminisced about playing Human Jukebox there. Where one of us picked a song and who the jukebox was gong to be to perform it. That person then got to pick the next song and singer. Needless to say I came up with this game after several hours on the booze.

Music was excellent which is standard for there. Baby I Love You by The Ramones and “let’s hang on, to what we got, don’t let go girl we got a lot” – I know not the artist or actual title of that one but they were the songs of the visit. We discussed theatre shows. We’ve so change. Don’t think this has ever cropped up in our conversations before. We’ve become cultured She’s going to see Avenue Q in London and I am so jealous. When I saw it I laughed so loudly, people at the front were turning round.

Food was great. Jane had requested a poached egg and commented that it looked like a tissue. As a male, I don’t need food looking like a tissue so I’m glad I stuck with fried.

We headed to The Pretty Bricks, Kev of BCA fame was serving and declared he was in a Human League mood and we got some classics.

I needed to put lottery on as it was a “must win” draw and I only play it nowadays when it’s one of those. I asked Jane to pick a number and she came up with 49 and asked if she would get a sixth of the winnings which I happily agreed to. I did warn her though that it takes me around 6 months to check my tickets. I like them to relax a bit before I check them but did advise she could be in for an unexpected windfall in November, just in time for a boost to the Bonfire Night budget.

I also bought a pack of Wine Gums. Don’t know why but I don’t like going into a shop and just buying a lottery tickets. Feels like I’m wasting the staffs time. She thought I was buying them to smuggle them into the cinema later but I always keep a pack of them at home and sometimes have a couple as a little treat when I’ve had a goof session of writing. Which is why my previous packet lasted decades.

We headed to the BCA. We sat upstairs and I got some very welcome Sun on my shoulder whilst getting to watch the sign swinging in the wind which was quite relaxing to observe out the corner of my eye. We talked all sorts in here. A good chunk being Walsall of old from when she used to live here and recalled fondly those nudey spot the difference games that you had on machines in The Fitters and The Trough. I don’t think they’d be allowed in today’s society.

Jane said she liked my glasses case. Bit left field but I don’t get many compliments so I gobbled this one up.

We moved on. We marvelled at a man at the top of Goodall Street that ignored the no entry and one way street signs/road markings and roared down it the wrong way. I don’t mind a bit of low level civil disobedience although ignoring the “hot chocolate is no longer allowed on the free refills” sign in Wetherspoons is abut my limit. I’ve only done this once Mr Martin if you’re reading.

At Katz Jane decided to try the no alcohol Guinness and for a laugh I decided to join her. I’ve only been given non alcoholic beer once before and that was in London in 2009 when someone accidentally gave me a Becks “blue”. This was quickly returned. I got Woza to change it as I don’t like to complain. Katz also had an array of burnt top cobs so I dived on a cheese and black pudding for later. I didn’t really get the burn cob thing to start with but now appreciate they are good.

I’d asked Jane in the week if she knew of any decent tourist attractions on any of the Monopoly board properties that I could visit. Unfortunately Jane doesn’t know the board. She found a London CAMRA magazine and started calling out suggestions of bars to see if they were on the board. It became like a London version of Monty Python’s Cheese Shop sketch. “Edgeware Road?” “No.” “Great Portland Street?” “No.” “Portobello Road?” “No.” Finally she hit upon Bow Street and as I didn’t manage to visit said street on Back To The Future day (read all about it here) as I’d planned, I still have that info on my phone.

I didn’t quite know what to make of the Guinness 0.0. Jane split the G without realising. My attempt didn’t quite work. Guess I’m not making it as a TikTok star doing that then.

We’d had 60/70’s music in the cafe, 80’s in The Bricks and now we were in the 90’s and Jase had a class playlist on the go with Sleeper’s Sale Of The century being just pushed out by McAlmont & Butler’s Yes as “Song Of The Visit”. I’m only mentioning these songs as I tend to play them as I type these blogs.

Upon leaving Katz and walking down Intown Row, Jane was in front and walking in the road. I said to get on the pavement and she pointed out it was a one way street with it coming our way so she could see if anything came. Good job our friend from Goodall Street wasn’t in the vicinity.

The wind wasn’t letting down and turning the corner by Tesco we suddenly had the gale at our backs and it nearly blew me into the curry house, which wouldn’t have been the worst result.

I’d suggested Royal Punjab as it opens earlier than the others. We got a warm welcome and were shown to a table. We asked for 3 poppadoms and got 5. Glad it’s not just me that is shit at counting. They weren’t messing around with the food though. Our curries were out before I’d had a couple of nibbles of the second poppadom.

There were two big groups of ladies and there was birthday celebrations in one group. They sang Happy Birthday so of course I joined in. I pushed on and started to sing the “go out and get drunk” second verse till I realised I was on my own and quickly stopped. Two of the ladies in the other group turned round and laughed when I sneezed loudly twice in quick succession.

Food was great. Quickly demolished. Despite the extra poppadoms Jane stuck to just having the one she’d ordered so I tried to plough through the rest but had to admit defeat. Great visit though. 3rd time here and always good. I first reviewed it back in 2022 and you can read that here.

There was still a bit of time before Jane’s train so we went to The Red Lion. Back to the 80s for the music (Happy Hour, Echo Beach and Prince Charming amongst others) and it was busy. Always a good visit, I just wish they’d open the upstairs again. I miss going up that spiral staircase and people watching down on the street below.

A man came up alongside and asked if I wanted any “mens perfume.” I didn’t know they did perfume for men so I politely declined.

Train time and I made my clompiest walk down the stairs ever. So noisy. I blamed the weight of the cob from Katz which was still in my pocket. Everyone must have thought I’d got heavy boots on, but no just my normal shoes.

With Jane safely on the train I headed to The Light Cinema to watch “They Will Kill You.” Up The Junction by Squeeze was playing as I walked in. It had truly been an outstanding afternoon of music.

Anyway, to try and get full use of my Light Cinema monthly membership I’m trying to go 26 times in 2026, and this was visit 20 despite not going once in January. – Late edit, It’s visit 23 tonight for Undertone and 24 tomorrow for California Schemin’ .

Film was ok but once over I headed home. I was going to go Walsall Arms for the retro disco but it had been a long day and I opted to get out of the wind. Cheers Jane for a great day. My turn to head north next time.