I got up late last Saturday. Standard. The plan was to go on a mission to Bloxwich then for breakfast at the Walsall Arms. It was 10am when I rose, very lazy yeah so brekkie was pushed up the batting order.

When the Walsall Arms started doing Saturday breakfast last year, I was there for the first 9 weeks – missing out on the perfect 10 because of a wedding in Kent. Over the last few months though it has become a rare treat and boy did I need one of those on this day. I strolled in and instructed Jodi to “inject the fried bread into me.”

Breakfast was good. I stayed for an extra cuppa and used this bit of down time to finish reading “Everybody died, so I got a dog” by Emily Dean. It is heartwarming, has some brilliant lines in it but also a tragic side which really resonated with me. Emily used to co host the Frank Skinner Show on Absolute Radio so she was the voice of my Saturday mornings for 15 years, so it felt right to finish her book at that time. A great line that stays with me was from her father “be wary of people who make more noise than impact.” Nobody noticed my makeshift bookmark, fashioned from a spent work post it note. Even when looking cultured by reading a book, I still manage to make it uncouth.

Anyway it was a pleasant time. I’ve really cut down on the Walsall pub visits these past few months so it was nice. I’ve been trying to save money so I can travel more. Collated a bit but the plan is generally being scuppered be me keep going away for weekends. Oh well, the water bill free months are coming. I’ll save then. As I was about to leave, “Undressed” by Sombr came on which is my favourite song of the moment so I delayed the departure a little. I nearly ordered another cuppa.

I was soon on the way to Bloxwich. It was the opening day of a pork scratching shop, the kind of retail outlet that I can really get on board with. Cool Hog is based on Park Road by Windsor Fish Bar and they have a palindromic post code WS3 3SW, which I approve of. Love a palindrome – “step on no pets” is one of my faves. I used to serve the Cool Hog owner Luke in the trade counter at Cardboard Boxes 2 Go so it was good to go and reverse the roles.

Kid in a sweet shop is a bit of a cliche but grown man in a scratchings shop is the future. There are different flavours – I opted for the biggest jar of maple plus some other bits and bobs including a cookie. Hot scratchings are available which I discovered for the first time on the legendary Erdington day. I resisted the urge this time though as everyone on the 32 bus would have wanted one. It was all very exciting.

Because I’d spent above a certain amount (I forget what) I got to spin the wheel to see if I won a prize. I didn’t. Great shop though with friendly staff. I wish them well. They are open Tuesday to Saturday 9am until 6pm (5pm on a Saturday. Check out http://www.coolhog.co.uk or find them on Facebook. (As I type this 3 days on I’ve now tried the maple flavour and they are amazing. I’d be having to go to Scratchings Anonymous if I lived close by.)

I was meeting friends on the afternoon, arriving last to the Black Country Arms. I’d been editing last Sundays blog – not gorging on scratchings and I loitered at the bar to check the Walsall score and was pleasantly surprised to see us 1-0 up at MK. I grabbed a Diet Coke and headed upstairs. Mark, Swill and Morti were already there along with Gareth and Tina who were up from Wales. Gareth and I go back to the 90’s but this was only my second time of meeting Tina. At home I’d grabbed a shirt out the wardrobe and then because I’m a bit weird I checked what I was wearing the last time I met Tina. It was the same shirt. I swapped it for my Brasseye “Drugs” episode t-shirt.

Swill had got an umbrella. I asked if there was a sweepstake for when he’d lose it. Walsall held on for the win which was a cracking result. How did Swill and I celebrate this stunning win? Well we had a chat about death. We certainly know how to party. By 17.39 Swill was starting on the poo anecdotes. This should have been another sweepstake.

Mark disappeared and shortly afterwards we hit The Tap & Tanner. En route we passed the new barbers on the market. It was pointed out that they had an available chair for me. Quickest response I could muster on the spot was “I’ve got to have a back, sack and crack. Catch you up.” I had been looking for a reason to start reviewing all these new barbers in town, don’t worry. I won’t include photos.

In The Tap, Swill was talking of his exploits on AI. He said that he could take a picture of me, make me naked and put in any woman that has a picture on the internet. I was torn between being bemused by this or giving him my bank details and telling him to make me an album. I opted for the former. Talking of AI. I was asked recently if I use it to write my blogs. I honestly don’t. For 2 reasons. I wouldn’t know how to and no computer would be able to replicate the thought processes that go through my head.

The music started at 7.30 and it was really loud, conversation stifling (although I didn’t mind this when Rick Astley was played. Opps, there goes my street cred running out the door again.) When UB40 came on we scarped across the road to The Registry.

We found a decent booth in The Reg and really put the world to right. Music was at a decent level and it was a pleasant visit. Morti departed and the remainder of the group headed up to Katz.

There was a live band on in Katz and it was busy but we dropped lucky with seats as a group was leaving. I didn’t know any of the songs but the band were good. Swill was impressed with them and he knows his way around a guitar. He delighted us with a bit of air guitar on his umbrella, getting the handle fully erect for added effect.

We finished up in The Walsall Arms. Jodi was back on duty although no longer behind the bar taking breakfast orders, she was now on the dj decks taking requests. At the end of the Erdington day it was also her request night. I didn’t ask for anything that time and one of the first we heard in here on this occasion was “I Kissed A Girl” by Katy Perry and to be honest, nothing I could choose was topping that. Also I’d got “Light The Night” by Andy Burrows – theme tune to The Snowman & The Snowdog in my head. As great a song as it is, not really suitable for the last Saturday in August.

Swill still had his umbrella. Unprecedented. To celebrate this he fully opened it and had a dance around with it. Don’t ask what song, no idea. I don’t minute everything. He said his goodbyes shortly afterwards. He’d left over half a pint. I pulled it alongside mine. It’s what he would have wanted.

It was a top end to an amazing day. Nice to catch up with great mates. Jodi finished with a bit of Backstreet Boys “I Want It That Way” and we called it a night after giving that a sing song. I had a reduced price Tesco Finest “luxury” prawn cocktail waiting for me in the fridge.

I took a slow amble home, checking if Danny’s Chicken was open, which it wasn’t. I mnade it home and crasjed out. I had the prawn cocktail for breakfast,.