The cover for the Hard-Fi single Living For The Weekend features a clock showing 18.00 hours which I’ve always thought was a bit late but again it was around this time when my weekend could begin and after the standard order in McDonalds it was off to The Lyndon to meet Craig and from there we headed to Black Country Arms.
It was a bit lively upstairs so for the 2nd pint (blood orange cider after a green pint of Stonehenge Sign Of Spring) we headed for the part of the pub I call the Study. In here we found a joke book which Craig read from. I also chipped in with some of my favourite jokes like”a skeleton walks into a pub and says can I have a pint of lager and a mop please?”.
From there we headed to The Lounge (formally Pen & Wig) which was re-opening that day. It is now a desi pub serving food and there were a few folk in which was good to see. On our last visit 3 days after Christmas 2019 it was just me, Craig and the landlord in there and it was still playing festive music which was odd.
As we hadn’t gone back upstairs in The BCA to use the loo before departing we both needed it here. Craig dashed in first whilst I got on with the important business of ordering the drinks. And then I dashed to the bogs.
I entered to find a bothered Craig having trouble washing his hands. He challenged me to get some water out of the taps. Upon finishing the matters arising I walked to the sink, used the left tap and it flowed freely. I don’t know what it is with Craig but he brings out my mainly dormant competitive side. With wet hands to prove my victory I bypassed the hand dyer and went out and flicked excess water at him. Had it been anyone else I’d have acted like my 48 years and just used the dryer.
There were food and drink menus to peruse. Cocktails include Strawberry Is Sexy and Sex On The Sofa. I might try those and in the latter case I might get round to having the drink at some point too. The food is the usual desi pub fayre. They do an amazing sounding mega deal which costs £49.95. I announced that next time I win £50 on a scratchcard, I’m having that. Craig mentioned that it was surely a meal for 4. “Fine” I replied. “I’ll bring Patsy Kensit, you bring Lucy Verasamy”. I didn’t think to check if he knows who Lucy is but either way I’ll have a flirt with her while he is at the bar.
From there it was The Registry then Katz. On the retro gaming machine we have found Super Pac-Man which is an a odd version of the original game with un-lockable sections and power pills which makes your man go all big and he can do what he wants for a bit. We had three games. I won one, Craig wiped the floor with me in the other two, so I’m putting this bit of the report second and hoping you don’t notice. He made some great scores and as usual drunk me was a bit blase with my Pac-Man. We headed to Blue Ginger to round the night off which is standard behaviour and it was ace. Also standard.
On the Saturday I was up early to head to work. I glanced ruefully at the railway bridge. Two hours later I should have been passing over it on a wacky one night trip to Kent rather than walking under it at an un Godly time to do overtime. With that trip off due to the train strike it was all about earning money rather than spending it.
It was pissing down as the clock struck 1, so a colleague (who quit suddenly in the time it has taken me to write this) offered me a lift to by The Saddlers Centre car park. Not a long walk but like the bloke in the Heart “All I Wanna Do Is Make Love To You” song, I had no umbrella, no coat so I was happy with the lift. He’d bought everyone breakfast earlier too so he was in my good books that day..
Anyway I went into the Saddlers Centre and grabbed a cheap pair of jeans for work from a charity shop. Size 30. I don’t think I’ve worn size 30 since I was about 7. I left the centre via the other exit into glorious sunshine. It hadn’t taken that long to get the jeans on honest.
I saw an ice cream van and I wanted in. I was drawn to the Raspberry Brain Rotter Sundae. Purely because I’ve decided that if I ever have to change my name or do a witness protection thing I would go for the name Sebastian Rotter (inspired by Faris Rotter lead singer of The Horrors). I might have to rethink this now I’ve revealed it in a blog that is read around the world. Vince Rotter it is then.
On the evening my mate Gareth was up from Newport in Wales. I warned him not to head to close to the football ground as he might get a 2 year contract as our manager Mickey Flynn hails from there and likes a signing from his home town.Gareth had bought his friend Dai along and we met up in The Lyndon. Upon leaving, I turned to inform Gareth that I was nipping for a quick piss. Only it wasn’t him. I don’t know who the bloke was but he didn’t seem too interested in my bladder emptying movements.
I had guided the lads to The Wheatsheaf as I was peckish and wanted to try the new BBQ. I was craving a burger but upon reaching the food area the chef said it was jerk chicken and goat curry and that the food was all cooked and inside. So I went to the window at the kitchen. They had no idea what I was on about so I went back to the bar. The barmaid directed me to go outside, which was what I was told first time around. She marched off outside and came backing saying she thought I had to order at the bar but wasn’t sure. Losing the will to live I ordered a ham salad cob and took great pleasure in extracting the non bread/ham content.
Gareth and Dai were getting stuck into the rum. Last time I tried this it was a spicy cherry version in Katz. I was showing off and drinking it neat. Next thing I knew I was being put into a taxi so I played it safe this time and had an ale. A bloke latched into Dai and eventually asked our names. “Mikee” I said. “Martin?” “No, Mikee”. “Nice to meet you Martin” he concluded. Oh well. I get called Steve and Andy so it’s nice to have another name to go by.
We went to Walsall Arms and met our mate Dan and from there we hit Katz and sat outside in the pleasant surroundings until the un June like temperatures put paid to that.
Dai wanted to go where the women were so it was time for The Registry. There were ladies about so that was good. I was flagging soon afterwards due to the busy long working week. Something need to liven me up. A final drink was doing the trick until this was usurped by the DJ playing “Set You Free” by N-Trance. This is just one of the best songs ever and always brings back memories of my 40th birthday bash when it was played late on and the whole room went up.
I finished my drink, thanked the lads for a cracking evening and headed home.
Kent? Soon. Maybe.