Evo Boozy Scribbler

It was an up and out early jobbie last Saturday. I had to be at The Square Peg in Birmingham at 11 to meet Shaz. Shaz is one of my longest standing friends having met her at a concert in 1990 but I hadn’t seen her since the legendary Great Barr day last Summer where it’s fair to say that I reached advanced levels of refreshment. Also I’d not been in The Peg since it reopened after refurbishment so it was exciting all round.

I arrived bang on time and ventured in wondering how the place would look. I find that modern day pub refurbs follow the same blue print. I.e remove any semblance of character and make it shit but this place had kept it’s features which was nice.

I got served straight away and headed for the coffee machine with my mug. Considering how drunk I got last time I saw Shaz, this time I was being good and just having latte’s. I touched the screen, stepped back and awaited my drink. I noticed it wasn’t coming and zoned back into the situation. Unlike the coffee machine in Walsall Wetherspoon this one was eager for more knowledge. Firstly caffeinated or decaffeinated? It’s never going to be decaff is it George? Then hot or cold. I couldn’t cope with this. I have a strict no decision making before midday at weekends policy but I put this aside, sated the machines thirst for knowledge and finally got my drink.

Shaz was already in and we had a great 90 minutes (not often a Walsall fan can say that) catching up, talking old memories and there was even an interjection of a poached egg recipe from Shaz after I expressed my desire to be able to cook those. Last time I tried to cook a poached egg it turned out like a lava lamp. My brother who is a Head Chef in a hotel in Eastbourne more than hoovered up the cooking skills in our family. I can only mash potato when dancing to Do You Love Me?

I went to the bog, and they are very smart. There is a full length mirror by the door which is adjacent to the urinals and I found that with just a small turn of the head I could admire myself whilst in full flow. I pray that I am not the only person to do this.

Shaz ordered a drink via the app, which is a bit new fangled for me. I like going up the bar, especially as outside of work ordering drinks is one of the few times females talk to me. I grabbed another latte and returned.

I’d had the Duran Duran classic New Moon On Monday in my head all day and I kept bursting into the chorus figuring that Shaz wouldn’t mind as she is a big fan of said group. I did apologise but pointed out that it’s their best song. “Actually, that’s Save A Prayer” was Shaz’s response. Now one thing that this blog site of mine is consistently short off is controversial outbursts so thanks Shaz for providing my readers with one. I did point out that we live in a democratic country so she is allowed to be wrong.

Shaz departed as she had missions. I grabbed a hot chocolate as I like value from my refillable hot drink Wetherspoons cup. I was in no hurry. I must point out now ladies and gentlemen that the staying on the latte’s was only a limited time offer while I was with Shaz. Booze was always to follow. The plan was to continue on to Hockley and get the last two pubs in that I needed to complete a blog I’ve been working on since last March but then Craig text asking what I was up to and did I want to meet up later for Walsall beers. I knew that this would involve curry and I’ve not seen Crags since January so sorry Hockley but I was heading back to good ole DH.

I hadn’t planned on being in the house this afternoon so I had some rare settee time and treated myself to “Like You Do” the best of Lightning Seeds album. So many wonderful songs with Sugar Coated Iceberg and Sense being the best two imo. Sense is amazing as is the Terry Hall version of it. Next time I’m in a relationship this will be one of my anthems but then again my last missus was back in 2007 so I’m not holding my breath on that front.

Crags arrived and we headed straight to Walsall Arms, Jaz the landlady was serving which is always a delight, and the music in there must have been tailored to my needs. The La’s, Blur and Kaiser Chiefs all figured. It was very pleasant and we stayed for a second.

Katz was next and we arrived just in time to see the England winning drop goal in the rugby which was nice. They were out of Wainwrights though. I can only imagine someone had cleaned it out by drinking loads of it the day before after Jase, the landlord’s wedding. The main room was busy with an event, with many in attendance including Mel, Jase’s now wife.

We hit the bar. Some men joined us who steered the conversation towards Premier League football which I wasn’t interested in. Craig had set me a challenge to name 20 of the 27 countries in the world where the capital city begins with the same letter as the name of the country, so I went into stand by mode and thought about that. I eventually got about 15 with Andorra (Andorra la Vella) being my favourite although when I mentioned Greenland and not being sure if Nuuk or Godthab is the English word for the capital, this was disallowed as Greenland is a Danish territory not a country. Had this been ruled out by the linesman putting his flag up late the fans would have rioted.

With the Wainwrights off we had Farmer Jim’s pear and passion fruit cider cider which was very good. Craig asked me a question about vegetables. I’m okay with capital cities, vegetables less so be it eating or knowledge of them. I didn’t get the answer which was cauliflower. This would be like asking Superman a question about Kryptonite. Glad I didn’t know it.

We moved on and headed into town The shutter was up on Chambers which used to be Bar Sport which I’ve not managed to tick off since it reopened due to not actually catching it open. Music was playing loudly but as soon as Craig tried the (albeit locked) door it immediately stopped mid song. Someone must have been watching. Quick pretend we’re closed. The little bald prick out the two of them will clean us out of Wainwrights. Please note, as I’ve not been in, I don’t know if they actually do Wainwrights. As we walked away the music started again.

We had a quick pint in St Matts Hall, the Walsall Wetherspoon and there was no latte for me this time.

We ended up in Gurkha Bhojan. I nipped to the loo and by the time I came out Craig had become best mates with the waiter. They chatted about everything. As you know I’m not one for talking to people I don’t know so was more than happy with this. I thought they were going to start swapping recipes at one point. Now that would have got me involved as I now know one for poached eggs.

I had tandoori chicken, chicken tikka massala and cheese naan. The food was amazing with the cheese naan being the best I’ve ever had. Craig paid for the food in exchange for me paying for the taxi back to mine. Terms I was more than happy with.

Splendid day. Sorry Hockley, I will come to you soon and as I write this a week later I still haven’t had poached eggs.

The Registry (formerly Yates’s) in Leicester Street have recently started doing Sunday dinners. I’ve eaten there lots of times before, the current 3 starters for £10.99 is superb and does me for a meal in itself but I thought I’d give the Sunday dinner a whirl.

When I used to eat there on a Monday, post work and pre CAMRA/Friends Of Highgate Brewery meet ups I’d sit on the first table behind the stairs, but on a Thursday it’s always table 14 by the window. I had no Sunday strategy. I pondered the Walsall FC booth but someone was in it, as was a group at table 14 so opted for number 12 in front of the big screen. It had to be an even number.

I hadn’t seen the barmaid before before but she was friendly and efficient and then it was back to the table for menu time.

The turkey is cheapest, then pork and finally beef although a combination of all 3 can be ordered. Sides such as pigs in blankets (yum yum) cauliflower cheese (no thanks George) and stuffing can also be added. You can also ask for more Yorkshire puddings and roast potatoes which is a nice additional option.

I went for pork and although lots of vegetables are included I asked for these to be withheld. The food came out quickly, served by Manager and all round top lad Matt Morris-Higgins. He did query the lack of vegetables but I assured him I was more than happy with what I’d got. The plate was huge. I immediately thought of the episode of I’m Alan Partridge where he moans about the small plates at the hotel breakfast buffet so he takes his own big plate. Well he’d have been impressed at the size pf this one.

As with any meal of this nature the acid test is the roast potatoes. Pleased to say that potatoes in The Registry passed this test. The pork was lovely and the Yorkshire puddings absolutely bang on.

The music was modern stuff but then long time staff memeber and local legend Carl Bob went behind the decks for a second. He must have pressed a button as the music changed to Voice Of The Beehive and Sheryl Crow. All good.

Desserts are available, the honeycomb cheesecake sounded amazing but I opted to be a good boy and miss out on that. I was in view of the the two poles at the front of the dance floor and considered having a few spins round one of those to burn off some of the dinner but there were a few people in and nobody wanted to see that.

There was two real ales on but I stuck to the Thatchers cider which really hit the spot. Dinners are served until 9pm so you can rock up even later than I did and still get fed. The dinner was very yummy and filling. Thanks to all of the staff.

Bek’s is a long established chip shop on Wolverhampton Street in Darlaston. Last year they opened their first franchise with a new shop in Aldridge. This arrangement recently came to an end with the Aldridge store taking on a new name. I decided to revisit both places to see which was best in an exciting head to head, belt busting investigation.

Bek’s. 10A Wolverhampton Street, Darlaston.

I’d been pondering this blog since the break up was announced by both parties on Facebook. Friday the 23rd was pay day. It was drizzling as I left work. I could have ambled home in the rain, or simply crossed the road and jumped on the 39 which would drop me by Bek’s. I gave myself the casting vote and opted for the latter.

This was my 3rd visit to original Bek’s but my first time reviewing it. I’d meant to on the maiden visit but that time I couldn’t get a shot of the exterior of the shop as there was a lass wearing jeans in the window and I didn’t want passers by thinking I was taking a picture of her arse. On the second visit I was just too excited.

There were no customers as I arrived this time so I got served straight away. On the first visit we had the additional entertainment of a drunk version of Mavis from Open All Hours trying to decide what he wanted to order so it was a shame he wasn’t about.

Cheesy Chips leapt out of the menu at me but I’d seen a Facebook post a couple of days earlier boasting of Bek’s new secret thick tasty chicken coating so I went for 2 pieces of that with battered chips. I’m currently trying to see how long I can go without a KFC (day 33 as I type this) so this was an easy decision.

I wasn’t expecting a drink but he handed me a paper cup and pointed me in the direction of the self service machine. I’ve not drank pop in over a year so went for the sugar free option of Pepsi Max as I love that even though the current “make it better” radio ads infuriate me. The meal came to £6.70.

The lad serving was very pleasant and wished me a good weekend as I left, and I love little things like that. The bag he handed me with the food in was huge. Anybody going past would have pointed and muttered “look how much food he’s got. Hope it’s not all for him the fat fuck.”

The food then? Lots of battered chips which were epic and the chicken, well it was two decent sized pieces and I thoroughly enjoyed the lot. If I still lived and worked in Darlaston I’d be here all the time. My Bank Manager and Doctor however are probably chuffed that I don’t.

The Parade, 8 Croft Parade Aldridge.

What was Bek’s in Aldridge is now called The Parade. When it opened as Bek’s myself and a former friend visited on the second day. As I shovelled my food down me he seemed more interested in trying to make friends with every customer that walked in. I remember thinking leave them alone, they want to order their fish and chips in peace then go home and demolish them. I did ponder the following week if there were discussions along the lines of “shall we go to Bek’s again?” “God no, that odd man might be there again.

I arrived this time a bit damp as it was raining. Standard behaviour from Mother Nature these days. A family were being served affording me time to study the menu. I wanted chicken and chips again (a) so I could do a like for like comparison and (b) as I’m still doing KFC cold turkey – day 40 as I write this. I feel like Jesus in the desert.

I appreciate that my eyesight has seen better days but I really couldn’t see chicken and chips on the menu. When I got served the lady confirmed they don’t do it. They only do chicken in nugget, strips or burger form. I don’t mind ordering nuggets in McDonalds but in a chip shop it feels it seems a bit kids menuesque for me so I went for the mini fish. chips and gravy which came to £5.50.

Service was quick and to doge the rain I opted to eat in. All the Bek’s history has gone off the wall to be replaced by a big picture of what I assume to be an American city.

The sexy yellow chairs remain though so I plonked myself down in the same position as my previous visit, I like consistency like that. The music was Heart FM and the first song was “This Love” by Maroon 5, a band in joint second place on my list of artists I’ve seen live the most times so no problem there.

Food was good, fish was amazing and at the bottom of the box was some of those battered bits that are so delish.

This was another good visit and with it’s location a couple of the doors away from the epic Turtles Head micropub it’s a good option when visiting Aldridge.

So which is best? I’m going to go all Harry Hill. I like Bek’s. I like The Parade. “Fiiiiight”. I’m going to cop out to be honest. I saw a reply on Twitter once to the ongoing who is better Ronaldo or Messi debate which was “can’t we just enjoy both?” and that’s the angle I’m going for here.

The Saddlers Club closed a few years ago and lay dormant until last year when work began on refurbishing it and it opened again on Boxing Day to a limited number of customers. Early reports weren’t good with comments being it looked bare and the seating being like a school canteen. It opened again against Wrexham before being given its official opening in January and by now new decor had been applied to the walls to make it look a bit more welcoming to us Saddlers.

Now called The Locker, season ticket holders and participants in the Walsall FC membership scheme can gain entry to the club for free but for all other patrons there is a £5 charge to enter, so it took me a while to venture in but after Tuesday’s dramatic late win over Accrington Stanley it was time to give it a whirl, although this decision was made easier by the club now closing the Bescot Bar after half time.

The foyer, the desk has gone as has the pay phone though the latter I guess being a victim of the times. It looks big and barren now but if any disgruntled away fans want a post match game of Twister with a Walsall fan to try and claim some kind of victory to take home, this space would be ideal. Plenty of room for angry onlookers and handy for the toilets.

I tried to venture in to what was the members room but it was in darkness. Apparently it’s been gutted with the pool room and darts sections now merged into the room.

So into the back room. The raised seating area has gone, as has the carpet and the stage. No soft furnishings now, it’s just hard benches. Paddy McGuinness says in his current On The Beach advert something like his buttocks were built for luxury so he won’t be popping in any time soon.
The bar is in the same place and there were a few people queuing as you would expect straight after the match and they were all served quickly. I joined my ace Niece Amber, Laura and Badge (that’s all I know him as) and it was mentioned that the room is different but feels the same and it’s right. I could still picture the long UTS table that used to run up the middle of the room.

The good thing about this being open and the other hospitality bars being closed post match is it means being able to see people that sit in other parts of the ground which was ace. Even seeing friend of the blog Coxy who I aint seen for yonks.

I got a round in and was looking forward to trying a NoFo beer, a brewery based in Georgia, USA that we all thought were going to be supplying an ale or two in here but it was just the standard fare. NoFo sponsor our training tops and their Twitter account @NoFoBrewCo proudly boasts we’m Walsall in their bio.

Beer is served in plastic glasses but at least they are the sturdy ones and not the type that you can squeeze as easily as dog shit in a poo bag. Please note that I have never done that, it was the first analogy that came to mind.

On to the toilets then. They were still pristine and smelt new. 3 cubicles but I didn’t check the status of door locks and toilet roll levels, having been disappointed by these aspects in the past. Square sinks, I love a square sink and two powerful hand driers. Not quite as sexy as Dyson Airblades but still good. I don’t mind missing out on the Airblades if the difference in cost is put towards signing Dave Okagbue in the Summer. I did want to take a picture of these pristine toilets but by the time I’d dried my hands another user was in. As you know from previous blogs, I get scared trying to take pictures of the outside of take aways so wasn’t going to take a shot of the loos when a man is at the urinal trough with his willy out.

So to summarise, I like the place. Maybe pad the benches and that will help. I’m pondering getting a season ticker for 24/25 so I can use this place at my leisure in the future. Hello, it’s early bird time already. I might sell my body to raise the £350 cost, but it would be worth it.

If you’re heading in The Locker before or after today’s game against Doncaster, have a good un. Come on you Saddlers.

I missed the Walsall v Mansfield match last Saturday, partially because I thought we’d get dicked and because I have a run of busy Saturdays coming up but I wanted to get another Brownhills visit in.

I took a leisurely stroll into town, making a slight diversion to take in Tower Street. I’ve recently joined the gym at the Gala Baths and I know that the exercise bikes in there look out onto the street so I make a point of walking past when in town even if I’m not going in. I like to think that this gives my gym buddies on the bikes something to admire while they are peddling furiously.

I was listening to Emily Dean on Absolute Radio, a lady whose voice I could listen to all day, this wasn’t an option though as she finished at 11 the same time as the number 10 to Brownhills which I made easily.

First up was Morgan’s Coffee Shop for breakfast. I visited this place last February and have been wanting to come back ever since. It was busy but there was a seat at the window. I needed the largest breakfast and mug of tea going and with both ordered I sat down and enjoyed watching the world go by.

There was a good mixture of people in and whilst I’m no eavesdropper there was some hood conversations going on which added to the ambience. The breakfast came quickly and was really enjoyable. It was another successful visit though I had to drag myself away at the end as the home made cakes looked amazing.

I strolled round to The Swan. Great pub but I’ve not been since the pre opening night jolly. As I’ve said before I’m a disciple to Salopian Brewery and they had a new beer of theirs on Broken Promise. Now I’ve received tons of broken promises in my life but this was a first in booze form. I surveyed the pub it was already busy but there was a section that was completely customer free. Perfect. I knew where I was heading. The beer was good and I enjoyed gathering my thoughts after a busy week.

Next up was The Jiggers Whistle. Another reason for today’s mission was to apologise to Colin and Teresa here for dropping out of the recent CAMRA Branch Meeting that they hosted, at the last minute. I grabbed a Green Duck ale and settled down. The music was superb in here, a real cross section of stuff and I liked it all. the highlight was The Housemartins “Happy Hour”.What an absolute tune.

There are no fruit machines in The Jiggers, I don’t play them anyway but I had a go on another type, put a quid in and won a tub of BBQ Pringles. Epic. The Jiggers appears to have the Walsall CAMRA Cider Pub Of The Year award bolted to the place and I always have a pint of cider to reflect this, but this time a curve ball arrived. A man walked in and ordered the Wye Valley 1985 lager, which I’ve not had since Jase had it on in Katz. It’s a beautiful drink, some friends of mine had been to see Bowling For Soup the night before and my favourite song of theirs is 1985, so I took this as beings God’s way of telling me to have a pint of it. So I did. And it was ace.

Shoulder Of Mutton was next. A pub I was scared in on my first visit, but on the second I was befriended by a local before I’d even got through the door and he gave me the nickname Noddy. I enjoyed that and every subsequent visit and this was no exception. Very busy so I perched on a stool at the end of the bar. No football scores show in here. The big televisions were showing either horse racing or the big Rugby Union M5 Derby between Exeter and Gloucester. At this point can I jst mention that I hate the M5? It’s shit.

I checked the Walsall score for the first time and yeah that match we were going to get dicked in? We were winning. The usual Walsalll FC way. Very enjoyable pint in here. atmos was good and there was a women in that reminded me of a lass I’m very keen on. Music was a bit random though and the only song I knew was Sultans Of Swing by Dire Straits which is ace.

I got a message. Josh was driving back from Hednesford through Brownhills and did I want a lift? I asked how long he’d be. He said 20 minutes. 20 minutes? Long enough for two pints. I supped up and dashed out in to the rain that wasn’t happening when I walked in.

The Jack Jigger Taylor is run by the same company as The Tap & Tanner in town so I didn’t need to check the beer range. I got served straight away and Inch’s was in order. Josh messaged to say he was outside. The 20 minutes had turned into about 7. I started necking so it was only a quick visit but long enough for Alex, nephew of the late great Clive Welch to come over to say hello. I’ve not seen him since the funeral so it was good to have a quick chat with him. Highlight of the day.

I met up with Josh, he dropped me off outside Katz and I had a couple of pleasant beers and some Walsall FC chat before heading home a very happy boy.

Friday was a random day at work with me showing off my now slightly developing biceps to my boss Dave and also comments about going up the back passage to the ever wonderful Carole. Half 4 soon came around and it was time to start the 5 day weekend. I was leaving work by a different way and for the first time going up the aforementioned back passage. I can get lost just returning from the toilets in a pub so wasn’t sure of where to go taking this route. Carole had assured me it was straightforward and offered to take me but at half 4 I was still fannying around with delivery notes and folders so I went solo and actually found the way. Sounds soft I know but the 3 Wise Men were going to see Jesus and they needed a star to show them the way so you know, we all need guidance occasionally.

It’s always good when the first post work radio song is a tune, and the Music Gods must have been in a great mood as on came Just A Day by Feeder which is a belter.

I walked along Pleck Road. Someone had decided to decorate the pavement with a pack of playing cards which was jolly nice of them. Some of them were face down and the Ace Of Spades is believed to be a sign of power and authority so needless to say this was one of the ones that evaded my sight.

As I approached St John’s Road, I looked left and right, always follow The Green Cross Code as I’m a good boy and I stepped into the road. A car decided that he didn’t want to wait in the line of traffic waiting at a red light and drove on the other side of Pleck Road before turning into the road I was crossing and I only saw him at the last second. It’s been decades since I read the Highway Code but I’m pretty sure that manoeuvre isn’t recommended in there.

I carried on noticing that the excellent chip shop Mother Hubbards is no more, now called Uncle Phil’s. I’ll have to give that a re-tick when I’m back on the chip shop reviews.

Absolute Radio announced that Duran Duran were coming on. I was at Champy’s just 20 minutes after leaving work. Why, when I work so close has it taken me 9 months to have a post clocking off trip? I stopped to take the obligatory picture and then saw Jo Collins, one of the first people to befriend me in The Fullbrook back in the 90’s. We exchanged pleasantries and she held the door open for me. The Duran Duran song turned out to be Ordinary World, which while a decent tune it’s no New Moon On Monday, so I switched off and followed Jo in.

There is no real ale here so I grabbed a well earned pint of Madri. Truly Madri Deeply indeed. The Fatman Scoop song Be Faithful came on. A song that I think is truly dreadful. I pondered going back outside for a bit of Ordinary World action but thought heading out and coming back in would make me look odd, but when has that ever bothered me? Fatman Scoop gave way to Mo Money Mo Problems by Notorious BIG which is epic. The Music Gods were back behaving.

I sat at a table and the people alongside me got their food and that was it. My nose was in the air like on one of those old Bisto adverts. My great mate “Comedy” Dave arrived shortly afterwards and we wasted no time in heading for the dining area. Me and Comedy both love the crispy chicken wings here, and if we came one day and they were the only things available we would be fine with this.

I managed to sit on a wonky chair and by the time I had fannied around and eventually swapped it the waitress had arrived to take our order. I hadn’t even looked at the menu. The waitress promised to come back. Note to self, get the crispy wings ordered then fanny about with furniture.

I perused the menu noting that a plain naan was £1.50 with a cheese one being £4. I wondered how much cheese I would be getting or did they buy it in from Harrods? At this time of day, a lot of the cheese in Mozza’s has those yellow reduced stickers on. They could easily have sent someone round to the one on the Fellows Park site.

I went for butter chicken, crispy wings and split the difference between the naan breads with the £2 garlic one, commenting that it wasn’t an issue as I would be unlikely to be snogging that evening. There was another hello this time with another Jo this one a lovely fellow Saddler. The food came out and it was epic and Comedy paid for it all which was thoroughly decent of him.

We departed and I noticed that a bus was due in 9 minutes, so I decided I was too fat to walk into town and opted to wait for it. It came 5 minutes early and was soon pulling up outside the Manor Hospital. In my 34 years of working since leaving school I think this is the first time I have been back outside my place of employment 3 hours after leaving it. We pressed on and the bus was in town at the same time it should have been picking me up from outside Champy’s. The driver put his out of service sign on, his lights off and departed. He must have been on a promise.

I opted to go to Katz. There was a kind of bring your own vinyl night going on and as I entered on came Everlasting Love by Love Affair. One of my absolutely favourite songs as a youngster. Pezza and Laura were in which was a nice surprise and Colin the barman who always calls me Andy was standing up the bar. In my excitement at the great song I accidentally called him Andy. Oh well what goes around eh?

Laura shouted me a pint of local brewery AJ’s Snap, Tackle & Prop which was in excellent nick. I went over to sit by Pezza who commented that I smelt like I’d been to Champy’s. Maybe the garlic naan wasn’t such a good idea.

Pezza took a selfy of the three of us to send to Josh. Sorry Josh for cheating on you with your other best Man.

I popped to the Walsall Arms to break up the journey home. Again great music timing was on my side, as I walked in as Working My Way Back To You by Detroit Spinners which is another childhood favourite was just starting.

It was busy in there but I got served straight away, this time a pint of my favourite Lemon Dream by Jaz the delightful landlady as I excitedly explained my love for the song.

I took a seat and was quickly joined by a man who I didn’t know asking me if I was by providing my full name. Turned out he went to my secondary school. He recognised me straight away even though I’ve lost hair and gained weight since I left. I didn’t recognise him or remember his name but he was in there with a lass from secondary school and two from my primary. I remembered the ladies though funnily enough. He introduced me to them all, which was nice as I hadn’t seen them in 3 decades.

It was a shame that I hadn’t bothered shaving all week, was sporting a carrier bag containing my work clothes, wearing a polo shirt that looked like it had been folded and chucked in a bag that morning and smelling like I’d been to Champy’s. What an impression to make after all this time. It felt like I was in an episode of Surprise Surprise. If Cilla was still with us I’d have half expected her to stroll in and start singing.

I had a good chat with him, he told me good news about someone who used to bully me and he bought me a Lemon Dream. All good. When I left school I hated the place so much I only attempted to keep in touch with 2 friends and this quickly petered out. I joined Friends Reunited back in the day but nothing came of that. Friends Reunited? Nice whooooo for Scott Mills there.

Dave rejoined his group, I enjoyed the music so opted to stay for one more. I tried to buy Dave a pint back but he insisted on buying me another. Fine by me.

I had that one and went home. Great and somewhat cheaper night than expected. I’ve now had a shave and smartened myself up.

The Summer of 1997 was an interesting time to be a Saddler. Legendary Manager Chris Nicholl had departed and we hoped to get a big name to replace him. We got who was to be fondly known as Big Fat Jan. Our first foreign manager which was exciting but he had been out of the game a while and had been running a bowling alley if I remember correctly prior to his arrival.

His first friendly was away at Bromsgrove on a glorious sunny day. Early signings hadn’t looked good and when Kyle Lightbourne our star striker who had departed in the Summer appeared in the crowd to watch, Steve Stuart asked if he’d brought his boots.

We won that day 3-1 but I remember little of the game other than when I was sitting on the terrace, just right of the goal eating sausage chips and beans when a wayward shot came right at me causing me to spill beans all down my t-shirt.

We lost away at Mansfield 2-1 which featured an exciting substitute appearance by a lad called Roger Boli. We won’t see him again was the general consensus as we all departed.

It was a pretty uninspiring pre season but we signed Boli which was pleasing. The final friendly was just a youth team jobbie at Bilston. We sat in the main stand just behind Jan and noted him going down to the dugout about 15 minutes in. Oh he’s not happy with something and going to make a change. No, he lit a fag. smoked it and went back to his seat.

The first month of the season wasn’t great. Victories over Exeter in both legs of the first round of the League Cup were the only wins until the last Saturday when the first league win finally decided to come knocking. And what a win it was. Another new signing Jeff Peron put in a ridiculous high cross which people behind me were moaning at but somehow Boli made a connection to it with an overhead kick. Simply one of the best goals I’ve seen live and initially nobody celebrated. Everyone was thinking did we just see that? Boli went on to grab a hat trick in a 3-1 win although coverage of this was lost in the coming days due to the death of Princess Diana.

It was halfway through September when we next won. This time away at Nottingham Forest in the next round of the League Cup. Paul Mitchell had got us a lift with a Forest fan who knew the key info as where to park and drink. A Justin Skinnner header gave us a memorable win at The City Ground. A Forest fan told me in the pub afterwards “you know we’ll destroy in the second leg?”. “You probably will” I replied “but you can’t take tonight off us.”

The home leg was epic, eventually. A packed Bescot, underneath the lights and live on Sky. We went two goals down but a quick fire Andy Watson brace put us ahead on aggregate amid scenes of pandemonium. “What is going on here?” being the Sky commentators puzzled enquiry.

League wins were still at a premium but Sheffield United were dispatched in another memorable night at Bescot in the cup. The cup run ended with a 4-1 loss away at West Ham but another memorable night.

In the 2nd round of The F.A Cup we were away at Macclesfield. The Macc Lads had just come up from The Conference and doing well and unbeaten at home in Division 4 while we were still struggling to win games in Division 3. Steve Stuart drove and we found a great pub. As soon as we walked in a Macclesfield fan fan approached us and asked “is there any good pubs by your ground?” “One or two, why?” we replied puzzled. “Because today is going to be a draw you know that?” Me and Steve fell over ourselves in our haste to accept the draw.

We went 2 up, Macclesfield were reduced to 10 men and we just took control. Jeff Peron put in one of the finest winger displays I’ve ever seen and how he didn’t score still baffles me. He missed one chance and made a donkey ears gesture to us. I asked at 6-0 if 6 was enough to have our score spelt out in letters on the results vidi printer. Nobody was sure. I turned round just as number 7 went in. “Now it will be spelt out.”.

On the way out I commented that Efe Sodje getting sent off had given us the green light to run riot to which Darren Fellows replied “I think you’ll find Sodje starting the game gave us the green light to run riot.” Me and Steve changed our mind about accepting the draw.

Our third round match against Peterborough was called off meaning we would be in the 4th round draw which was something of a novelty. A few of us gathered in The Fullbrook to watch us get Manchester United away. There was a collective cheer then a universal shit as the reality of still having to get past Peterborough hit.

A massive crowd went to London Road that night. A stunning display saw us win 2-0 amongst joyous scenes. I was living with Paul Mitchell at the time and we got home and it was all a bit subdued after a long emotional night . We stood in the Kitchen, not saying much. He fed the cats and it just hit us. “We’re going to Old Trafford.” Renewed joyous scenes.

I worked for a company called Corroy Products at the time and I got on really well with the rep from one of our main suppliers Resisser Screws. They advertised at Old Trafford and he’d said a couple of months earlier that if Walsall ever played at Old Trafford, he would get me in their box. We laughed. True to his word though, two days after the Peterborough game he came in specially to honour his word. I was grateful but turned it down. Everyone thought I was mad but an occasion like that I wanted to be in the stand with my mates.

We lost the game 5-1 to a full strength Manchester United but just seeing us score a goal there was ace. United treated us well and even Alex Ferguson said nice things about us afterwards.

The league season continued to be laborious but another chance of Wembley was looming. The 3rd round of The Auto Windscreens Shield saw us away at Bristol Rovers. I missed that one but but by all accounts it was pretty turgid. Boli hardly touched the ball as it ended 0-0 at full time. Jimmy Walker said afterwards that as the final whistle blew Boli rushed for the changing room and his face dropped when told that there was extra time. It was then explained that golden goal was in effect and next goal was the winner. Pretty much straight from kick off Boli went on a crazy run, scored the winner, asked “ok?” and dashed off the pitch.

We lost the first leg of the area final 2-0 but despite this a large crowed still went down to Bournemouth for the second leg. We went 2-0 up levelling the aggregate but straight away Bournemouth pulled one back. We went 3-1 up and dared to dream but again straight away Bournemouth scored again meaning we lost 4-3 on aggregate and our first Wembley visit was again out the window and a miserable journey home followed.

The league season petered out after that, although a stunning win at promotion chasing Watford occurred along with Peron’s only goal for us in a rare win over Wigan but I think we only stayed up because there was 4 worse teams and he was sacked in the Summer. The cup runs will be forever remembered. Big Fat Jan will always be in Walsall folklore. My mate Stubbsy who was running a cafe in Blackpool at the time and named his largest breakfast after him, and despite the dismal league form he will always be spoken of fondly by Walsall fans. This was apparent talking to folk before and during Tuesday’s win over Morecambe.

He didn’t get another job in English football management and went on to run a pub in the Wilnecote area of Tamworth and for many years my ambition was to go and have a pint with him. I finally got around to this in 2017, taking Blackpool Jane along with me, only to find he had left the pub two weeks earlier.

Thanks for the memories Jan, sleep well fella.

Tuesday was a very busy day at work, a bit stressful but I had football on the evening to look forward to, to help get me through the day. Walsall v Morecambe wasn’t likely to be a classic but an evening with lots of friends is always good.

The plan was to head into Pleck after work, grab food then meet Asps at the LMRCA Club on Wednesbury Road. Don’t ask what LMRCA stands for. I don’t know. If I ever own the place I’d change it to MCMLXXIV Club to signify the year I was born. Then again I can’t really try to make everything all about me, and we’d probably need planning permission for the sign to fit all that lot on.

I’d been a bit organised on Monday evening and done research on Google maps street view, trying to deduce if Prince Street off Pleck Road was a straight one and would bring me right out in Pleck. It wasn’t, I decided it wasn’t much of a short cut and opted to stick to the main road route and head past the former Brown Lion.

It was raining at half 4, so I sat in the foyer using the wi-fi to catch up on social media, hoping the rain would ease off. I was in no great hurry, Asps wasn;t due until 6ish. At 5 I headed out. Still raining but I had to press on. I turned right out of the hospital which makes a change. I do like to take different routes on my walks. It keeps stalkers, my enemies and government spies on their toes.

I got to the corner of Rollingmill Street and thought ‘ooooh, I could go down here, shortcut behind the petrol station, out onto Wednesbury Road. All down hill. This is the best idea ever.’ Ladies and gentlemen, I am the man who has made a million bad decisions in life. I was soon to find out that this was number 1,000,001.

First error. I was in a world of my own and looking down as per normal and didn’t realise until I was right upon it, that the one pavement on Corporation Street West is fenced off. I couldn’t be arsed to cross the road like a normal person would have, preferring instead to edge along the very thin bit of pavement not behind the fence while passing cars gave me good splashings.

The short cut? Well it’s not well maintained. Our roads aren’t so I guess a little used walkway isn’t going to be. It was unlit and I got a 1/4 of the way along and just about saw the massive puddle taking up the whole path. Nice quick u turn and back onto the pavement.

Finally onto Wednesbury Road. Or Wednesbury River as I think it was identifying as. Seriously the pavements were flowing with water. My favourite REM song is Find The River. Michael Stipe if you are reading, you could have found one here and mot had to leave your car to admire it.

It was like I was taking part in the triple jumpo as I ventured along trying to avoid puddles but it was hopeless. I was soaked. What’s the song us Saddlers used to sing? Oh yes, “going down the Wednesbury Road, to see the Walsall aces.” I started singing “going down the Wednesbury Road, to get soaking trainers and laces.”

My mind wandered off to The Crystal Maze and when contestants entered the maze through the Aztec Zone and had to get there via rowing boats, and I was just thinking how that set up would be useful now. When I reached the car park at the end of the road, Michael Stipe if you’re still reading, never mind finding a river. I had now found a bloody lake. I’d have needed wellies up to my arse before even thinking about negotiating it. This time I did cross the road.

I made it to Pleck and straight into Yum. I visited this place just after it opened in 2021 after being lured in by a leaflet through my door. It was so new they were doing a photo shoot with burgers as I arrived on that occasion. I’d enjoyed that visit and left with a cheerful “see you again soon.”It’s only taken nearly 3 years to go back. Quite quick by my standards.

I didn’t care about food anymore. I wanted a mug of tea, a towel dry footwear and maybe a hug. No hot drinks were on the menu and I didn’t ask about the other items. I went for the Mother Clucker chicken burger, hold the lettuce.

The food arrived quickly. They weren’t shy with the sauces. 6 sachets (ketchup beating mayo 4-2) and four other pots too. The chicken burger was ace. but I think another another 2 portions of fries were needed to see off all of those sauces. It was £6.50 for the food, he had offered me a meal deal but I didn’t want a cold drink so it may have been better value had I gone for that.

Back out into the elements and the short walk around the corner to the club. Absolute Radio decided at this juncture to play some AC/DC which really lifted my mood and I was soon up the bar in the club. I did take a picture of the club outside but it didn’t come out very well and for once I didn’t hang around to check.

When The Saddlers Club at Bescot Stadium closed down, The Independent Saddlers Supporters Association (ISSA) set up this club as an alternative venue for Walsall fans to drink on match days, which was well received as drinking options by the ground were already limited and we’ve since lost The Fullbrook and The George. From here ISSA have launched many projects for the benefit of the local community, the most notable was subsidising a hot food van to provide the staff of the Manor Hospital free food during the pandemic. Before my time there though or it might have needed a bit more subsidising.

I joined Asps at his table, and it was ace to see him having not done so since we went to see Belinda Carlisle in Birmingham last February. He informed me that the match was subject to a pitch inspection and before I’d had my second sip of beer it was called off. Oh well.

We had a good catch up and a laugh. Asps then gave me a lift home which was very much appreciated. Part of the route including gong through Walsall’s red light district, which in it’s heyday brought almost as many visitors to the town as the famous Illuminations. There were no prostitutes about this time though. They must have got a bit wet and gone home.

I was home just as the match would have kicked off so time for a jokey Facebook status update saying that I hadn’t expected a big crowd at the game but I’d just arrived at the ground and it was deserted.

I soon had dry feet, a big mug of tea and music on. I’ve recently rediscovered the amazing REM song Strange Currencies, which is one of my faves but not heard in years so I gave that a blasting and reflected that the evening had been alright in the end.

Last Saturday the plan was to get up early, go to Jack & Ada’s for a mossiv breakfast, do a big food shop, housework then writing and editing. Especially as I’m so close to finishing Greg Doesn’t Date, that 6 episode daft show I’ve been working on for a few months.

It half went to plan. I had the lurgy, couldn’t sleep so I was up at half 5, sitting on my settee whilst drinking tea and listening to George Ezra. I’d been meaning to research a George Ezra song for two weeks but hadn’t got around to it, so then had seemed like a good time. The song I was after was Paradise. I wasn’t a fan of George’s early work but I love Paradise.

I made more tea, fannied around on social media and went back to bed in time to listen to Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. I got back up at half ten and all of the mornings plans were binned. Writing and editing? I didn’t even turn the pc on.

The mossiv breakfast? I just about made it to town in time to grab a sausage, bacon and egg sammo from the red van at the bottom of the market before catching the train to the match.

I know I’m 49 now and feeling it but those stairs at Bescot Stadium Railway Station don’t get any easier do they? Our local MP Valerie Vaz has been pushing for a lift to be installed here. Come on Double V, crack the whip. Chase those votes. While you’re at it, if they could also build toilets, a Costa, small W H Smiths and maybe a micro pub on the waste land behind the ticket office then footfall for said station would go through the roof. Using the new lifts of course.

The match day experience is on the up. The Locker (nee Saddlers Club) was officially opened before kick off, although as I’m not a season ticket holder or a subscriber to the football club’s official membership scheme it would have been £5 in, and as it was 2.50, and i wasn’t drinking anyway I didn’t head in but will soon as i need to review it. There was a welcome return of a food van by said club and there were pop up bars at either end of the lower tier. All good.

The match was scrappy but I timed my run to perfection for the Bescot Bar at half time, reaching the coffee machine just before another customer and noticing it going straight out of service after he got his drink. Meanwhile next to us, it was my ace Niece Amber’s turn to try and get some joy out of the roll a 6 to begin snack vending machine which eventually yielded a return.

Talking of Amber it was wonderful to see her along with my Great Niece Frankie, as well as many other Saddlers including friend of the blog Elliot Garbett who kindly invited me for drinks in The Pretty Bricks which I still need to retick now it has new gaffers so that will happen soon. I may even report on it here.

The second half was also scrappy and I found my mind wandering away from the game and more on what squad I would assemble if I was Berwick Rangers manager. I once had an unsuccessful spell in charge on Championship Manager 97/98, but now they are out of The Scottish League expectations may be lower. The squad I was finalising was looking good, all pundits would have been impressed even Roy Keane but the final whistle blew and I had to dash for the train. The run slowed as I reached those stairs again.

I needed a train to the Tile Hill area of Coventry, as it was a night out for Craig’s birthday and as I reached New Street I saw a West Midlands Trains service that was due had been cancelled. The next one was half an hour which gave me time to have a mooch around. I needed food and I was still suffering with lurgy, and was so bunged up I decided a packet of Tunes would also be handy.

I got to W H Smith, and guess what? No Tunes. Are they not a thing anymore? You’d think a railway station would be the one place they would be on sale following that advert in the 80’s. Firdt cladd dicket to Noddingham and all that. They don’t want that at the ticket office. Lockets or Soothers so I went old skool with the former. I grabbed a prawn sandwich, yes yes I know but I never turn down corporate football (except when we played at Old Trafford in 1998).

At the checkout I also asked for a scratchcard. I heard my words, and because of the lurgy I barely understood what I was saying myself. What chance did the bloke serving have? Not sure if he pulled off too many in error but I got two scratchcards, the total came to £7.60. I hadn’t been brave enough to look at the price before I got the sandwich from the fridge. With the way I was talking I could have had no complaints if he’d handed me 20 Benson & Hedges and charged me £60. And I’m not a smoker.

The shop had Valentines Day stuff on sale. Great. The season where I am reminded I’m single every time I walk in a shop is upon us, and like Christmas it gets earlier every year. Oh well, get this day out of the way and the shops can start stocking up on the Halloween merchandise.

I demolished the sandwich, popped a Tune and headed for the loo. The sink had those new fangled handlebar taps which include the dryer. I always struggle to use these and this was no exception. I made a joke of it to the nice lady who was cleaning the sink next to me and we exchanged pleasantries. The Tunes had worked and I was now talking normally again. I wished her a good day and headed out. Oh my God, me talking to a woman. Right, I’ve mastered it in men’s toilets, just got to get the hang of it in pubs.

The next train had now been cancelled and the one half an hour after that was showing as departing from Birmingham International. With all this free time now on my hands I could have run to McDonalds on the ramp for a cheeseburger and saved a fortune on the prawn sandwich. I text Craig and he just said to get an Avanti train to Coventry and he’d pick me up from there. Plan. And it worked a treat. A train was coming soon, so I found the Avanti ticket machine and managed to grab an evening ticket to Coventry for just £2.80. Although by now I was past caring and would have paid £60 as long as I got a free 20 pack of Benson & Hedges.

Craig picked me up from Coventry Station, we parked up and set off for the first pub, I thought we were out in Tile Hill but when I was over there a couple of weeks ago in a pub called The Newlands, I didn’t realise that a queuing system was in place at the bar, so I just marched up and found a space, as you do. Well as you do in normal pubs. Another customer took exception to this (waiting until he was about to walk away with his drinks before piping up), and I’d already been wound up when I indicated to the barmaid that he was next and he didn’t thank me.

I went to the toilet in there shortly afterwards and all 3 urinals and the cubicle were vacant but I held back in case of a queuing system in there too. This got me thinking. If there was one in there I’d like it to be like in a bank. Rope to stand alongside and automated announcements. “Urinal number 2 please” or “Cubicle is free. Enjoy your dump” etc etc. Anyway Craig must have not wanted to risk another round of queuegate so took us elsewhere.

First pub was New Spires in Coundon. This was completely decked out in England flags which got my approval. Crags found a table announcing “we’ll sit here so we can watch the darts and the football.” I looked up, a lad and his missus were playing darts. I found it a bit odd that Craig wanted to watch this. I sat down, took a swig of my pint and then noticed the massive screen on the other wall showing MVG v RVB. I’m such a dumbass at times.

We jumped in a taxi, well nearly the wrong onet o start with. Craig booked one which was white so he saw one outside and went to dive in, only for ours to be another white one that was just pulling onto the car park.

The plan had been to have a pub crawl but at The Old Clarence in Earlsden, our next port of call Craig had a £25 bar tab which he’d won at a quiz. This payed for 6 pints of Strongbow Dark Fruit which we set about but first had an odd exchange with a local who accused Craig of sounding like a southerner. Craig explained that he’s a Walsall lad living in Cov but to no avail. He expected me to jump in and stick up for him but my voice had returned to lurgified status and I didn’t want to do the Walsall accent a dis-service so I resumed my default stance of not talking to people I don’t know.

The ciders were good but as you know, with pleasure there has to be pain and that came with the DJ playing Believe” by Cher. Although some of this was drowned out by everyone tutting.

It was curry time. The restaurant had no visible sign that I could see, just an arrow pointing up the stairs with words saying “check out our rental places”. What was going on? Was Craig taking me to a late night estate agents? Had he secretly found a flat he wanted us both to move into? My mind started thinking of weekend mornings and Craig heading out to grab the sausage and egg McMuffins, returning to present them to me in bed. Yes my imagination runs wild at times and I should get it checked by a professional.

It was actually a curry house at the top of the stairs, but unlicensed. Craig knows my stance on these but to fair it was his first visit and he didn’t know. I refuse to take my own booze to these places but Craig dashed to the shop across the road and just made it before it closed, returning with a 10 pack of dark fruit. I accepted one just to keep him happy for his birthday.

The people on the next table got their food and they all had curries in those big satellite dish style bowls that used to be common in Walsall. This excited me. We ordered and the starters came quickly, I’d only eaten half of my first poppadom. I only had one Nargis Kebab during 2023 but I’m pleased to say that 2024 is going better as this was to be my second of the year and it was ace.

Craig’s main came out first, in the big satellite dish bowl. My chicken tikka massala came out in a normal bowl. It was an okay size but I wasn’t going to be picking up MTV2 on it. The food was ace, service really good and full marks to Crags, he’d picked a good un. Great food, great company and another free cider. Paradise running through your bloody veins to quote George Ezra.

We went back to his and played a beat the into music quiz where I had to name the artist and title from the 50 best selling songs of 1999, with a point for each part answer. I scored 97 out of 100 but the final one was an absolute bag of wank I’d not heard of which cost me 2 points. I was accused during this of being a secret B*Witched fan due to how quickly I identified Jessie Hold On and Blame It On The Weatherman. I will confess that I have belted out the former hundreds of times whilst washing up.

Class day. I didn’t win on the scratchcards though.

   

 

I left work on Thursday in a good mood. I’m glad to say that this is pretty standard. I’ve been at the Manor Hospital 8 and a half months now and have only left in a bad mood a few times, the most recent of those due to the antics of a delivery driver that looks like Sergei from the meerkat adverts. Thursday however there was an added spring in the step for 3 reasons.

(1) the first song on Absolute Radio was Cryin’ by Aerosmith. Absolute tune and although I resisted the urge to sing out loud, I did give it good portions of lip syncing and the nurses and patients mingling on the West Wing corridor would have been in no doubt that I was enjoying myself.

(2) it was light as I left, always guaranteed to lift the spirits and I celebrated by walking into town along the canal, something I haven’t done since the nights drew in.

(3) I was heading for light refreshments. Always a mood enhancer. I have been going to Josh’s for Sunday dinner lots of late so to repay the favour I’d offered to take him to The Registry for tea. Yes, there is a special offer of food for a fiver at the moment so I know I appear like a tight wad but you know it’s January, times are hard and I love a bargain.

We hadn’t confirmed anything. Josh had said he would have to sort baby sitters if he could and wouldn’t be able to come out till 7. By the time I got to The Reg I hadn’t heard off him so took it he couldn’t get baby sitters so I ordered food and drink. I sat down and he messaged saying he would be there at 7. We got there in the end.

I’d taken advantage of this offer the week before with the fish and chips. I’d requested no peas but it came with them anyway. I left them, apologies to John and Norma Major if you’re reading. This time I went for lasagne with a pint of Inch’s which came to a total of £8.20. Bargain.

The music was good starting with Amazulu’s Too Good To Be Forgotten, some indie goodness then Kylie’s Better the Devil You Know which is a perfect a pop song as you can get.

The lasagne came quickly and was soon put away. Gary Timmins and Micky Mullen turned up so I had a chat with them. Gary had the honour of opening the newly refurbished Wetherspoons and pouring the first pint which must have been ace.

Josh arrived and went for the chicken wrap. I didn’t want him to eat alone so I looked at the starters. You can have 3 for the price of 2 so I decided to have two and offer Josh the third which he declined. So I had all three. Scampi, chicken goujons and bbq hunters chips. With another pint of inch’s. Josh was driving so had a J20, but I suspect he was envious of my cider. It’s not often another man is jealous of my Inch’s.

The starters were amazing and I shovelled them down like how The Simpsons eat their food. Happy, it was time for us to check out the refurbished St Matthews Hall (Walsall Wetherspoons), which reopened earlier in the day. Before the refurb we’d heard reports of the conservatory being extended, the toilets being moved (I was just hoping the leak under urinal no 2 would be fixed) and the upstairs section of the back part being reopened. None of these happened. The place was painted, new lighting installed, new carpet and furniture, cellar work and theconservatory was replaced with a new build. The faulty handdrier was fixed but there was still moisture under urinal no 2.

A nice barmaid called Demi told us all of the work that had happened and the place looks good, it smelt new and the beer was top notch. When I was in there on New Years Eve. Chris Kelly was saying that they should install a fireman’s pole to get down from the toilets. As it’s unlucky to cross on the stairs, this would save the issue of you getting to the top as someone gets to the bottom and then you have to gesture to each other as you work out who has right of way. Plus you’d get back to your drink/up the bar quicker so it would have been good for Sir Tim. Shame it didn’t happen.

We sat in the back part and the plastic books that used to light up have now gone which is a shame. Josh asked me about pubs in town and about the new ones that sprung up around the late 90’s. Talk about being in my element. If universities needed lectures on this subject I’d be raking it in.

Josh had to head off but he dropped me off outside the Walsall Arms. The fire inside was roaring, which was a welcome sight as was Lemon Dream being on one of the handpulls. I then spotted a new exciting addition to the wares on offer in there. A big jar of pickled eggs. I asked Alison the barmaid if they were trying to get me in there every day. After a pleasant pint by the fire it was home time.. I try to be in bed by 10 on a school night these days and I just about made it this time.

Talking of Josn, on Friday night he started a challenge to walk from Coventry City’s ground to then visit all the pro West Midlands clubs ending at Bescot Stadium. I asked if he was pleased that Coventry are no longer playing at Northampton. Anyway he did this on his own, in freezing cold temperatures to raise money for Cancer Research in honour of a fellow Saddler Mark Rainer who sadly lost his life to Cancer recently. He would love any donations which can be made on this link. Thank you. https://gofund.me/661dd320