Evo Boozy Scribbler

I woke up on Saturday to sunlight illuminating my house. What a delight. I don’t see the Sun very often but now it was certainly a case of “the Sun has got his hat on, hip hip hip hoo-bloody-ray”. Typically though by the time I had got ready (today’s song of choice whilst ironing was Take Me To Church by Hozier) and fannied about a bit he had disappeared. It was like he hadn’t just removed his hat but also encased it in concrete and chucked it in the North Sea never to be seen again.

Saturday was the first pre season friendly for Walsall FC. I’d never been to Alvechurch. I was aware of it though as we have signed players from them like David Kelly, Richard O’Kelly and Harry Williams. It is also where road rage killer Tracie Andrews lived with Lee Harvey.

Breakfast was first so it was off to The Walsall Arms. I’d mentioned to Jaz in the week that I’d be there early and explained that I had a train to catch. She promised to have breakfast ready for me. I walked in bang on 10am and true to her word breakfast was in front of me straight away. It was epic and I so needed that mug of tea having not got up in time to make one before I left the house.

I was able to take a leisurely stroll to the railway station, almost getting taken out by a Just Eat delivery man cycling on the pavement. This happens most days and I now class it as part of my routine. There will be a collision one day and I will sue for millions and also have his bag of food and bike off him.

There was confusion at the ticket office. I asked for a return to Alvechurch. He replied “no problem, return to Old Hill.”no, return to Alvechurch, Worcestershire” I replied not at all confidently. “Oh Alvechurch” he said pronouncing it with an r after the e. “Yes please.” I though “we’re getting there” was the slogan for travelling by train. Not for just trying to buy the ticket for it. I must point out at this juncture that I have no idea where Old Hill is (and at the time of writing this, hangover Monday following the Euro final I haven’t researched it) but I now want to go. I’ll probably rock up and there will be no pubs.

Anyway I got the train I was aiming for, changed at Aston and 4 minutes later I was on the chuff chuff to Alvechurch. I can do good planning occasionally. I’d done my research. I knew there was a great looking pub by the railway sation, and how to walk to the other pubs and the ground. I got to The Weighbridge to find Colin Plant, Wurzel and Snudge sat outside. Colin recommended the Bridge 60 beer which I’d never heard off so I headed in with him close behind.

“Oh they’ve got the cobs out now Evo, cause you’re here” commented Colin. I wasn’t hungry but pondered getting one to walk into town with. I ordered my beer and asked “what cobs have you got?” “These are cheese” the nice barmaid replied “but we could do you a ham one.” “Could you do me a ham and cheese one?” I asked. “Ham and cheese?” she queried looking genuinely baffled. “Er yes, please.” “Ham and cheese together?” she clarified. “Erm yes.” The barmaid called the cob lady over. “Can you do this man ham and cheese on a cob?” “Ham AND cheese?” the lady queried sounding really confused. I was causing a right kerfuffle. Colin was like “fuckin hell Evo, you’ve been in the pub 3 minutes and you’re causing trouble. Cobgate was now spreading. One of the locals waded in with “why don’t you just have a ham cob and a cheese one and combine them.” “I couldn’t possibly eat two” I replied. Yeah, hold that thought. I grabbed my pint and ran.

The Weighbridge is next to Alvechurch Marina and it was very pleasant sitting there looking out over the boats. It was very warm but not sunny. He was popping out sporadically but he certainly no longer had his hat on. More like an ill fitting baseball cap.

A young lad brought two cobs out. Both with thick cheese and gammon style ham on. I really don’t know why I got two. The lad must have been thinking ‘you greedy sod George.’ That is of course if he calls people he doesn’t know the names of George like I do. Anyway the cobs were amazing. I ate both just to prove a point. I don’t know what point but I enjoyed proving it. I’d paid £7.50 but didn’t know if I’d paid for pint and one cob or pint and two cobs. Presumably there was no button on the till for ham and cheese cob so perhaps I just sent the whole system haywire.

I power walked into town (I had carbs to burn off) and ticked off the Red Lion first. Busy with a few fellow Saddlers in and a very foodies type place. A few tables had reserved on, but I eventually found one for 2. I’d been sat there for all of three minutes when a man came up and asked if the other chair was free. I pondered claiming I was waiting for Patsy Kensit but he may have smelt bullshit so I let him have it. He picked it up and marched away.

The Alvechurch Inn was next. I was exchanging pleasantries with the barmaid (she had no idea The Mighty Walsall FC were in town). Colin walked in and it took all of 2 minutes for him to point out the cobs on the bar. I was all cobbed out for the day. And possibly the next couple.

The Swan was next. I’d seen a few Facebook check ins here so I knew this was were most people were gathering. I got a warm welcome from a busy room. Off the top of my head there was Kimbo, “Marvellous” Matt Stacky with his kids, Tomo, Tim, Ryan and Jase from Katz (I’d already seen his wife Mel on the train so it was good to complete the set). Apologies to those that I’ve missed.

It was good in The Swan with great people. I’d budgeted for a taxi to the ground but was offered a lift in Tomo’s minibus which was decent. We got to the ground at 2.59. Bit early for my liking but it was the first game of pre season so it’s all about preparing for the months ahead. The later arrivals will come as the season gets underway.

Me and Jase headed for the bar but then I decided I didn’t want a beer and went to watch the game. Most unlike me. I went in the clubhouse before half time to beat the rush and again decided against a pint, instead I just sat and watched some tennis. I hadn’t seen a second of this years Wimbledon so it was nice to finally see a bit and I missed our first goal.

It’s not immediately clear which toilets are which and I nearly walked into the ladies. Safely in the gents a lad struck up conversation and said that he actually did walk in the ladies and a woman was in there but she was fine with it. Had that been me, I’d have soon had a very damp Andrex roll bounce off my head.

Dave O’Shea joined me for the second half, I saw our 3rd goal (we won 3-0) and had a good chat with Dave. I saw lots of fellow Saddlers Dean, Kerry and Oli to name a few and it was a really good day. It’s what’s good about pre season, seeing people you haven’t seen for a couple of months.

I turned down a lift back to Walsall on Tomo’s minibus as I wanted to go back to The Weighbridge and also because I’m a kind of “I’ve paid for my train ticket, I’m going to bloody use it” kind of guy.

Back in the pub, via a nice short cut which took out the town centre I asked for the same beer that I’d had earlier but was given Goats Milk instead. This must have been payback for cobgate. I didn’t ask for one this time. The Goats Milk was excellent though so no harm done. Colin asked if I’d eaten in the ground and I fessed up to a small tin of Pringles at half time but it was strange for me to go to a game and not use the bar or catering facilities. I shall not be making a habit of that.

I made the train back ok this time changing at Duddeston as I’ve been fascinated by the derelict state of that station since I was a kid.

Back in Walsall I had time to kill. I was due at The Watering Trough at 9 but it was half 7. I went to St Matts Hall, had latte and ravaged the free refill’s. I also had the 10 chicken wings started just to keep my metabolism ticking over. I made a toilet visit before departure. There was a man at urinal no 5 so I could use no 2. If you’re new to this blog I have a thing about toilets in pubs, I always like to use urinal number 2, or if it’s a trough I stand roughly where no 2 would be. Obviously if nobody is using 1 or 3. Toilets had social distancing rules long before Covid.

Amyway the other guy gets to the sinks before me, I rocked up and out the corner of my eye I see him take a step back before loudly exclaiming “fucking hell”. He then walked nonchalantly to the hand drier. I wanted more info. I glanced at the sink to see if anything untoward was occurring like a snake emerging out of the plug hole but nothing. Context please folks.

I got to The Trough on time. Angie the landlady was on and it’s always good to see her. We were there for Becki’s birthday. She explained that her fiancee Jon wasn’t there as he was clay pigeon shooting and more drunk than she was. Drunk clay pigeon shooting? This sounds ace. I know the chances of me ever having a stag do are minimal but if I do then drunk clay pigeon shooting is on the agenda. It would be carnage and we could probably get away with a smaller minibus for the return journey.

I had a couple of beers then departed. Becki says it went mental after I left so I hope she had a great birthday bash. I usually walk home over Church Hill but as The Trough is halfway up Ablewell Street I just carried on up there. I somehow took a wrong turn though (maybe 2 wrong turns) and ended up outside The Walsall Arms. Oh well, while I’m here I might as well pop in.

I’m glad I did as Woza was in with Becky. I’ve not seen him since my birthday so that was good. He had supposed to be on a tour of town but had come here first and because the HPA was so good they had stayed.

The singer was decent, and it’s always good to exchange pleasantries with Jaz too and have a catch up with Woza. Successful visit. He did confirm that Alvechurch is pronounced with an r after the e.

Class day. Alvechurch (a) in the F A Cup First Round please. It might just be ready for a cob again by November.

I had a basic plan for last Saturday. Get up early and finish work on last weeks blog about Bloxwich. Go to Walsall Arms for a breakfast sandwich. Go to Digbeth Dining Club at Walsall Arboretum then The Met Bar (Wharf/Bar 10) for England v Switzerland. Easy yeah? No. This is me we are on about.

It took much longer to work on the blog than I thought and so I was an hour later leaving the house than planned and I was now ravenous. The breakfast sandwich was now going out of the window and it was the works instead.

Although it was only the second Saturday of Walsall Arms breakfasts, Jodi who was serving knew the drill. Mug of tea and no tomato or mushrooms. It was another successful breakfast mission but it was time to head to the dining event at the Arboretum although actually eating there was now being pushed further back into the afternoon.

I stepped outside. It was drizzling. I hadn’t brought a coat. It’s July plus it was dry when I left the house. I’d checked the BBC weather app and it had said 80% chance of rain all day until 7 pm when it dropped to zero percent. So it would be dry just as the England match would be finishing and we might be launching ourselves into the canal in despair.

I thought about pressing on as I’m only out for a few hours but then common sense kicked in. This doesn’t happen to me often. I’m going to be out in the open for several hours. It’s a 10 minute walk back to the house. Go and grab a raincoat. I knew people that were going to The Arboretum but we hadn’t arranged a meet up as such so I wasn’t letting anybody down with how late I would be rocking up.

It didn’t help that I saw a cat on my road. They normally run off from me but this one was relaxing, looked up and gave me a big meow which I always like and he accepted fuss.

I grabbed a raincoat and set off. Down Church Hill, past Katz and to the front entrance of the Arboretum. I knew from Facebook that the event was near the Wildlife Centre. I knew not where that was but assumed it was by the Visitor Centre. Yes yes yes, I know you should never assume. You make an ass out of u and me etc etc but I didn’t know how big this event was. It wasn’t by the Visitor Centre.

Jayne had checked into the event on Facebook neary an hour earlier so I rang her. The line was crap and she couldn’t understand me so put Sean on. He said they’d come away and were heading to the Toby. I liked the thought of them going to a dining club then heading for a mossiv carvery. He later confirmed that they had decided it was beer time and gone to the Toby for a pint and taxi to The Met. It’s times like this we really miss The Park Tavern.

I digress. Sean said that the event was down the other end. So I walked and soon found it but it was up an embankment which was very overgrown. So I walked and walked and eventually found a gap for me to nip up. I had clearly taken the wrong path. Not for the first time in my life. So basically I should have used the entrance by The Grange Playhouse. The one that is 15 minutes from my house. Organised Evans strikes again. I had to walk around the temporary fence to get to the entrance but at long last I was in.

There were lots of food stalls, one coffee stand and 3 or 4 bars along with a DJ to get some tunes blasting. And loads of people. I thought the rubbish weather and the 5 pm England match might have put people off but this wasn’t the case. There were quite a few people in Birmingham City shirts which surprised me. Well it’s been a few years since we’ve played them so I took it they were here for this event and then popping to some pubs to practise ahead of our pre season friendly with them on the 27th.

I bumped into Mark and Sarah. The former I see regularly but the latter I’ve not seen since a random meet in Cannock Wethersppons a few years ago. Things escalated quickly and within minutes I was serenading Sarah with the chorus to my favourite Shania Twain song “You’re Still The One”. There is context to this. I told her where I was watching the game and we talked of The Wharf of old and I mentioned the time we had a dismal defeat at Scunthorpe and afterwards we went to a Shania tribute night at said bar and she didn’t do that song. Sarah said she didn’t know it but recognised it from my rendition. I think she just wanted ,me to sing it to her. I didn’t mind. It’s not often I get to sing to lovely ladies.

I didn’t stay long. It was soon 3pm and I knew that Swill was getting to The Met at that time. I grabbed a double headed ice cream from a van outside the perimeter fence (which people without tickets could go to) then I set off. There was a performance going on in the bandstand so I watched that for a couple of minutes then proceeded.

I got to by what was Chicago’s and received a message from Josh. He was in McDonalds. I’d not seen him since Thursday (quite long by our standards) so I popped in. He asked about my day. He then summed it up. “So you paid £4 to go to a dining club, didn’t eat there and now you’re having a McDonalds?” Yeah. Me in a nutshell. Those divine limited edition Mozzarella Bites aren’t going to eat themselves are they? They are in danger of pushing Nigella Bites down to number 2 on my bites leader board.

Josh had got his wife Lyndsey and their 3 kids with him but not Mad Max the dog. As I’m round Josh’s all the time me and Max have properly bonded and Lyndsey even says I’m his favourite person. I’d have given him a Mozzarella Bite but he wasn’t under the table. I did check.

Josh and his entourage were off to The Locker (Saddlers Club) so I bade them all farewell and headed to The Met. It was rammed which was good to see and the atmosphere was lively. There was a good group out. Swill Mase Beth Sean Lauren Ian Jayne Chris Hannah Panda Dan and Martin were all out on international duty so I joined them. Swill’s brother Ant, who I haven’t seen in decades was also out so it was good to see him.

At half time the usual England anthems started to play and I headed to the bar. Swill mentioned that he’d just waited half an hour to be served. This would not be likely to change with the half time rush so I strolled to the Brewers Fayre next door and got served straight away.

I rued missing out on World In Motion, Three Lions and Vindaloo but as I supped my Madri here I was treated to Waiting For A Star To Fall by Boy Meets Girl. I was 14 when this came out and I really fancied the woman in the video.

The penalty shoot out win sparked joyous scenes and there were no despairing dives into the canal after all. Panda bought a tray of Baby Guinness shots which rounded off the proceedings nicely.

The group started to dwindle. I asked Swill what the plan was but he must have thought he was on 1 Versus 100 as he dodged the question. I asked another 3 times and he avoided answering. I felt like Jeremy Paxman interviewing Michael Howard.

Mase announced that he and Beth (Mrs Mase) were going to The Registry. I was on board with this so made a final toilet visit. I was mid flow when I realised I had company at the urinal. Coxy, who I didn’t know was even in the building had joined me for a natter. He’d already had his piss so there was no danger of us crossing the streams. I hadn’t seen him for ages so it was good to chat. Next time though Coxy let’s do it in the bar, or at Bescot Stadium. Best of both worlds maybe? Bar at Bescot Stadium.

I think we only had one pint in The Reg, Panda offered me a lift home in his taxi which was very decent of him as he lives at the opposite end of the Walsall borough but I couldn’t let him go out of his way so I declined and took a very pleasant stroll. Fantastic day with lots of good people. There is nothing like football for bringing people together. Now come on England in the final tonight.

Last Saturday was ace. It started well. Jaz at The Walsall Arms had announced that she was going to trial doing Saturday breakfasts for a few weeks. Well this needed looking into. This is the kind of investigative journalism that I got into this game for. Breakfasts are served between 10 am and midday which suited me perfectly as I had to be in Leamore for 12.

The deal is a full English and a pint for £10. Cracking value but I’ve got to be honest, and please don’t think less of me but I wasn’t feeling booze that early. I asked if I could have a mug of tea instead, and they dropped the price to £7. Everyone’s happy. Breakfast was ace. I’d requested no tomatoes or mushrooms as usual. The bacon was cooked exactly as I like it, which I can’t even manage to do myself.

It was time to meet Chris as we were starting at the North Walsall Athenaeum Club, one of the very few licensed premises in the Walsall borough that I have never been in. I wasn’t totally sure where it was but Chris had given instructions and to both of our surprise I got off the bus at the right stop.

Chris was waiting for me and was armed with bad mews. The club had put its opening back by half an hour. He suggested going to the Dog House (ace antique centre) to kill time as he knows I’d like to go. I turned this down as when I make my maiden visit I want time to have a proper mooch around, plus knowing me I’d have purchased one of the old telephone boxes outside. We’d have had to cart it round all day in a “to me, to you” style and this would have got tiresome by pub no 8. So we went for a stroll to the local shop.

We passed a skip and I always have to have a glance in. I stopped to admire a lovely looking white door which killed 30 seconds then we pressed on. I only play the National Lottery when it’s a must be won draw and as this was the case that night I had a go. I invited Chris to pick a number and he went for 8. This worked for me as it’s an even number plus also the luckiest number to the Chinese and they invented sweet and sour king prawn balls so they know their stuff.

Did Chris’s number help me win win millions? I’d love to say yes and I’m currently taking over Walsall FC and looking at houses in Saint Lucia but in truth I don’t know. I haven’t checked the ticket. I still have two tickets from May to check as well. Things don’t happen quickly in my house.

Chris bought us both a Fry’s Turkish Delight which was as random as it was delightful and we headed to the club. James joined us and after a pleasant pint we moved on to The Railway where Chris got excited by a horse called Popmaster on he tv. It led for a while before coming nowhere. Ken Bruce should have played his 5-4-3-2-1 countdown over the public address system to try and make it run faster.

The Lamp Tavern was next. Kingston Town was playing as we walked in earning the place an immediate point deduction. Things improved with Sophie Ellis-Bextor’s Murder On The Dance-floor and I was chuffed that someone else joined in with singing “the all together” like in the video. It”s usually just me.

The Beacon Way on the other side of Bloxwich was the next target. Annette the landlady was her usual friendly welcoming self. The crusty cobs with burnt tops looked amazing. I’ve never understood the burnt tops thing but it works. I grabbed a ham and cheese one to eat later. Chris commented that he couldn’t eat it as he doesn’t like butter or cheese. I couldn’t cope with this. How dare he. The music was absolute classics like Working My Way Back To You, Beggin’ and an ELO one the name of which escapes me. I’d struggled with the beer in the first pubs but in here I finally started to wake up, tucking into the pint and singing along gleefully.

I decided I couldn’t be arsed to carry the cob around so I demolished it. Chris said it was the best looking cob he’d seen in Walsall and actually could have eaten it. I’d offered him one at the bar and he’d turned it down and as a fellow quizzer he knows you can only accept the first answer.

On the way to The Robert Peel I stopped to marvel at the Princess Diana statue that was commisioned by the local stonemason with the intention of donating it to Walsall town centre but after negative reviews on it’s unveiling it now resides outside the company premises.

Chris announced a change of plan at this juncture. This worried me. In the week he’d announced us walking to Newtown which I’d flatly refused and we were now close to the road there, but no. We were off to a club I wasn’t aware of. Bloxwich Stafford Road Sports Club. My claim to have been to virtually every pub and club in Walsall was starting to look like it had huge holes in it. Chris crashed the Spicy Tomato Snaps, a favourite crisp of my childhood. It was in here that it was revealed that it was James’s birthday. Chris was going to wait until 7pm to wish him happy birthday. I asked James if he was born at 7pm but he wasn’t Chris just wanted a build up. If you;re interested I was born at 21.36 which I reckon my mom would have been chuffed with as she’d have been able to watch the soaps beforehand.

Sir Robert Peel was next. Beautifully decked out in England flags but we suspected that the multi country bunting may have been in storage since the 2022 World Cup, unless Wales Qatar Morocco Saudi Arabia Canada Argentina and Brazil had all qualified for the Euro’s while nobody was looking. Although saying that I had no idea that Austria had qualified until I got them in the work sweepstake then they topped their group ahead of France and Italy.

The Romping Cat was next. The barmaid was great although she proper had to climb up to grab crisps and then blamed Chris for saying he asked for the wrong ones. We settled down to watch the dying embers of Italy v Switzerland. I checked with a local if I would block his view and he was fine but also really happy that I’d asked. He thanked me and shook my hand which I liked. I always try to be courteous to people but it’s not often thanked for. The people in this pub are usual sound and this visit was no exception.

The Spring Cottage was busy with a disco in full flow and then it was the last pub The Hatherton Arms. I love this place. The karaoke is as close as I’ll get to how it was in The Fitters and the host Gaz is superb. An in pub running joke is whenever he says “any requests” everyone shouts “fuck off”. He was on his usual top form with a comment after one performance being “we’ve got some great singers here in Bloxwich. They’ll be here shortly.”

There was a group of nice ladies clearly in a party mood which added to the occasion and one of them kissed me on the back of my head then went back to the bar. I should maybe have chatted her up but after all the booze I probably wouldn”t have made much sense. But then again with my general conversation approach I probably wouldn’t have made much sense in pub 1. Another superb visit to this place.

We walked back to Leamore and went in Abdul’s, which I’ve never been in before. It’s unlicensed, which I didn’t know prior to entering but for once I didn’t mind. I’d had a bit to drink. I went for a chicken balti with cheese naan and it was nice but a bit more sauce to mop up would have been good. Chris paid for mine and James’s food which was thoroughly decent. Chris announced that an X51 was due so I bade them both farewell and ran for it. Unfortunately the bus wan’t going up near my house, terminating instead at Walsall bus station but I still felt right as rain so took a very pleasant walk home over Church Hill (sorry Carole).

Magnificent day from start to finish. Thanks to all involved.

It was the last Friday of June. Where is this year going? It seems like only five minutes since we were all singing Auld Lang Syne and then forgetting our Dry January “promises” within seconds of it starting.

It was a decent day at work and afterwards I was heading to Cannock for alcohol and curry. Two of my favourite things. My wonderful colleague Carole offered me a lift as she lives over that way. Turned out in the end to be just a lift from the back of the Manor Hospital to the front as the traffic was looking a bit poo and we deduced I’d probably have more chance of getting there on time on the train. So I jumped out and took a gentle stroll. Thanks though Carole.

The train was on time and I was soon in Cannock. As I left the station I heard sirens, looked up and saw a fire engine bombing down the road. Someone in a control room somewhere must have instructed “oh, there’s a Walsall lad at the railway station, better try and make him feel at home.”

It didn’t take long to reach The Merchant. Foo Fighters were playing as I walked in which was a good start. During international football tournaments they way I decide if I like a pub changes, and the main criteria becomes about how many England flags are on show and they had certainly gone to town here, even including them on top of the lager displays. I was served straight away and found a (wonky) table. I had put my glass on it for about a second and “Comedy” Dave walked in. Perfect timing. Almost like we had planned it.

He went to the bar and I moved to the next table which was also wonky. He returned and we moved along and got a happy table. We had much to catch up on but the first conversation was about how it’s only 16 months until we have known each other for 20 years. It’s been an absolute blast though. This guy literally saved my existence when he moved in with me in 2013 following a previous house sharing arrangement going very wrong. When he moved in I was on the verge of giving up the house I was renting at the time and going to live in a tent in the Arboretum so cheers for that Dave. First workmates, then housemates but always great mates.

The music was really good in here and we didn’t want to move on but I had more pubs to visit. As we walked up the main street Dave noticed a renamed pub now called The Jam Inn. I like this place and have ticked it off in it’s previous names of Bar 77 and JK’s but hadn’t planned on visiting it this time. However a renamed pub has to be re-ticked according to English laws that date back to medieval times so in we went.

A laid back version of Always On My Mind was playing, we got served straight away and settled in a quiet part of the place. During our drink a fire alarm went off. No idea who it was aimed at but from behind us came a shout of “put your knickers back on, too much heat is coming out.” Comment of the night. The alarm quickly went silent and we didn’t have to assemble outside, though nobody was showing much interest in doing this anyway.

Next up was New Hall Arms, the must visit pub of Cannock. Tony the landlord was in and he welcomed me by announcing to the room that the Lord Mayor Of Walsall is in. I like it when someone else steps up and makes a place all about me and saving me a job.

We were slightly behind schedule so rather than peruse the board I just asked tony and he recommended two so I opted for a Rocky from Shiny Brewery and it was good.

The Royal Oak was next. First song that came on was She Moves In Her Own Way by The Kooks. Class song and tune of the night I reckon. We got served and went uo the back and sat in an elevated section. I’ve been in this pub many times and didn’t know an upper tier is available. The music was class and we continued chatting. I don’t know how she came into the conversation but Dave mention Dua Lipa who I had to fess up as having heard of but didn’t know anything about her.

“You’ve never seen Dua Lipa?” clarified Dave. “No.” “Mate, she’s a solid 10.” I asked if I could quote him on that and he was fine. He called up pictures and yes he has a point. After a few seconds of scrolling down he deduced “oh, you won’t like her. She doesn’t wear a bra.” So Dua, here’s the deal. Appreciate that it’s unlikely that we will ever go on a date but if we do, can you wear a white bra please? Thanks. I’ll buy the Nargis Kebabs.

The Linford Arms is Cannock’s Wetherspoons and that was next. I asked Dave what he wanted. He replied “Corona.” I misheard and asked for 2 Peroni. I turned to Dave. “I’ve joined you. I’ve never had this, I’m excited.” “You’ve never had this?” Dave queried. thinking I,d ordered 2 Corona. The barman must have heard our conversation though and decided Dave was in charge as we did indeed get two Corona. Pints of it which I didn’t even know was a thing.

It was curry time before we knew it. The main reason for heading to Cannock other than the catch up with Dave was to go to Shabab. I do the Cannock pubs quite often but never get to go for curry. Shabab is the home of the post Friday night performance AMCS cast curry. I’ve not done this curry for a while having only done 1 of the last 5 shows and I couldn’t partake that night due to getting home issues. So it needed a revisit.

It was busy as we walked in but we got a table, seated near a group discussing the new Walsall FC tops. I went for a chicken curry with a cheese naan and it was ace. We got chocolate and a very yummy shot at the end too. The shot was like an orange flavoured Bailey’s but I’m not sure what it actually was. Dave can we go back to research please?

Dave paid for the food which was very decent of him. We went our separate ways. Next door to Shabab is a crackling pub called The Arcade and even though I’d just missed my target train (22.03) with the next one not due for 40 minutes I opted instead to just take a nice peaceful amble to the station.

Upon arriving back in Walsall a bus to near my house wasn’t due for 20 minutes so I walked home. Sorry Carole (she tells me off for walking over Church Hill at night.)

Cheers for a good night Comedy. Cannock I shall no doubt be back soon. Save me a Peroni in Wetherspoons.

UK Golden Fried Chicken & Pizza, 24 Bradford Street, Walsall.

This was the Kebab Ranch for years, then Zi’s Kebab for a little while and now in another guise. It reopened with this name the week before Easter. I originally reviewed jt on Maundy Thursday but I failed to make any notes that time. “Why?” I hear you ask. Was I too excited about the 4 day weekend? Feasible. Was I looking forward to Lent being over so I could start eating Avocado again? No. In truth I was too busy admiring a fellow customer’s spotless and glistening white trainers.

This review came after work in early June. I wanted something light as I was going to the gym afterwards so had the 3 piece chicken meal but I didn’t want the drink so he knocked 80p off bringing the total down to £5.

There was no music which suited me. The food came quickly and I sat at a table looking out onto what was Harley’s nightclub and went through numerous good memories of the place.

Food was good and as it’s on the way home from work I may pop in again. Especially as KFC in ASDA has apparently now closed. Jesus, I only stopped going in for a few months. I must stop boycotting places. It never ends well.

Chicken Palace Royale, 83 Stafford Street, Walsall.

Former chip shop opposite Rock Steady Eddie’s. It closed for a while but now reopened with a new name and lay out. The counter has moved from the back to the right and seating is now available. I know this doesn’t sound like me but I wasn’t that hungry and I wasn’t drinking much on the evening so didn’t need to line the stomach.

There is offers on the window and the £1.99 chicken burger and fries leapt out. That’ll do. I like it when I know what I’m ordering as I walk in. I was served straight away and handed over a £2 coin and stood there waiting for my penny change. Which turned out to not be coming. Ok it’s only a penny but I collected my small change in a big tub and then take it to Santander in Birmingham where a machine counts it for free instead of charging 10p in the pound like ones in supermarkets do. Anyway I digress if you are charging £2 just bloody put £2. I honestly don’t think you’ll lose any custom.

There was no music again which suited me. The food came quickly and it was really good. I wasn’t expecting gourmet for £1.99 (sorry £2) but this did the job. As it’s local to several good drinking holes, I shall no doubt be back but I’ll be taking £1.99 in exact change.

Papa John’s, 138 Lichfield Street, Walsall.

I’m usually busy on Monday evenings, so things have to make way. Like cooking. On this pleasant Monday in June I was needed at Katz so there was no point going home so I decided pizza was in order.

I’ve never been in Papa John’s despite it being here for years (many more than I thought, it was there in 2011 according to Google Streetview). I’d never even set foot in the building before, it was some kind of financial institute previously (cheers Chris for the help with this research). I actually thought it was a public bank before. Needless to say I was now ready to make a withdrawal.

I strolled in and perused the menu and then the nice lady said the magic words “special offers” so I went over but they were the same that I’d seen in the window.

Now this is where you all tut and shake your heads. I’m sorry to announce but I think my days of eating medium size pizzas are over I really don’t eat like I used to. I went for the small sausage and pepperoni pizza. On the menu it also listed tandoori chicken wings as “new”. It’s not often I’m on board with new stuff so I dived on them.

I grabbed a seat by the window and looked out at the Town Hall and started pondering how I will decorate it when I become Mayor. No doubt lots pf white paint and pictures of me. Like my house.

The food came quickly and as I walked back to my stool the sun came out from behind the Town Hall tower, illuminating me and making me feel like I was back on stage. I should have started singing “There Is Nothing Like A Dame” to really embrace the moment.

There was no music playing but as I sat down they started furiously scrubbing the Kitchen floor, the sound of which was actually quite relaxing. Food was good, maybe one more chicken wing wouldn’t have hurt for the £6.99 cost and the pizza could have had another sprinkle of toppings but I was getting it at the offer price so wasn’t expecting much. Good visit this.

Oodles, 44 High Street, Walsall.

It was Tuesday this week. Also payday which meant I was duty bound by law to go out and spend money. I had oodles of time on my hands before heading to Walsall Arms to watch England v Slovenia so I headed here.

This place opened last year in the new builds up the market. I remember opening day and they were giving 50% off so I’d gone along. Unfortunately word had got round and it’s fair to say that Walsall town centre hasn’t seen queues like on that day since Rocky IV opened at the ABC cinema. I went to the Black Country Arms, grabbed a pint and sat in a window where I could monitor the situation. I gave up 45 minutes before the offer closed as the queue was still massive. So I grabbed another pint along with a cheese, onion and black pudding cob.

So after not ticking it off on opening day, it was nice to finally pop in. You pick from 3 sizes of box (medium in this case) two bases and two toppings one dry and one sauce. My sauce was bbq chicken and dry was crispy prawns. The prawns incurred an addition cost of £1.95, which was advised on the menu. In the window I’d seen a poster for chlli cod (advertised as being so-fish-ticated) so asked if that was a starter only to find out that it was a topping so I swapped the bbq chicken for this. This also incurred an additional cost of £1.95 but this wasn’t pointed out although I quickly figured it out when she asked for the money.

Upon asking for the chilli cod the lady did point out “it will be spicy” which I confirmed I was fine with. She did seem surprised though when I turned down a drink. I reckoned that there would be plenty of time for liquid later.

The chairs are either black or white. You know my favourite colour so I’m not going to waste any of your Sunday by pointing out my choice in this respect. The food me quickly and it was good. Prawns were ace which is standard and the chilli cod was great. I would say I coped with the spice but my nose waved a white flag and began to run a little. Good visit this and that first pint of Thatcher’s Cloudy Lemon Cider went down a storm afterwards.

Mehman, 51 Mount Street, Walsall.

For decades this was a newsagents, it closed for a while then recently Josh was driving me from my house to his and we passed it and I noticed it was now a food place. It was probably my most dramatic bit of rubber necking as I tried to check it out. It needed further investigating.

Wednesday this week, it was far too hot to cook yeah? It seemed like the perfect day to visit. It also meant a nice leisurely post work stroll in the Sun. There was entertainment en route. As I got to the the Wednesbury Road zebra crossing a bus stopped to let me cross. The driver of the car behind was clearly nonplussed as he pulled up alongside the bus to offer the driver some good-natured abuse. “Fucking arsehole” was my favourite of the comments.

I got to the place and there are menus in the window which I perused before heading inside. It is billed as a Cafe & Biryani Take but I wasn’t feeling curry. They also do chicken and burgers but I hit the starter menu. I went for fish pakora (£1.99), chicken pakora (£1.99) and a chicken samosa (£1). I’m no Rachel Riley and useless at Maths but I quickly worked out the total at £4.98. I handed over a used fiver and yes, I got my 2p change.

The food took a little while to come out but at least I knew it was being cooked fresh. I studied the menu again. The slogan on the front says “Taste Like Home”. Unfortunately I’ve never made these at home so cannot make the comparison.

There was no music so I sang the Lene Marlin song “Where I’m Headed” to myself. This one has surged from absolutely nowhere to become my most played song of the week.

The food came and I got more than I thought I would for the price I’d paid. They even provided a plate of salad and sauce sachets. The food was good. I muttered “I enjoyed that” as I put my fork down. Verdict? Mehman certainly isn’t meh, man. I will be going back. It’s nice to think that Mount Street is now offering something else to get visitors flocking to it other than prostitutes.

The Met, Wolverhampton Street, Walsall.

Back in early May friend of the blog Sarah Sutherland sent me an Express & Star link saying that this place had launched a new menu and were offering 20% off the prices. I told her that I would look into it. It took me all of two days to get on it.

The bar was decked out in various nation flags. I wondered if there was any theme to them or just random but I spotted the flag of Georgia and deduced it was for Euro 2024. I grabbed and perused the menu. U2 came on performing “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For.” Well apologies Mr Bono, but I found what I was looking for straight away. The Big Brunch which was £11.49. I ordered it along with a tea. The 20% off didn’t seem to be in play and I couldn’t be arsed to query this.

The tea came quickly with the food shortly afterwards. Both were epic. Music was a right mixed bag ranging from “Grace Kelly” by Mika through to Billy Joel, Elton John, Communards and in a rare gap in my music knowledge “Angel Is A Centrefold” but I don’t know the artist for that one. “Tarzan Boy” by Baltimora is an absolute classic and nearly had me on the table dancing and belting it out. “Chelsea Dagger” by The Fratellis came on just as I was about to depart. Epic song by a band I love but not my favourite of theirs. Had it been “Baby Frattli” I’d have stayed and had a pint but instead I headed to W H Smith to buy a pack of whiteboard markers. That is probably the most middle aged sentence I have ever put on here.

Red Lion, Park Street, Walsall.

Had no idea ths place did food until Amanda Hignett visited and raved about it. It was June the first and I woke up peckish so decided it was time to try the food. Needless to say I’ve tried the beer in here loads of times.

Food doesn’t start until 11.30 and I was 15 minutes early but I was in no hurry. The all day breakfast was calling. They do a Belly Buster at £7.50 but it comes with chips but amazing as they are I don’t think they belong on a full English. So I went for the medium (£4.95 tea not included) with the usual bad guys held.

Also on the menu is a fish finger baguette which I’ve got to try at some point and they also do 2 for £12 meals which includes options like scampi or 3 lamb chops. Next time I’ve got a lovely lady in my life we are coming here for that. Mind I’ve not had a date since 2013 so I’m not holding my breath. I might go in, order two meals and then keep looking at my watch, glancing at the door and muttering “where is she?”. Then wolf down both meals while nobody is looking.

I sat at a table looking out onto Park Street which was busy with people heading to the continental market. The music was all 70’s disco stuff with a random 90’s track in the middle in the form of “U Can’t Touch This” by MC Hammer.

Breakfast was good. Once finished I still had a little plastic pot of milk left which I didn’t want to go to waste so I took the lid off and necked it like a shot. Yes I’m uncouth but I fancied a Calcium hit.

This is a great historic pub, apparently saved from demolition in the mid 90’s by a Walsall CAMRA campaign. I still have a picture of it on my phone when it was stood alone with everything around it gone. I can’t put it on here as it’s not mine but I’ll show it you when you see me. The spiral staircase in here is ace. I just wish they’d open upstairs again so we can use it.

To summarise well, with apologies to MC Hammer but breakfast at The Red Lion? You can touch this and I certainly did. Now to touch the fish finger baguette next time.

The White House. Bosty Lane, Walsall.

It was early June. I was making a rare appearance at a Walsall CAMRA meeting at The Manor Arms in Rushall, so no point in going home after work eh? I couldn’t go straight from Manor (Hospital) to Manor (Arms) though so opted to come here en route.

I like to make an entrance at pubs and I sure as hell did here. The doors were wide open with a television right in front. The Chase was on so of course I started to read the question rather than looking where I was going, and I didn’t notice a step which I went arse over tit over. I looked around and there were only two witnesses and neither of them pointed and laughed which I think actually disappointed me. And I didn’t get to finish reading the question either. I awarded myself a point anyway.

I went for a starter of crispy prawns and the main of a super steak. It came to about £22. The prawns were amazing. There is a offer where you can have 5 starters for £16.75. I might go back one day and have the crispy prawns 5 times and I wouldn’t care less if the person on the till or the waitress think I’m really odd.

The steak was good but they forgot the onion rings. I even checked the menu to make sure I hadn’t imagined their inclusion. I don’t like to query things so let it slide but I did dock them a point for this. Had they forgotten the steak though I would have had the place up. In hindsight I should have gone up the bar and queried this and offered to settle out of court for more crispy prawns.

Despite my unusual entrance and onionringgate this was a good visit. I even made a friend in the toilet on the way out. 3 urinals, he was at no 1 so I went to no 3 and he struck up conversation.

The King Arthur, Liskeard Road, Park Hall, Walsall.

Straight from work on Tuesday this week jobbie. My mate Chris was accompanying me and I would hate to suggest he was eager but he arrived at the pub bang on 5 while I was still languishing in the bus station. He had to make a snap decision. Go in for a pint or walk down and meet me at the bus stop. He chose the latter.

Things are never straightforward in my life. I got off the bus a stop early, and I just assumed that you walk up that hill and the pub would appear. Thankfully Chris was with me as there was left and right turns. I’d have ended up by The Longhorn. Organised Evans strikes again.

We got to the pub. The back room contains a pool table so we gave that a wide berth and marched into the front one. For a pub called the King Arthur I was disappointed that there was only two round tables and both small. Certainly not big enough to seat numerous Knights Of The Realm at. We sat at a rectangular table. I was hoping that we’d have a roped off VIP area following Chris’s appearance on Popmaster on Ken Bruce’s Greatest Hits Radio show on the Friday before but it was not to be. The barman must still be listening to Ken’s old station.

The menu is mostly Indian but there are staples like scampi and chips available. We perused. Chris said “shall we go halves and have the Kings Mixed Grill?” This is the biggest platter on the menu. “It’s got fish pakora on it. I’m on board.” “Well” he continued “I don’t eat that so you can have it all.” I was warming to this even more on a second by second basis. Motion carried.

The food came quickly and it was epic. The fish pakora was amazing but it was all good. We didn’t speak for a while but had the commentary from Turkey v Georgia to keep us company.

I didn’t want a pudding. Chris did. He asked what the Malai Kulfi is.He was informed that it’s ice cream. He probed further. “What’s the difference between that and the ice cream that is listed as ice cream?” “It’s made from milk.” We were both confused. He pressed further to be told you get three scoops of it, with all flavours. I now wanted in to find out what it was. It was indeed ice cream of 3 different flavours and it was delish.

There was an odd incident when I went to scratch my shoulder and somehow a bee landed on the inside of my hand which made me jump. Chrs sommented that my top had atracted it. It’s about time my clohes atrracted something I guess. This was the cue for Chris to start laying on some bee related puns and even the man on the next table waded in with one “he probably got here on a buzz route.”

I announced at this point that I would not be walking back to the bus. Fortunately Chris has something on his phone where you can order taxis without having to speak to someone. I’m not one for chatting to folk so will no doubt get round to embracing this technology in about 3 decades. He found a taxi 3 minutes away so after a toilet visit we departed.

We headed to Katz hoping to wish Mel a happy birthday and it was a successful mission. This was a fine evening.

While I’m on I must give a mention to the Eggs Benedict which is part of the Wetherspoons breakfast range. It’s ace and can be ordered without the rocket on top although this confused the hell out of the new barmaid last time. I now have this most Sundays. It started off as my post gym treat but after a couple of weeks I found that having a lie in, launching a blog, getting ready, walking to gym “mosiv” workout, shower then in Spoons before breakfast last orders at Midday was pushing it. So now it’s my pre gym treat along with numerous coffee’s.

Thanks for reading this. I did mean to review the food at The Black Country Arms but went on one of the days the kitchen is closed (Mondays and Sundays) and I was going to go to The Lyndon on Father’s Day but I was invited to Josh’s for an amazing beef and chicken dinner so did that instead. There could be a volume 2 of this and let’s be fair, I do enjoy the research.

Last Saturday I had a little tour of Sedgley for beers and a catch up with Amanda Hignett who I’d not seen since our wander around Wednesfield in 2022. If you missed that blog you can catch up on it here. The Tupperware line on it is still one of my favourite comments on this blog.

First up was a trip to Jack and Ada’s in Walsall town which was welcoming and epic as normal, then it was the 34 bus to Bilston. I worked for SciChem in Bilston for 21 years until they closed our office and moved it to the other side of Wolverhampton so it’s always nice to go back. Last time I went it was for an emergency trouser purchase ahead of my job interview at The Manor Hospital. I find Peacocks the best shop for trousers but they closed the one in Walsall to make way for an epic bowling alley so I headed to the one in Bilston. Typically they didn’t have my size or any deemed as close. I just chose the best option, meaning turning up for the interview in ill fitting trousers. They must have thought I used the same tailor as Rishi Sunak.

The 11.10 229 didn’t show so for old times sake I used Bilston bus station toilets to kill a few seconds. This brought back memories of the time I hopped off the bus one morning, needing a cheeky toilet. So I put my coin in the slot and yanked the door open. To be greeted by the sight of a man sat there having a good clear out. I don’t know who was more horrified. It comes to something when you are that desperate for a dump that you forget to lock the door. I closed up but of course I didn’t have another 10p coin so had to stop at McDonald’s. I had a sausage and egg McMuffin though while I was there.

The next bus turned up on time. The driver said it was his first time on the route and didn’t know where The Beacon Hotel was. Poo. I was a brave boy and asked people. Fortunately someone was going there so I followed him off and was in the pub just after midday. Amanda was already there so I nipped up the bar. Now I’m never likely to win any Mr Tall competitions but I had to crouch down to look through the serving hatch which was a novelty. I got a 4.0% golden ale (I forget the name) for £3.60, served in a proper jug style glass. And it was good.

We had a good catch up. I told Amanda some of my hopes, dreams, projects and general thoughts and it was a great chat. We were joined by Tony, Amanda’s ex husband but still good friend and the discussions continued.

The Beacon Hotel is a classic pub. Completely unspoiled and a must visit on any trip to Sedgley. Good beer at decent prices but what struck me most was how polite everyone was. Everyone that I stopped to let pass said “thank you” or “Cheers”. Cracking place.

We crossed the road to The White Lion Inn where a very pleasant pint of Salopian Hop Twister was served by an equally pleasant barmaid. We then ambled down to The Bulls Head. It was a pleasant stroll in the sun whilst Tony and Amanda gave me Halloween dressing up anecdotes but also pointed out buildings and gave facts about them. Pretty much like I do with visitors to Walsall. They are clearly as proud of their town as I am of mine and it’s great to see.

The Bulls Head is a Holden’s pub. The beer was crystal clear and in excellent nick. The barmaid is an Aldridge lass which gave us a conversation opportunity. The music was provided by Smooth Radio. I’d seen a post on Twitter in the week claiming “you know you’re old when you realise that Smooth Radio is banger after banger” and it was certainly the case. Huey Lewis “Stuck With You” and The Foundations “Baby Now That I’ve Found You” being the highlights.

Amanda told of her dad and how he likes to present “diabolical quizzes” which I really love the sound of, although anyone that ever attend any of my quiz nights at The Fitters Arms would probably say I’ve hosted some of those myself.

At the back of the pub is a Thai restaurant, complete with fish tank which brought back memories of the sadly missed Planet Spice in Walsall. Naturally I perused the menu.

Next up was The Red Lion. When I was doing the 147 snooker challenge using pubs with the colours in the names, this was one of my 15 reds. It was nice to revisit as this is probably the most me pub in town. It was fully decked out in England flags which I approved of. A local group of lads and lasses were having entertaining banter and the Thatchers Gold was immense.

We got talking about musical theatre and I mentioned that the favourite song that I’ve discovered since being in AMCS is Facade out of Jekyll And Hyde. A wonderful song with great lyrics and it helped that when we did it, I got a solo line right at the start. I would love to perform this song in full at some point. This was a good visit and I even got a high five off a very friendly Border Collie. I refuse to high five with people but it was cool getting one off a dog.

The Clifton is Sedgley’s Wetherspoons and that was next. A £2.36 pint of Butcombe “Gold” (4.4%) was my ale and I got a choice of glass which I’ve never known offered in Wetherspoons before. I went for handled jug again. We sat at a table with Amanda’s friends and had a laugh.

We had a pint in The Swan and moved onto The White Horse. This was very busy and according to Amanda boasting the only twin barmaids in town. This was another good pub and it had been a great day but it was time to start thinking about home. I had budgeted £30 for a taxi thinking I would be twatted after all the pubs but I fancied my chances on the bus, especially as it would only cost me 50p to cover a daysaver, having already tapped on two West Midlands Travel buses earlier in the day.

I left in time to get the no 1 to Wolverhampton and upon arrival a 529 to Walsall was in. Almost military style precision. Coming through Willenhall I had a text from my old mate Steve Stuart asking if I was about. Steve doesn’t live close by now so I don’t see him much nowadays but he did come to my Anecdotes Night in April. He said he was in The Registry so I headed there.

Inside was Steve but also Chris Garratt who I’ve not seen since we went to see Jerry Sadowitz in stand up in 2017. Also there was Leighton Williams who I haven’t seen since the late 90’s. It was a brief but enjoyable reunion, but they had to shoot off so I went home via Danny’s Chicken on Pool Street. I was in bed in time for Nick Abbott on LBC at 10pm, although I’ve got to be honest I may have nodded off during the news.

A great day. Cheers to all involved.

Saturday was good. Decent lie in then mugs of tea and You Tube music. We’d had Heart 90’s on at work in the week and I’d heard Show Me Love by Robyn (not the song of the same name by Robin S which I initially confused it with.) I’d played it loads since and it was looking to knock Nothing Matters by The Last Dinner Party off its perch as my most played tune of the week. Saturday was no exception and I was blasting i whilst ironing my t-shirt and giving it portions. I then left the house just as the door to door religious folks were arriving at the neighbours, so I missed them. Although I don’t answer my door anyway but it would have been hard to pretend I was out whilst singing Show Me Love at the top of my voice.

I headed into town on missions. Apparently I blanked a colleague on Park Street, Lizzy from Ward 4. Sorry Liz but in my defence I would have been in my own little world, focusing on breakfast and listening intently to hear if I got a mention from Sarah Champion on Absolute Radio (which I hadn’t by the time I reached the pub).

Breakfast was good and I will seriously consider reporting on it another time. Back out onto Park Street and the Continental Market was on. It’s good to see this back in town and despite people moaning about the prices on Facebook lots of folk were using the stands. My colleague Carole and I had been randomly talking about Turkish Delight in the week and then suddenly i was confronted by a stall full of it. I didn’t realise lemon Turkish Delight was a thing so it had to be done along with some of the more traditional rose flavour.

I went home. I meant to write. I meant to do garden work. I did neither. Had a rare bit of chill time. Craig came round at 6 and we headed straight for the Black Country Arms. Cider was the order of the day here, rotating between the Lilleys Pineapple and Apple & Pear varieties.. It was good to have a nice chat with the lovely April formerly of Walsall CAMRA in here and also to have a food discussion with friend of the blog Colin Walker.

Katz was next and we had a very pleasant hour outside, chatting with Jase and Mel.There was a live band on, which is the norm for Saturday nights in Katz but myself and Craig were startled when the lead singer jumped off the step into the yard and started belting out Judas Priest, a band fronted by Walsall lad Rob Halford. He did a good rendition whilst wandering around the garden with his cordless microphone, which was entertaining.

It was munchy time so we headed to Golden Moments although I still call it Golden Monsoon because Carl who I worked with at Corroy Products drunkenly misread the sign after my 21st birthday bash in 1995. Carl is a top lad and I’m so pleased we got back in touch recently after 24 years.

I wasn’t very hungry to be fair and Craig wasn’t feeling a curry with trimmings so we hit the starter menu. I went for white chicken tikka and a Nargis Kebab while Craig opted for a Tandoori Platter thing. The waiter’s mind was blown that we didn’t want main courses. We demolished the poppadoms although Craig said the red sauce was really hot and advised me not to try it. So of course I did. It was fine. I think Craig was being dramatic, I must be rubbing off on him.

The food came quickly and the waiter got his own back for the mind blowing as the Nargis Kebab was served with the omelette on the bottom which really threw me. This has never happened before. I made a point of putting some of it in it’s rightful place before proceeding. Craig necked his pint whilst I had barely touched mine and wanted photographic proof of this.

The food was great which is standard for that place. The bill came and Craig said “I’ll sort this if you get a couple of rounds of Baby Guinness in the Walsall Arms.” I was more than happy with this. I have had a Baby Guinness before but couldn’t tell you the ingredients.

We headed to The Walsall Arms. A decent singer was on and Jaz the landlady was serving which is always a bonus. I ordered our pints plus our Baby Guinness’s and asked Jaz what she wanted. She opted to join us in the shots. Craig got his card out and said “I’ll get these.” “No, I’ve got to get them as the curry house deal, plus I’m getting Jaz one.” “Don’t worry about it” he said. So I didn’t.

The shots were ace and the beer good. I repeated the order only for Jaz to say “I’ll sort the shots out.” Keeping my side of the bargain was proving problematic. I think I managed it in the end. It was epic having shots with you Jaz.

I think we stayed about an hour. It was a cracking day but despite the research, I still don’t know the ingredients of a Baby Guinness.

The title is slightly inaccurate. I’ve also had a small amount of alcohol on a strictly just to be sociable basis.

I’ve been off work this week celebrating my 50th birthday and on Sunday it was a BBQ at Josh and Lyndsey’s house with myself in attendance along with our great mates Laura and Pezza. It was a great afternoon and we were well fed and watered which is standard for one of Josh’s BBQ’s. Afterwards I popped to The Walsall Arms for a quick couple and Jaz the landlady was the first person to buy me a pint on my birthday week.

On the Monday Josh announced to Lyndsey that there was still a lot of meat left. “Is Evo coming around again then?” she laughed. Fair play to Lyndsey she gets the situation. Food cannot be wasted so it was another good feed washed down with 4 episodes of Baby Reindeer. Neither of us were prepared for the events of episode 4 so we had to dash to the Walsall Arms for a pint afterwards.

I don’t recall how it cropped up but on that Monday I’d told Josh and Lyndsey about how at primary school I seemed to be the only kid who liked Semolina so the dinner ladies who I got on well with used to let me eat it all. I would be left on my own in the dining area shovelling this down me while all the other children were outside playing. Of course the downside of this was on the Friday when the boss turned up to asses how the week had gone it would have been like “oh, all the Semolina went again? Bloody hell it goes down a storm here doesn’t it? Better do it again next week.” So apologies to all my primary school friends for how often we had it. Josh had never heard of it and took to Google to try and find out what it was. He couldn’t quite get his mouth round the pronunciation of it coming out with a word which sounded more like salmonella. Had it been called that it might even have put me off. I vowed to get a tin for him to try.

On Tuesday Josh came to mine for a full English breakfast. I’m generally good at cooking these but on one of his more recent visits he threw me by requesting a slice of toast and all was going well until I came to cook this. It unravelled quickly, I spilled baked beans all over the work surface and ended up having a mini meltdown.

I’ve coped better with the toast request since but on this occasion I didn’t suggest breakfast until quarter to midnight so didn’t have time to buy bread which gave me the perfect get out clause.

Post breakfast I headed to the gym to work off some of that goodness. Alas my favourite piece of equipment was out of order. I don’t know what it’s called but it’s the one where you sit down and use your legs to push yourself up the incline. It’s probably got a technical name but I call it the sit down pushy up thing. With that out my routine was reduced. I didn’t want the lady on Reception to think I’d had a shorter than usual work out though so I hid in a toilet cubicle for 20 minutes and checked my social media feeds. Putting the toilet seat down must have burned off a calorie.

On the evening I went to ASDA. I had my personal radio on which is standard and Absolute was playing. I usually sing along, sometimes louder than others. This time on came my favourite song of the moment Nothing Matters by The Last Dinner Party, which reached the chorus as I approached the bread aisle. Forgetting where I was I sang along to the chorus line of “and I will fuck you, like nothing matters.” A couple of women grabbed bread and scurried off. Sorry ladies if I startled you into buy loaves with a shorter shelf life than you usually prefer.

Wednesday was the big day so I headed to Jack & Ada’s. I couldn’t have a full English two days running so opted for poached egg on toast which is divine in there. Paul and Sam were their usual welcoming selves and the first song to be played was I Only Want To Be With You by Dusty Springfield which is magnificent.

I popped to work to drop some cakes in, as I couldn’t be arsed with the hassle of either buying them the night before or on the way to work. The plan had been to buy proper cream cakes but the fridge in the cake section is now filled with booze so Mr Kipling came to the rescue. It only occurred to me on Friday that cream cakes might be in the proper fridge area nowadays but at least I tried.

It was nice to see David and Carole at work and a few other colleagues. Josh then came to pick me up. He was a bit disappointed as he wanted to surprise me with a hot pork bap from the epic food van on Queen Street but it wasn’t there. He thinks he is cursed with that van as since I introduced him to it in January he’s tried to use it 3 times but without luck. If you see it though, it’s worth a visit.

We went back to Josh’s and he gave me ace presents and food. I got home and my mate Morty turned up to give me my card, which he’d forgotten but he gave me a lit to Katz, where I was heading for steak night which occurs every Wednesday.

Woza popped in to have a quick birthday pint with me and then it was upstairs which Jase the landlord had set aside to make it a more private event. Jase, his wife Mel, Asps, Ralph, Becki and Jon headed up there for goodness. As my steak was served it was brought in with a candle in it and they sang happy birthday. I was just pleased that they hadn’t put 50 candles on it or it might have been cooked a bit more than the medium rare that I like. The steak was ace and Ralph paid for it which was very much appreciated. Cheers Ralph.

Chris joined us for a post steak pint and then we all headed up to the Walsall Arms where Josh was waiting. I wasn’t expecting to see him so that was ace, and it was a great day.

On Thursday I headed to Prince Of Wales theatre in Cannock to see my AMCS buddies perform their current show Stages Through The Ages. It was a mixture of songs from shows dating from 1927 to modern times. It was great too see friends in the audience and performing. I’m not currently an active member of AMCS but I miss seeing everyone and being on stage but I’ve written a daft show which I need to focus on for the time being. I’ve done 13 shows with AMCS but that isn’t a number I can stick on. I might return for the late 2025 panto.

Afterwards it was a quick dash to the station as the show finished earlier than I expected and I though I could just make the 22.03 chuff chuff. I did with minutes to spare. Oh great I thought. I’ll be back in Walsall well ahead of schedule. Of course, nothing is straight forward in my life. I wasn’t paying attention to where the train was going, and I didn’t look out of the windows as I was fannying around on my phone. I heard the announcement “next stop is Walsall” and glanced up at the on board sign which also confirmed this. I pushed the button, the doors opened and I prepared to set foot in the Promised Land again. Only to be confronted by a big sign saying Tame Bridge Parkway. Two stations after Walsall. I dashed to platform 2 in case a train was due but it was 12 minutes away. Giving me time to reflect on my life choices. I then wondered if an inspector would be on the train. But then shrugged thinking I’ve got my tickets to and from Cannock, this is their fault. If they think I’m paying to get back to Walsall they can suck my chopper. I’m very anti fare dodging but this time I felt justified. There was no inspector on board.

It didn’t take long to get back and the good thing was that the train I was on now pulled into platform 1 which meant a straight walk off the platform onto the street. The train from Cannock would have plonked me on platform 2 which would have meant walking up the stairs and down the corridor. Oh my God, you read that right. I just made a positive slant on a situation. My friends will tell you that in every situation I will always look for the negative angle but a few of them have commented how my outlook has improved these last few months. There may be more positivity in the blogs to come but don’t hold your breath. When I first typed the p word in that last sentence I got the red line underneath. I right clicked but thee word I wanted didn’t come up. I had another couple of goes at spelling it, even chucking in an e at one point as e’s are good e’s are good but this didn’t work. I got the dictionary out to check and it was right 1st time. Even my pc can’t cope with me being positive.

Friday was the big birthday bash so it was back to The Walsall Arms. The first hour or so was spent outside with discussions ranging from me being urged to have a go at stand up comedy through to football and season tickets. Andy came up with the great idea of Walsall FC issuing season tickets just for the Bescot Bar, so you could have the match day experience of the booze and seeing lots of friends but without having to watch the match. I bet there would be a good take up.

There was a good turnout from my friends and also a surprise appearance from my cousins who I’ve not seen since a funeral in 2021 so that was nice. Then the karaoke started and I was first up. I’ve long wanted to sing “I Touch Myself” by Divinyls and this seemed as good a time as any. I didn’t quite get my voice right in the first verse but then it clicked and I nailed the rest and it went down a storm.

I was then presented with a cake by Jaz while everyone sang happy birthday which was a lovely moment. Everybody by Backstreet Boys is very much my go to karaoke song and Sean put it down for us to do together. Gotta love Sean. Two weeks earlier his band Delayed Response which he is the singer of were playing the reopening night of The Watering Trough and now here he was singing Backstreet Boys with me. I sang How We Do by Rita Ora (known locally as Rita O Ar) as I was up for party and bullshit but this one didn’t really work. Late on me and Sean duet-ted again, this time on Caravan Of Love. Audience participation on this one was immense and it was an absolute blast. Rounded off a brilliant night in a cracking manner. The plan had been to move on around half 9 but everyone was enjoying it so we stayed and I think that worked well.

Yesterday Craig came and we popped to the Black Country Arms and had a pleasant pint outside and then headed to Katz. There was live music on in the form of an Iron Maiden tribute band. They started just as we were about to leave so I said “we can’t go now as everyone will point and say look at those old men leaving cause the music is too loud.” Then another couple left so we were fine. We were on a tight schedule to get food and be in the Walsall Arms in time for the boxing.

We went to what was Gurkha Bhojan which is now called Gurkha Mountain, which was hand as they only had to change half the sign. I know this was the case as I saw them doing it. There is now a tv screen above the bar and stools at it but other than that the lay out is the same. The music? Well it was the kind of sad soft music that you get in a crem pre funeral. It was really odd. The drink menus still had the old name on but the food ones were new.

We got poppadoms but these didn’t seem the freshest. I went for a chicken tikka masalla. The music didn’t improve, “I can’t believe I’m spending the first Saturday in my 50’s listening to this” was one of the few comments we made on this subject. I half expected Gerrard Way, lead singer of My Chemical Romance to come in and start filming the Helena video. With the depressing music not abating it dawned on me that I’m now old enough to go on a Saga cruise and started to wonder if I would get a free pen with my curry.

Finally Craig had enough and asked if the waitress could change the music. She gave him a couple of options, he just said “anything more upbeat please”, She agreed and walked off and then didn’t change it. My curry was nice and got demolished but Craig said his was too spicy. Odd visit.

The Walsall Arms was busy and vibrant. We got good seats and I thought Fury controlled the fight but those 40 seconds when Usyk punched him all round the ring cost him. I thought it would be a draw from the judges. Decent night this and Craig paid for all the food and drinks as a birthday present. Cheers Craig. Top man. I first met Craig in 1992 at Steve Stuart’s 18th birthday bash and it was the night Lennox Lewis fought Razor Ruddock. Steve didn’t have Sky so we listened to it on Radio 5 and got two of the lads to act it out to the commentary which was very entertaining. It’s only taken us 32 years to have more boxing action together.

It’s been a fantastic week. Thanks to everyone who has been involved. Back on the straight and narrow now. Be interesting to see if my work trousers still fit me tomorrow. It might be touch and go, and I’m not doing Divinyls thoughts there.

I’m 50 this week, but the celebrations started on Friday when Swill my best friend of 45 years offered to take me out round Bloxwich. Naturally I accepted without hesitation. He picked me up and off we set.

First up was The Beacon Way. Swill looked behind the bar and exclaimed “ooh, what have we got here?” I thought he had spotted an exciting beer in the fridge but it was actually a dog. The barmaid was friendly and whist being served Annette the lovely landlady came over and asked how my anecdotes night went. (I recently did 3 hours of stories about my life in a private event in Katz which went down well). She offered me the room if I ever wanted to do another one. I’d better start chatting up the women to get more material.

Swill mentioned that I could do a quiz in there which was very spooky timing as only the night before I’d been thinking about quiz nights and how I’d love to do one more having not hosted one since 2014, but having done them regularly for the previous 15 years. Annette was up for this as she is currently quizzless but does like them. I’ll give this some thought.

Great pub this and I should use it more. They do cracking looking pork and stuffing baps on Mondays and Tuesdays, and with the 32 bus from Walsall dropping off and picking up right outside, I will deffo be going back soon to try these.

Swill parked up at his house and we walked to The Queens Head. The front outside area is now astro turfed with new benches so we opted for that all too rare pint in the sun. And very pleasant it was too. I used the loo before moving on and made a mess of getting back out of the pub, mistaking a glass/wooden panel for the door. Not a good look but it did spark a conversation with a lass who is a fellow Walsall FC fan who said she knows me from how long I spend in the bar at the games. We had a quick footie chat and she told me of the discos and karaokes in this place and invited me back and we exchanged names. Nice to meet you Nicky. I didn’t think to get her chaps name though. I made it out the pub easily this time.

New Invention Brewery was next. Our friends Sean and Lauren were in which was nice and the most important discussion of the night occurred i.e where are we watching the Euros? A vital chat I’m sure you’ll agree.

Next up was The Wheatsheaf and another outside pint. They had a live singer on and she was just starting Build Me Up Buttercup as we departed. Absolute classic but time was against us so we couldn’t hang around.

The pre curry pint was in the Hatherton Arms, which Swill has never been in. I went in this pub on pub 365 challenge volume 1 in 2010 and then it dropped off my radar until I started working at Cardboard Boxes 2 Go and the delightful Shelley Large told me about it and I started gong. The Monday afternoon karaoke and bingo is legendary. This is what is known as a proper pub and it’s very pro Walsall FC which is good. Someone was singing Poison by Alice Cooper as we walked in which was good but the highlight was a couple doing the Arctic Monkeys classis Mardy Bum.

Swill recently did my family tree and he discovered that my great grandfather Noah must have been a regular in here as when he died the family thanked the licencees and customers of this pub in the obituary in the Walsal Observer. Swill likes the idea that Noah would walk in here after a hard day down the mine and get chants of “Evo Evo Evo” like I do nowadays.

Super pub this and we were having a great time but we had to be in the curry house for 10.30 so we supped up and sodded off.

Ashoca is Swill’s favourite curry house and he knows the staff well. It was my first visit so the waiter actually took the time to sit at our table and go through what I wanted from my curry which was decent of him. I’m a simple man in this respect. Just meat and sauce. No shit like onion or tomato. Swill mentioned that I like a boiled egg and that was it, a chicken and boiled egg curry was on the way.

I normally like chappatis with curry but I have recently started experimenting with cheese naan. I’ve never had a keema one of these so when I spotted cheese and keema naan on the menu it had to be done.

The food was amazing and Swill paid for it as a birthday present. Cheers geezer. Great visit but I did have to deduct a point for not getting a chocolate at the end.

We popped next door to Wetherspoons to round the night off with gin. In here we discussed all sorts of stuff. Life, the universe, everything. Swill has always had a thing for the Northern Lights and he got excited at the end when pictures of it came up on his Facebook feed. He tried to show me, but I’m a philistine and couldn’t have been less interested. I had gin to focus on.

Swill ordered me a taxi which came quickly but I was slightly alarmed when the driver didn’t know where I lived. My sense of direction isn’t the best, hence my attempt at leaving The Queens earlier but as I was paying for this, a mis-direct could cost me money so I was bang on and got home quickly.

I treated myself to I Like It by Narcotic Thrust and then went off to kip. A great night indeed. It’s very rare for me and Swill to have a just us night so it was very much appreciated. Bloxwich I’ll be back soon. Annette, save me a pork and stuffing bap please.