Bank Holiday weekend got off to an unusual start. Asps and I were going to see B*Witched in Worcester Cathedral. I wasn’t initially sure when he first asked. Had I been on Popmaster and Ken Bruce asked me for 3 in 10 from B*Witched, I’d have smashed it. I’d have shown off and got 5 but that’s it. But 5 is 3 more songs than I knew when I saw The Twang for the first time and it’ll be the 4th time for them later this year, and it’s always good to do something different so I agreed. I took straight to YouTube to watch the “Jesse Hold On” video as that’s my favourite.

I saw a message from Asps at dinnertime with event info. It said “we will be operating a strict dress code of smart casual. Effort is required.” I’ve never known dress restrictions for a gig before and I”d got my change of clothes with me so was committed to it. I’d been on a 15 pub crawl of Worcester back in 2011, so I knew that there was plenty of options should I be refused entry.

Asps had decided on a more wacky theme for his outfit and had brought hats too. A Mexican one and a cow girl. I got to choose. I went Mexican. I’ve walked past the boxes of Old El Paso in supermarkets so I think I qualify.

Asps had purchased a B*Witched cd previously and listened to it. He’d done his home work. Me, like so often in my school days – hadn’t. We had it on in the car and it was a pleasant drive down the M5 and we were soon in Worcester. Asps had a Wetherspoons in mind for tea but as we passed a place I spotted a Space Invaders machine in the window and a glance in revealed more goodness. We entered Retroids Arcade Bar excitedly.

There was a row of pinball machines and much to my surprise and delight my favourite The Addams Family was there. Motion carried. Not played it in about 3 years, so I was a bit rusty with the first ball but the second? My God I hit everything. Two extra balls, jackpot, reply and points galore. Roger Daltrey would have been very impressed.

Downstais I found Pac-Man and gave that a blast. It’s the only time I eat fruit to be fair. The joystick was bit stiff so I only got to sample cherry and strawberry this time but it was still great playing.

We headed to Wetherspoons but en route we spotted a sign in a window declaring “stunning chicken” or something like that so we headed in there. I spotted on the B*Witched message from earlier that we had to be in the cathedral by 7.45, and it was now 7.15. Asps went up to order and we both had the Levant Legend burger and there was a choice of sauce. Asps just picked something at random. If I’d had to choose we would have missed the show.

With time against us I couldn’t fanny about removing stuff off the burger but it was bloody great. Probably the best chicken burger I’ve ever had. Asps had some sort of cauliflower side which he offered me some of, which I was more than happy to decline. I didn’t write down the name of the place OTTO but remembered it by thinking of The Simpsons character. Cracking visit and the lady serving/waitressing was great too.

Whilst awaiting the food, Asps had got talking to some ladies outside, also in hats, also going to the gig. He told them he was with a Mexican and came back in to summons me to join them. We had a group photo. Asps asked what the main ladies name was “Carlin” she replied. “What like the beer?” He asked. I’d thought Carlin out of the film Scum. Different levels eh.

We approached the cathedral just after the curfew so missed the queues but were spotting by the B*Witched social media creator who asked if he could film us walking in. We absolutely agreed and I gave my ticket a wave ala Wayne & Garth in Wayne’s World when they get to meet Alice Cooper.

It was surreal walking in. I’d been to see Clinton Baptiste at Walsall Arena the night before but straight away this was a different vibe. Never been to a gig in a religious premises before. We were shown to our seats, I was slightly disappointing the lady didn’t say “take a pew.” The support act was on. Natalie Abel. This was another first, seeing the support. She was really good. Asps described her as looking like Pixie Lott and singing like Duffy. Good comparisons on both counts. She held this one note so well, I started to fear for the stained glass windows.

With her set nearly up we went to explore and found the bar. Loads of women about and they had heeded the warning of making an effort with the outfits. I had the occasional lustful thought. I could have done with finding the confessional booth, although had I done so, my list of sins would have had to be unfurled like a parchment.

The bar was a pop up jobbie. Canon Taylor at St Mary’s The Mount in Walsall missed a trick here. He could have had one in church and sold Communion Wine. He’d have made a killing and not needed to pass the collection plate round. Anyway, I had planned to bring a bottle of water in with me to see if anyone was about that could turn it into wine, but that lunch time message from Asps had stated no outside drinks to be brought in.

As the interval came to end, I nipped to the loo. This was some distance from our seats and took longer than I expected to make the round trip. Asps enquired where I’d been. “I thought the vicar had got hold of you” he followed up with.

I made the start and they opened with “Rollercoaster.” Great song and within the first 4 songs we’d had three of the 5 I know the others being “Jesse Hold On” and “Blame It On The Weatherman” There were some random covers thrown in like Wilson Phillips “Hold On”, Carly Simon’s “Coming Around Again” and the theme tune from Friends. Never watched a second of that show, but I did by the cd single when The Rembrandts released it as I love the song. There were new songs too. Given the surroundings though, they could have thrown in a hymn or two. “Colours Of Day” would have gone down an absolute storm.

I think this was the first gig I’ve been to that didn’t have alcohol being thrown around although the Sophie B. Hawkins one (detailed here) may also have been like this.

Towards the end we had “To You I Belong” my second favourite, and at 9.50, with the show due to finish at 10 I decided to run for the loo, so I could be back for the finale. Despite knowing the way back, I decided to follow a bloke who didn’t. Plus my timing was off again. The were well into C’est La Vie their biggest hit when I returned. I’d even missed them mixing it up with a bit of Ed Sheeran in the middle apparently but they extended it and I got to hear a good section of it. No encore so we were outside by 9.56 and heading for the car park.

As we hadn’t hung around we were second off the car park, as hoards were just getting back. We were slightly delayed as the bloke in the car in front was in no hurry earning him a “come on George” from me.

We thought the journey home would be plain sailing. Not quite. Our transport overlords had other ideas. They’d shut the M5 at Junction 4. Now I don’t know much about the M5 bar basic destinations, but as a kid Beacon Radio’s travel man was obsessed with M5 junctions 4 & 5, so I remember them being Lydiate Ash and Droitwich respectively. Never thought I’d ever get off at one of them though. So we had a pleasant drive through south Birmingham. This gave Asps the chance top introduce me to the album of Ava Max. I’d never heard of her but liked it. Anyone with a song called “Sweet But Psycho” is alright in my book.

We saw some right dodgy driving though. I used to watch Road Wars on Sky 3 of a Friday night, and some of the manoeuvres we saw would not have looked out of place on that show. To think I failed my two driving tests for very flimsy reasons, but I could (and probably still can) drive a lot better than some of the folk out and about that evening.

There was more travel bosses hilarity to come though as we came through the city centre to find the Aston Expressway also closed. I was glad I’d had that cheeky toilet before we left.

Cracking night. Asps classed it as my birthday present so paid for the tickets, food and drink et al. Cheers Asps. As I type this, it’s pissing down outside. I’ll Blame It On The Weatherman.